Worst Joke Ever...

[Jeid]

This is what we'd expect from caithness.org I reckon

3 pieces of string outside a bar plotting their way of getting in.

First piece of string walks into the bar...

Barman - "We don't serve pieces of string, get the hell out!"

Second piece tries...

Barman - "I just told your little mate, NO STRING! Get out!!"

Third piece ruffles up his 'hai'r and makes a few loops round himself...

Barman - "Don't tell me you're another piece of string?!!"

String 3 - "No, I'm afraid not."

[ice box]

Must of heard that when i was about ten has to be the worst one yet lol

[Micki]

Definitely a bad joke but still made me laugh.

[knightofeth]

That was quite good - does anyone else want to share their "worst" joke?

[grantyg]

2 fish in a tank and one says - " Ho de ye ken hoo tae drive thas thing?"

Sorry I have been teaching little "Wans" in falkirk and the accent has pooluted my mind!

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

FFFFSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH

[footie chick]

whats a bees favourite book?


Bridget Drones diary

[connieb19]

Did you hear about the fire at the campsite?

It was intense!!!

[garycs]

A man cuts his foot quite badly whilst on the beach, a couple of days later it's very sore and inflamed so he decides to go to the hospital. On the way there he steps into the road and the same foot gets run over by a truck. He staggers into the casualty department and an Australian student doctor starts to examine his foot; after much deliberation the doctor says "Strewth Mate, what you've got there is a Pusfilledflattyfoot!"

[connieb19]

Mummy, Mummy...can I wear a bra, now i'm sixteen?

Shut up Albert!!!!

[ice box]

Two peanuts walk into a rowdy bar. One was assaulted. how bads that lol

[ice box]

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"

[ice box]

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So, he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, checks his teeth, etc. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Just because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really, really heavy."

[connieb19]

Two cowboys are standing in the kitchen. Which one is the real cowboy?

The one on the range!!

[ice box]

What kind of ghosts haunt chemistry faculties? Methylated Spirits.

[grantyg]

How does bob marley like his doughnuts



Wi Jammin!

[Shadow]

Lol! Great bad jokes! Hee hee!!

[connieb19]

Knock Knock!!

Whos there?

Biggish!!

Biggish who?

Sorry no Change!!....lol

[angela5]

What did one frog say to the other?
'Time's sure fun when you're having flies!'

[angela5]

A man is in bed with his wife when he hears a rat-a-tat-tat on the front door. He rolls over, looks at the clock and sees that it's three o'clock in the morning. "What idiot would be knocking at the door at this hour?" thinks the man, and he rolls over and tries to go back to sleep.
After a few minutes, there's a louder knock on the door. "Aren't you going to see who it is?" asks his wife, so the man drags himself out of bed and goes downstairs.
He opens the door to find a stranger standing outside.
"Eh mate," says the stranger, "Can you give us a push?"
"No! Get lost! It's three in the morning. I was sleeping," says the man and shuts the door.

He goes back to bed and tells his wife what happened. She says, "Remember that night when we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick up the kids from the babysitter and you had to knock on that man's door to get him to help us? What would have happened if he'd told us to 'get lost'?"

So the man gets out of bed again, gets dressed and goes downstairs. He opens the door and, not being able to see the stranger anywhere, he shouts, "Hey. Do you still want a push?"
A voice cries out, "Yes please, mate."
So, still being unable to see the stranger the man shouts, "Where are you?"
"I'm over here on the swings."

[krieve]

knock knock
whos there?
yule
yule who?
yule never guess lol