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Emms
24-Dec-06, 00:24
I have previously posted that I was not particularly in the 'festive mood' - but how things can change!.

Christmas, this year, was just something that everyone else was talking about and even although I tried hard to 'take part' for the sake of my family, my heart was never really in it. The reasons for this?; my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer and not wanting us to see him suffering in his last days, he simply walked out - vanished into thin air with no trace since. No sightings and no body and no way for us to move on. This has had a tremendous impact upon my family. My mother has gone to South Africa to be with friiends and my sister has gone to Hawaii (with her 6 year old daughter) to work. I felt that I was left behind - just waiting incase there was some news of my father. Then my best friend was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer, and three weeks ago, following a dodgy mammogram and dodgy ultrasound, I was told that I may have breast cancer. I was also diagnosed with fibroids and am having an operation at the end of January 2007 to remove them. Festive season? ---- forget it.

Then yesterday morning Murrayfield hospital phoned and said I had Fibroidenoma and not cancer, which was a relief. Within a couple of hours my two daughters arrived with M&S bags stuffed with food and informed me that, as I was working Christmas day, we were going to celebrate it early. They set up the table, cooked the food, told endless jokes, poured endless drinks and said 'having fun is compulsory not an optional extra'. How right they were.

Although there were many empty seats around our table this year (and I couldn't help shedding a tear for the people who could not be with me to celibrate), I suddenly realised that my two daughters,who are 23 and 20, were hurting too. Yet they had arranged Christmas dinner at the drop of a hat - the only way they could demonstrate that we need to stand united as a family. That they love me and need me and I need to be there for them as much as they are for me. 2006 has been awful but 2007 WILL be better.

I have spent the year grieving for what I have lost, rather than appreciating what I still have. Thank-you junior Emms 1 and 2 for giving me a reality check and for making me look foreward to 2007 - whatever that may hold.

And thank you orgers for offering friendship and good wishes throughout my troubles. I have had the most wonderful christmas day and I hope that each and every one of you can have an equally good family-oriented day. Sometimes you have to experience the 'lows' before you can appreciate the 'highs' - what a lesson to be taught by your children. Thanks girls.

Fran
24-Dec-06, 01:05
Emms, I was so sad for you when i read your post, but i am so happy that you enjoyed your "christmas day" with your two daughters, who so obviously love you and care for you very much. I think christmas is always a "sad" time as well when we remember friends we loved and lost. My Father died near christmas, and last year my lovely neighbour/friend just dropped dead before christmas. It was a terrible year, all my friends died of cancer one after the other. i will always remember them at this time as christmas is time for family and friends together.
Its great that you do not have cancer, what a lovely christmas present for you to know that now, and good luck with your operation.
as for your father, how awful for you, i wish you could hear from him to know he is ok. is there no way you can find out about him, through his doctor,hospital, social security and pensions office etc? I do hope you get good news.i hope he suddenly turns up at your doorstep for christmas.
You'll be missing your mum...i'm lucky mine has actually come up to caithness to have christmas with me, the first time in a few years. I do feel for you.
Hope you have a nice christmas all considering, and a very happy and healthy 2007 with good news about your father. xx

highlander
24-Dec-06, 01:15
Emms, I am finding it hard to put into words what i have just read, im sure many people who read this can relate to the sadness they have also gone threw, at christmas its such a special time to be with our familys, and the media gived this false image "Happy familys opening thier xmas presents by a tree, then everyone around a table enjoying thier christmas dinner" I have read over and over what you have typed, and felt so many emotions, but i also felt there was a beginning of the story, a middle, and was so glad to read the very happy ending, from my own experience i have found what we have had, and do have, is very special and now you have to turn the page because there is another chapter, you have two very special daughters who have made sure you have been looked after in what must have been a distressing time, but if one lesson in life, that everyone should take from this, enjoy your time, with your familys, and sometimes even the simple things in life will make you laugh.

Gogglebox
24-Dec-06, 01:45
It proves the org is a great medium and support
In a way a mass samaritans giving all sorts of opinions - -some good, some not so but worth a read and sometimes a laugh

As i said previously Best Wishes and the very best of health for 2007

crayola
24-Dec-06, 03:04
Inspiring words Emms. I feel humbled.

Margaret M.
24-Dec-06, 03:27
Emms, good for you for having such a positive attitude and finding reasons to celebrate amidst the challenges you are facing. Merry Christmas and I hope 2007 smiles on you.

Royster1911
24-Dec-06, 11:27
I`m in tears Emms. Have a good one. xxx