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golach
27-Jan-04, 23:35
The Virtues of Whisky
extract from Rapael Hollinshed Chronicles 1577

He distinquisheth three sortes thereof, Simplex, Composita, Perfectissima

Beying moderately taken, sayeth he, it cutteth fleume, it abandoneth melencholie, it relisheth the haste, it lighteneth the mynd, it quickeneth the spirits, it cureth the hydropsie, it healeth the stranguary, it pounceth the stone, it repelleth the gravel, it puffeth away ventositie, it kepyth and perserveth the hed from whirling, the eyes from dazelying, the tongue from lisping, the mouthe from snafflying, the teeth from chatterying, the throte from rattlying, the weasan from stieflying, the stomach from womblying, the harte from swellying, the bellie from wirtching, the guts from rumblying, the hands from shiverying, the sinews from shrinkying, the veynes from crumplying the bones from akying, the marrow from soakying,
And truly it is a soveraign liquor if it be orderlie taked

I liketh is
Golach

htwood
28-Jan-04, 01:27
Golach mate, the key to this lovely bit of Scots prose is the very last line.

"And truly it is a soveraign liquor if it be orderlie taked"

Who is lyin in the gutter on Sunday morn because they couldnt "orderly take"?
Too many, that's who.

Kenn
03-Feb-04, 00:02
Beautiful bit of prose. Did the author think to mention what dosage? I guess not so it's back to finding the perfect measure to ensure eternal life. :p

marion
20-Feb-04, 03:39
Sounds good. When you find the perfect measure be sure to post it.