Bringing up Baby

[Ash]

is anyone else watching this?

im in shock! the first mentor believes that you put ur baby down at 7 and leave them to 7 in morning, and leave them outside during the day in the pram!, she says your baby adapts to your life not the other way around, it just seems so cruel, she encourages parents to have parties as the kids wont wake up, there are two other mentors, ones lots of love and affection. and the last one is tribal methods

[balto]

hi ash i saw a clip of it this morning and was totally shocked by that ladys ideas of the right way to bring up a child how she can say babys are just attention seekers is beyond me, i for 1 never left any of my 3 to cry.

[sam]

Its not the babies that are attention seekers it the adults.
Some folk have some pretty strange ideas about bringing up kids, i was speaking to a friend the other day who said she overheard a couple of women talking about her and her child because her kid was in a pushchair and sucking on a dummy,When i said it was little wonder she asked what i ment (now her boy is 4 1/2 and i firmly believe that he is way to old to be sucking on a dummy and definatly to old to be pushed around in a pushchair )
so as i asked her why she has him in the pushchair her answer he takes to long to walk anywhere and she cant be bothered going everywhere slowly, so when i asked why he has a dummy her answer to that was och it keeps him quite.
While speaking to her the kid spat the dummy out about 6 times only for her to pick it up and stick it right back in his mouth, then she wondered why i said she was hindering his development some folk have no sense and she isnt some young lassie either she is in her late 20's

[wifie]

I suppose they can have as many of these programmes as they like but people will do what the want anyway. Fair enough. I would like to know though - which idiots pay that 'Truby King' woman up to a £1000 per day (!) for her wisdom. She has no children and the only empathy she showed was when she touched the mother's arm as she had to listen to her newborn child screaming on the monitor.

[bobsgirl]

I will say when I had my kids I used to watch these programs religiously. They can be very helpful but at the end of the day, every parent and child are different and therfore these methods dont always work.
I for one would never have left my kids outside in their buggy whether it be my own front door or a shop, I would always be with them.

Leaving them to cry? Now I did this method but it wasnt leaving them to cry all night, it was the go back in 5 mins, then go back in 10 mins method and it really did work.
My kids are now 5 and 7, and they still have a bedtime routine like that and they do play up a bit to stay up later but they only get to on weekends or if they have clubs on.

Also I can have a night out starting in my house, having a laugh and I can guarantee that my kids will sleep through it!! Nothing wrong with that at all. Very rare but it does happen.

[Dadie]

I think I would rather bury my head in the sand than watch that !
At least then I wont get my blood pressure up!!
I suppose each to their own in bringing up their kids but most of us just muddle through without (hopefully) getting too much wrong!

[cat]

hi.i was doing it all wrong as i was watching!! i had my 10wk old baby up to that time of night having her bottle,lots of cuddles and then she fell asleep!
even their little girl wanted to cuddle their new baby. i couldn't of done it, wouldn't want to. but then i don't mind life being different when a baby arrives!
in saying that,at 10 wks my baby hardly cries and has her last feed at 10 ish and thats her till morning,any time from 7am till 9 this morning!!

[mums angels]

I never watched this last night but a friend did and we were discussing it this morning .

I have never and will never leave my children outside in a pram or outside a shop, however i do believe that a child can go to bed at 7 until 7 , it takes time and patience , with my first i never let her cry and she went to bed at the same time as us uintil she was one years old ..not good !!! now with the second at 6 weeks old i did the cry it out method with him starting at 7 o'clock put him down in a dark room returning every few minutes to touch his tummy and reassure him that i was still there and as he woke in the night i didn't talk to him or put lights on , i fed him and put him back down etc

now with third it may sound harsh but i was blessed with a very placid child
so started this on day one we came home the night he was born and did the same method, he never cried for long he almost went straight to sleep often not even needing one visit to touch his tummy for reassurance , i never let him nap on me whilst at home , he was always put down in his bed after a week he never made a peep and when he had his night feeds he went back without a whimper ...i was very lucky with him and tommorow he is two and i have never had a problem with his bedtime routine, bed everynight around 7 if not before ...only problem is having to wake him in the mornig to get him organised to take the others to school, he loves his bed luckily all 3 go to bed without much of a fuss, the older two get to stay up later on a weekend bu t don't fuss too much when the bed word is mentioned

but as the saying goes ..what works for one doesn't always work for another

[Oddquine]

I'm glad I'm not bringing children up nowadays.........too much interference from government and theories from "professionals".

Beats me how on earth we managed forty+ years ago................common sense, maybe?

[mums angels]

I'm glad I'm not bringing children up nowadays.........too much interference from government and theories from "professionals".

