Springwatch, now Sporranwatch

[brokencross]

Now, not only do you have have to worry if anything is worn under the kilt, and you won't just be carrying your loose change in your sporran, but you'll need the sporran's birth and death certificate as well. (those dreaded initials EU crop up in the article.)
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/6234290.stm

[justine]

Me myself not being Scottish dont know if this does make a difference to scottish tradition...Can you let me know.http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/6234290.stm

[Ricco]

So, if I find a badger killed by a truck does that constitute it being killed lawfully? Can I still claim it as useable since it was road kill?





Waste not, want not.

[justine]

that was my question. What happens if someone goes round where the badgers are and picks up shedd fur....The badger is still alive and well, how is a man to proove that he picked up the fur from the floor, or somethat may have got snagged ona wire fence......

Does a sporran have to be made out of real fur or can they be made out of man made material. I know they can come in leather, but i did not realise that they were made from badger fur..Do they use any other animals in the production of sporrans...

[gollach]

Sporrans normally have leather in them, such as the back of the sporran (which in not furry) and also the belt. As for fur, I think that seal skin is the most common these days although the over-the-top white fluffy ones must be made with something like rabbit fur, I suppose.

[Tubthumper]

My sporran's illegal, Oh dear-deary me!
I just bought it off an old manny you see
Assured me he'd walloped it with a meat cleaver
I haven't got license, so what if it's beaver?

It could be a stoat or perhaps just a weasel
How to recognise each? Let me pull out my easel
A weasel is weasilly recognised see?
But a stoat is just stoatally different, tee-hee?

A badger would give me some pain were it that
But even more painful if it were of rat
Of mouses skinned many, or even of mice
Wee tails hanging down: awww isn't that nice!

It may be that sporran's from long golden locks
Of proud mountain lion, (smells more like a fox)
It has quite a spacious wee pocket it's true
So maybe my sporran's made from kangaroo

Of lion, of tiger, of pussycat friend
My regalia perhaps led to little pet's end
I'd be quite depressed, sure far down in the pits
If I knew the source of those wee dangly bits

Maybe from a horse, or perhaps from a goat
Was subtracted material forming said coat
I don't know from what was material sold
I can only just hope the poor beast wasn't cold

Now if I am staggering night-time to home
In the countryside, where the big wildcat doth roam
I hope that no frostbitten pussy attack
Is sprung upon me when he wants to claim back

His coat, now my sporran; in ensuing fight
I might lose much more that is wildcat's right
In revenge for removal of coat for my kilt
Leave me missing key bits and a lot of blood spilt

I've always been 'gainst vivisection it's true
But about sporran making, I just never knew
So now I must get license for uniform
Or maybe rebel, and cause beasty-skin storm

I know not of sporran-source, what must I do
Should I send the poor creature to Edinburgh zoo?
I've got to admit it all seems pretty daft
Perhaps clever vets there could do a skin-graft

And restore my wee pouch to its rightful home
Upon some proud antelope 'cross plains to roam
A beast that has suffered some awful affliction
Ending up with my sporran held on by some stitchin'

[justine]

thanks for that...I really enjoyed that.Did you make that one yourself or is it an existing poem.....Clever one....Answers all my questions...

[Kenn]

Great Tubthumper!
It was mentioned that The Scottish Executive has NO itention of checking existing sporrans so I think ye're dangly bits are safe for the moment.

[Liz]

Tubthumper your poem is brilliant!!!!