Domestic abuse.

[teddybear1873]

Because some people don't like confrontation, surely that's not a bad thing?

If a partner doesn't confront the OH over a long period of time, it will end being a bad thing.

Thats why the example you gave Rheg, the husband was at breaking point and she landed in hospital.

[cuddlepop]

Domestic Abuse Liason Officer
PC985 Katie Hunter
contact through Dornoch Police Station
01862 810 222

Mens Aid (www.mensaid.com)
0871 223 9986

Domestic Abuse helpline
0800 027 1234 - 24 oers

Thanks for posting the links to these web sites Trix.

I dont know what the answere to the "gentle Giant" that eventually snaps but I can compare it to the bullied child who eventually snaps and retailiates and there the ones that are punished.

Maybe we all need to speak out sooner to someone in authority if someones behaviour is threatening etc.

[Thumper]

Having been a victim of domestic abuse on numerous occasions I for one know that it does not have to be "provoked" it can and does come from nowhere and is the person doing the abuses way of controlling the other person! If someone is going to abuse you they will do it whether or not you have spent too much money,cooked the wrong tea,spoken to the wrong person etc-these are all just excuses for the abuser to use when the do hurt the other person!Oh and it is easy to say walk away from it-when you are terrified it isnt so easy to do though!x

[Boozeburglar]

It may well be a fact, but it is still a sweeping generalisation. Alcohol does not lead to domestic violence.

No sweeping generalisation was made.

You simply must pick holes where there are none.

Perhaps you should study the language used before you enter your remarks.

There was no suggestion alcohol consumption always causes domestic abuse.

The statistics speak for themselves; and support what Changilass said.

[Metalattakk]

No sweeping generalisation was made.

Yep there was. As I said, changi may well be right, but despite what you say there was a suggestion, and an implication that alcohol is to blame.

You simply must pick holes where there are none.

The irony of that statement is not lost on me.

[Boozeburglar]

Its just more prevelant at this time of year with the addition of alcohol.

Can you pinpoint the sweeping generalisation contained in that sentence?

I think you need to do some further reading.

[Metalattakk]

*sigh*

I'm allowed my opinion, and in my opinion there was indeed a sweeping generalisation made, if not directly then certainly implied.

Now stop trying to provoke an argument.

[teddybear1873]

*sigh*

I'm allowed my opinion, and in my opinion there was indeed a sweeping generalisation made, if not directly then certainly implied.

Now stop trying to provoke an argument.

Thats the pot calling the kettle black.

[Boozeburglar]

Facets of language are not subjective matters of opinion; they are the building blocks of reasonable debate.

For one who so frequently delights in semantic debate, you are very stubborn in accepting this glaring error in your use of language.

[Metalattakk]

Thats the pot calling the kettle black.

That is, of course, your opinion. Well done. And right back at ya, by the way.

Facets of language are not subjective matters of opinion; they are the building blocks of reasonable debate.

For one who so frequently delights in semantic debate, you are very stubborn in accepting this glaring error in your use of language.

I accept no 'glaring error' whatsoever, and why should I? As the inferrer only I have the right to the opinion that I expressed. As such, I inferred that the implication was made.

Quite what it's got to do with you, though, I have no idea.

[changilass]

Thread spoiling at its very best.

[Moira]

Oh I dunno Changi. They are keeping the thread alive and they each seem immune to the blows being delivered by the other.

All good stuff I would say.

[onecalledk]

1 in 3 women will experience domestic violence in their lifetime, fact. Domestic violence is the physical, emotional and mental abuse of another, its a crime and should treated as such.

to answer the earlier post of the example of a man who found out his wife was having an affair and "lost it", he could have walked away. I am NOT defending the wife in what she did but NO ONE deserves to be physically hit no matter what they do. Domestic abuse is more than just a slap when the spouse comes home from the pub, the mental and emotional torture leaves scars that can last a lifetime.

the figures for children being in the same room or adjacent room when an incident of domestic abuse occurs is extremely high. Domestic abuse is child abuse. Every child deserves to live a life free from mental, physical, emotional and sexual abuse. To live in a household with an abusive parent is a breach of this right.

Domestic abuse is about gender inequality and it has to be addressed by society as a whole. This is the 21st century, to have women and children terrified in their own homes is shameful.

To educate children about domestic abuse is to give them from a young age the skills needed to communicate, to show them that hitting and belittling is wrong. To show them what a RESPECTFUL and loving relationship is would go a long way to breaking the cycle of abuse.

The feminist card detracts from the issue. This is not women are better than men argument or men are better than women argument. We are all responsible for our own actions. NOTHING justifies violence.

[supernova]

Well said "onecalleddk" but where did you get the figure for 1 in 3 women being affected by domestic abuse, surely it can't really be that high, unless it means worldwide, I could understand it being more prevalent in less developed countries?

I think education will be beneficial in the long term but nowhere near as beneficial as leading by example. Children get their personality traits from their parents and if they grow up in a violent or abusive environment then that is what they will perceive as "normal". That of course does not mean that all sons of domestic abusing fathers will become abusers themselves but their is a much higher likelihood of it. Likewise, children who grow up in families where parents show respect for each other are more likely to follow their example.

[cuddlepop]

Well said "onecalleddk" but where did you get the figure for 1 in 3 women being affected by domestic abuse, surely it can't really be that high, unless it means worldwide, I could understand it being more prevalent in less developed countries?

I think education will be beneficial in the long term but nowhere near as beneficial as leading by example. Children get their personality traits from their parents and if they grow up in a violent or abusive environment then that is what they will perceive as "normal". That of course does not mean that all sons of domestic abusing fathers will become abusers themselves but their is a much higher likelihood of it. Likewise, children who grow up in families where parents show respect for each other are more likely to follow their example.

I still havent mastered the art of breaking down someones reply so have included all yours and would like to thank onecalleddk for a very good post.

Supernova those statistics are right and very frightening just goggle Womans Aid and you'll get info.

I too fear son will follow fathers footsteps.

[cuddlepop]

Thread spoiling at its very best.

I would have locked it if it had carried on much longer ,just hoped the boys would see themselves it was become a "point score" game.