Marriage... Does it matter anymore?

[karia]

Oldish subject..newish audience..all brought about by the 'wedding dress' thread and responses to it.

Does marriage matter to you?

[chamb]

I think marriage is important, Its a commitment to one and other about how serious you are. Living together any one can do that, but if its serious marriage is the biggest commitment, when you take your vows serious!!!!

yeh we lived together for nearly 6 years before we got married and had a son, but we had always planned to get married when we got engaged in the first year.

So when better when our son was old enough to take part.

[karia]

I think marriage is important, Its a commitment to one and other about how serious you are. Living together any one can do that, but if its serious marriage is the biggest commitment, when you take your vows serious!!!!

yeh we lived together for nearly 6 years before we got married and had a son, but we had always planned to get married when we got engaged in the first year.

So when better when our son was old enough to take part.

Absolutely chamb!

I'll bet your wedding pics are all the more special for his presence.

I can't even begin to express why it matters to me, just that it was the best moment of my life to stand up there and declare what I felt.

We had lived together for some years also and yes..it does change things, for the better.

[ciderally]

a big yes ....im with chamb and karia they have said it just right

[mccaugm]

I think marriage is important if thats what you want. I married for the first time when I was 18, I was naive and insecure and married the first person who asked me. I then went on to have two children.

When I married for the second time, I was more together and we had lived together for about 4 years before tying the knot. I wanted to have a full mutual commitment and felt more confident in my relationship. I have never been happier and having my third son was the icing on the "wedding cake".

[dellwak]

Well I think marriage still matters.
I came across to Germany 23 years ago meaning to stay for 2 years then move on.
I got married instead and am still here.
If I hadn't got married, I would probably have moved back to Thurso before now.

Wait a minute..........

Errrmmmmm!!!!!!

[Whitewater]

Marriage is a commitment, my wife and I have now been happily married for 38 yrs, it's been both happy & sad, good times and bad times, but we have always been able to share the knocks and spread the load. As you get older you become more dependent on each other, and after the kids have all left you can share more precious time together, and do things you could never afford with a young family. You can look back on your life, see what you have both achieved and built up together and also where you could have done better.

I think that if you live together and the going gets tough, it is perhaps too easy to walk away, though having said that, I know some people who have grown old together, are very happy, but have not committed themselves to marriage, but they are the execption rather than the rule, also people who have married and been divorced after a year or two when thing didn't appear to go as planned for one reason or another.

I think marriage provides a security and a sense of belonging to each other that you can never achieve by just living together, and I think that that security also passes on to your children. But it is important to really know you partner before making the commitment. I first got to know and took out my wife when she was 16yrs old, I then left the area for about 5yrs, came home, took her out again and married when she was 23. It was no overnight courtship, but we both new each other very well by that time, and most of all, enjoyed talking with each other, which is perhaps the most important thing, and life has never been boring.

[dirdyweeker]

I guess I have double standards on this one.

I have been 33 years married now but have always told my daughter to do as she pleases when her time comes as long as she is happy. I think happiness comes before the 'bit of paper' nowadays, the 'bit of paper' comes with maturity and happiness.

[karia]

But it is important to really know you partner before making the commitment. I first got to know and took out my wife when she was 16yrs old, I then left the area for about 5yrs, came home, took her out again and married when she was 23. It was no overnight courtship, but we both new each other very well by that time, and most of all, enjoyed talking with each other, which is perhaps the most important thing, and life has never been boring.

Congratulations Mr & Mrs W!

My OH and I met at 16/17 and got swept in other directions for a decade or so before getting back together..but wherever we were and whatever our circumstances we never lost touch and always talked about everything under the sun.

I feel so sad for those couples you see out for dinner and she is on her phone and he is staring into middle distance and they are not talking and laughing like we are and indeed they are looking down on us for enjoying each others company.

[DeHaviLand]

Of course it matters, all of mine did

[bobandag16]

Oldish subject..newish audience..all brought about by the 'wedding dress' thread and responses to it.

Does marriage matter to you?

nice sound to i am marri
ade better than shacking up together.

[Rie]

i always thought marrige mattered to me, but it obviously didnt to my husband!!
wouldnt do it again, would just live in sin and enjoy being loved.

[BRIE]

I dont think marriage is that important, do we really need a piece of paper to prove a committment to the one we want to spend the rest of our lives with?
Ive been married & think the hardest part when it all falls apart is the whole divorce procedure if i hadnt signed a piece of paper in the first place I wouldnt of had half as much heartache.
I would definately think long & hard about doing it again!

[justine]

yes it matters. To give oneself to another person in mind body and soul is the biggest commitment and worth every minute.I have a wonderful hubby and could never imagine my life without him...
I was reading the other day that the seven year itch has been reduced to five years, they reackon if you split before the 5 year anniversary thats it, but if you get past it you will be together for life.

best thing i ever did was get married,and will love my oh until death do us both part...1000% commitment on both sides....

[Tighsonas4]

MARRIAGE
anyone heard the song there aint a lady living in the land like my old dutch
things have changed since we married. for instance came back home here and couldnt get a house although we had two young kids at that time
never the less all through the years all 59 of them we have seen the mountain tops and the valleys but it has only helped to bond us closer together. just keeping the final part of our vows now regards tony

[karia]

we have seen the mountain tops and the valleys but it has only helped to bond us closer together. just keeping the final part of our vows now

That's beautiful Tony...may both you spend a long time fulfilling that final part!

[crashbandicoot1979]

Nope, it definitely doesn't matter. I don't think that people who are married are any more committed to each other than those who aren't. I've been with my OH for 7 years now and I know more than one couple who got married and divorced in that time.

If someone wants to get married then good for them, go for it. But it isn't for everyone. We might get married one day but it will be a small, private thing.

[lady penelope]

Marriage is important, I was married a long time ago, then divorced shortly after.

I met the love of my life while going through my divorce, in fact the first time we met was at my wedding, so yes marriage is important to me.

We have been together 12 years now and most people assume we are married as I changed my surname.

[Solus]

I agree with Crash, you dont need to get married to show your commitment to your partner. I have been with my partner now for over 7 years, and over that time we have faced every struggle and every happy time together, I know we are commited to each other, we could not have survived the early years together if we were not rock solid ! She is my best friend, lover and partner, by getting married it proves nothing we dont already know about each other. Yes we have discussed marriage, often, but we already class ourselves as being married, its a bit of paper at the end of the day to us.

[Ricco]

Oldish subject..newish audience..all brought about by the 'wedding dress' thread and responses to it.

Does marriage matter to you?

Of course it does, sweetheart. (when's it going to happen?)

Seriously, these days we are fobbing off too much of our responsibility as 'old fashioned' in all manner of ways. Once upon a time people took neighbours, love, marriage, having kids, other people's property, etc as serious responsibilities. Now too many of them are looking for ways of backing out and leaving things to others to sort out.