On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"
To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
Two mermaid detectives are trying to solve the murder of one of the great Blue Whales that used to swim in the ocean.
The seal forensics came in to check out all the DNA,but all the evidence never came to anything.
P.C Spongebob Squarepants comes in and says,"Aye theres definetely something fishy about this case!!!!!!!"
Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho
On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"
To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"
LOL!Originally Posted by angela5
Hee-heeOriginally Posted by angela5
Guy walks into the doctor with jelly,cream and hundreds & thousands sticking out of one ear.
The doctor says"Can I help you?"
The guy says,"Can you speak up a bit,I'm a trifle deaf!!!!!!"
Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho
LOLOriginally Posted by Cedric
Cedric, that is truly dire!
Are you trying to kill off the remaining orgers??
A gigantic hole 6ft wide by 8ft deep suddenly appeared in the road. The local council was mystified by the discovery.
The police are looking into it.
A 1991 Gallup survey indicated that 49 percent of Americans didn't know that white bread is made from wheat.
Cheers Saveman,I aim to please!!!!!!!!
Dire............
An old popstar is walking through the town,not the dapper young guy he used to be,but looking more like a tramp.
Two guys see him and one asks was that guy in The Kinks?
"Naw,"says the other one,"He's in Dire Straits!!!!!!!"
Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho
The jokemeisters in the house!!!!!!!!!Originally Posted by 2little2late
Whats round and white and is that clean its hole smells of mint?
A polo mint......ah!!!!clean joke that.......
Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho
By the time Dave pulled into the small town every hotel room was taken. He finally pulled up to the very last hotel and went into the office. "You've got to have a room somewhere" he pleaded." -- Or just a bed - I don't care where." "Well, I do have a double room with one occupant," admitted the manager," and he might be glad to split the cost. But to tell you the truth, he snores so loudly that people in adjoining rooms have complained in the past. I'm not sure it'd be worth it to you." "No problem," the tired travelers assured him. "I'll take it." The next morning Dave came down to breakfast bright-eyed and bushy tailed. "How'd you sleep?" asked the manager. "Never better." The manager was impressed. "No problem with the other guy snoring, then?" "Nope, I shut him up in no time" said Dave. "How'd you manage that?" asked the manager. "He was already in bed, snoring away, when I came in the room," Dave explained." I went over, gave him a kiss on the cheek, said, 'Goodnight, beautiful,' and he sat up all night watching me."
OHhhhhhhh my word........
So when are we going to bring the humour back??
Daybreak on Brokeback Mountain.
The sun was just beginning to reach the crest of Brokeback Mountain. The lingering mist was starting to burn away from the foothills as the sun's rays worked their powerful magic. Rattlesnakes were stirring from their slumber and the only sound that could be heard was the gentle whirring of the Cicadas.
Suddenly in the distance a Rooster crowed "Cock-A-Dude-'ll-Do", Two Cowboys could be heard echoing "Amen to that". Alan Ladd turned over in his grave and another day was born on Brokeback Mountain.
I've just come back from the beauty parlor! said the wife.
What a pity it was closed! replyed the husband.
Surprisingly the local nick got burgled and thieves made off with all the toilet pans.
At the moment the police have nothing to go on.
A 1991 Gallup survey indicated that 49 percent of Americans didn't know that white bread is made from wheat.
Have a go saveman..you know you want to..Originally Posted by Saveman
Originally Posted by 2little2late
LOL!
Cracker angela.Originally Posted by angela5
Bertie comes back fae the pub and says to his wife,"See that guy Archie that lives two doors up.He was bragging in the pub that he has been with every woman in the street except one."
"Aye,"says the wife,"That'll be that snobby Mrs Green across the road!!!!!"
Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho
Originally Posted by angela5
A horse walks into a bar.
The barman says, "Why the long face?"
I didn't want to laugh.....I really tried not to laugh!Originally Posted by Cedric
hee..hee...good one cedric.Originally Posted by Cedric
Bookmarks