Beats me how on earth we managed forty+ years ago................common sense, maybe?

well thats the funny thing , nowadays i think parents worry so much about what other people are doing and what the health visitors say etc ...common sense flies out of the window. i don't worry about what other people think , i do what suits me best and it works for me and my kids

[DM07]

God I couldnt beleive it when I watched it. I had to watch it again on channel 4 plus 1. I was nearly crying watching the 'sleeping 7 until 7 method'. Im not sure on the bottle feeding but I thought there is no way that the bairn will sleep through the 12 hours and sure enough the poor bairn was up after 1 and a half hours. The 1st mentor has never had children either. I have a 9 week old and she is taken in to our bed in the night for feeds if she wakes and she will stay there until morning. I carry her about in the papose as a new baby is not used to a pram, they are used to being squashed against mother. She is slowly getting used to the pram. She slept from 9 last night until 6 this morning at 9 weeks old and she is exclusivly breastfed. This is the 4th night she has slept through. Her brother was brought up the same way but you do look into things too much with your first and I read a little too much. He never slep though the night until 7 months old!!! Every baby different. The second mentors 'do it your way' is good advice since every bairn different and every mother knows her bairns best

[cat]

very true oddquine. its not the babies thats changed(my mum tells me!)
its the parents!
too many rushing to get back to work or just selfish and dont want to change!!
and i'm not having a go at working mums as i've been one,but i'd rather stay at home with my baby now,i can live without a lot of luxuries to do so, i hope!!

[dunderheed]

is anyone else watching this?

im in shock! the first mentor believes that you put ur baby down at 7 and leave them to 7 in morning, and leave them outside during the day in the pram!, she says your baby adapts to your life not the other way around, it just seems so cruel, she encourages parents to have parties as the kids wont wake up, there are two other mentors, ones lots of love and affection. and the last one is tribal methods

when i was a baby i spent most of my day out in the garden in the pram, it was the done thing in them days. when it comes to raising children i would suggest binning the books and avoiding these programmes as they all give conflicting views - go with your gut instinct

[mums angels]

is anyone else watching this?

im in shock! the first mentor believes that you put ur baby down at 7 and leave them to 7 in morning, and leave them outside during the day in the pram!, she says your baby adapts to your life not the other way around, it just seems so cruel, she encourages parents to have parties as the kids wont wake up, there are two other mentors, ones lots of love and affection. and the last one is tribal methods

as much as i disagree with an awful lot that i heard about the show last night this comment i'm afraid is true

now what i mean by that is ..my husband works away for a month at a time(and most husbands etc are at work before school anyway) so like many i do the majority of the parenting on my own,.now its all good and well with your first child to get a routine that suits the baby , but for example when i had my third i had two older kids to get up and ready for school in the morning so the baby had to FIT in with us , he was never mistreated or ignored but i would have to wake him in the morn , feed and change him then would put him in his bouncer (which he wasn't always impressed with) but i kept talking away so he knew i was still around and got on with gettting the others organised.... the wee soul would have liked to have slept later and no doubt would have taken a better feed if id let him but i couldn't let him change all off our lives as the kids couldn't get themselves to school , he settled in well and i don't think this was cruel

[nightowl]

I watched the programme last night and my heart was breaking for the "Truby King" mother. If this rigid regime is going to last for three months, what a lot she is going to miss out on (and she'll know it, having an older child). When my children were new babies, I remember just holding them and watching them with wonder, not just when they were fretting or tired, but when they were sleeping, full, after a feed, or awake and gurgling. All the wee baby expressions and noises, and oh, the fine downy hair. This all changes so quickly. It's time she'll never have again or be able to replace. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for developing routines, but to deprive yourself and your new baby of any human contact apart from seeing to its basic needs seems unnecessarily harsh to me, and surely can only harm the natural bonding process.

[Ash]

i just dont get why some people would want this kind of advice, my wee one goes down at 7(she is 3) and sleeps til 7 next day, when she was a baby i would let her cry alittle but not for 25mins! as to leaving them outside all day, thats ridicolous, fair enough if you are with them otherwise no

[cat]

why is 7-7 the time that suits? my first never slept for 12 hours and he stopped sleeping through the day long before he was 1.
surely dads want to see their babies at some point too?

[mums angels]

why is 7-7 the time that suits? my first never slept for 12 hours and he stopped sleeping through the day long before he was 1.
surely dads want to see their babies at some point too?

7-7 (more like 8 ) suits me because they get up at the back of 7 so i feel they need 12 hours sleep so that they are refreshed for the day ahead. as for the father he works away a month at a time so its not an issue anymore for us but i remember when he used to be upset if he was home late and they were in bed so i would often try to keep them up but it made them grumpy and he'd complain about that too different things suit different people

[emszxr]

i watched this with an open mouth, especially at the '50's' mentor.
i go with some of the advice from the spock and the other mentor. i do like the sling idea although i dont think it would be practical all day. esp when cleaning out rabbits and kennels.
although i do agree with a child being in some sort of routine, i dont think starting it from day 1 is very nice, not the way she was doing it anyway. and as for the no cuddles , kisses or affection, that is just plain horrible. there is no way i would let that woman in my house.

[Ash]

im glad people agree with me, like you say every child is different, i had a routine for my wee one has a baby but it doesnt always work out, as for now she is tired by 7 after being a nursery in mornings, weekend she will stay up abit later, but only an hour really, i didnt like the mentor who had the woman constantly breastfeeding and the baby always on her, she was sleeping with the baby which can be soo dangerous!