Help please

[joe]

CAN ANY ONE HELP ME TO RETUNE MY TELLY TO MY VIDEO AS IT IS OFF THE TUNING,WILLING TO PAY SOMEONE TO DO IT THANKS

[Mr P Cannop]

hi joe could i help you ??

[joe]

Hi Paul thanks but I managed after an hour to fix it myself studied the book more.

[squidge]

how come men never ever read the instructions

[Greenrunner]

Because they are too distracted listening to them ??????

[golach]

how come men never ever read the instructions

Oh Squdge, that was below the belt

Golach

[jjc]

how come men never ever read the instructions

Because there aren't that many buttons on a VCR and pressing them all will not only give the desired result (eventually), it also lets us see what all of the wrong buttons do.

What better way to learn?

[squidge]

Well

If you have ever sat next to your husband/lover/boyfriend/father when a new peiece of equipment has arrived in the house you will know what i am talking about.

It goes like this

Female ------> sits and watches
male ------->unpacks all stuff, fits wires in what he thinks are appropriate holes and fiddles with knob
female -------> reads instructions
male ---------> swears a bit presses a few more buttons and announces that the thing wont work
female ------> says "erm darling... it says here...."
male ---------> INTERRUPTS --- shhhhhhhh I am concentrating
female ------->says " maybe you would like to read these " and passes hte instructions over
male -----> snatches them off her and gives them a cursory glance before pressing yet MORE buttons
female --------> picks it up and says "but it says here... "
male------->looks a bit closer hmms and haaas and follows instructions and hey presto it works
female-----> says "well done, would you like a cup of tea" and goes away giggling to her self cos she could have had it done 10 minutes ago but knows how important it is for his ego that he does it himself so she smiles quietly and puts the kettle on.

And you all know i am right!!!

[jjc]

Squidge,

That’s obviously the from the female viewpoint. Let me give you the other perspective:

Male -----> hears a knock at the door and jumps up excitedly to sign for new DVD recorder he has waited weeks for.
Female -----> looks on uninterested.
Male -----> opens the box and gets out all of the pieces, pausing briefly to stroke the shiniest bit a few times.
Female -----> looks on uninterested.
Male -----> tries to explain just what this new silver marvel is and why it is better than the others on the market.
Female -----> looks on uninterested.
Male -----> says, “Are you watching this because I want to plug this in? It’ll take about five minutes.”
Female -----> looks on uninterested. Doesn’t bother to answer.
Male -----> unplugs the TV and starts attaching the new cables in precisely the right places.
Female -----> looks on uninterested.
Male -----> flicks to the menu and, due to the common feel of such menus, quickly programmes the DVD recorder's date, time and TV channels.
Female -----> looks on uninterested.
Male -----> puts a blank DVD in the recorder and checks that it records.
Female -----> looks on uninterested.
Male -----> asks if female would like to watch a film on the new DVD recorder.
Female -----> doesn’t answer.
Male -----> takes that as a ‘no’ and puts the TV back on.
Female -----> sees the titles rolling for an obscure and boring documentary about feet, sighs deeply and says, “Well, that’s just great. I’ve missed the end now. I waited all week to see that.”

...and the men out there know I am right

[Anonymous]

Its a well known fact that 5 year olds can operate ANY complex bit of electronic equipment without instructions.

Women believe men to be 5 year olds.

Ergo, men can operate ANY complex bit of electronic equipment without instructions.

[lynne duncan]

Nope I agree with squidge after watching over the years. my father, husband , brother , and father-in-law all when handed or delivered or even bought for themselves any device whether electronic or otherwise. They all go through the male ritual 'as described by squidge' it is a fact of life!!

[golach]

Nope I agree with squidge after watching over the years. my father, husband , brother , and father-in-law all when handed or delivered or even bought for themselves any device whether electronic or otherwise. They all go through the male ritual 'as described by squidge' it is a fact of life!!

Well Lynne & Squidge,
the "male ritual" thinggy you go on about is just a male way on doing things,
You fluffy, sweet and wonderful girly types, just dont understand the techy and difficult side of things electrical and mechanical, except maybe steam irons and hair dryers.
But Girls have you noticed that us males always get it working in the end

Golach

[acameron]

Instructions are for wussies - Real Men can do it without prompts

(now how do I submit this message? Wheres that manual?)

[squidge]

Instructions are for wussies - Real Men can do it without prompts

Hmm

OK... how come when you wonderfully technical minded men are asked to put the washing in the washer we get a blank stare, you need written instructions on a piece of paper and a demonstration... and then you phone us and say... "where do i put the powder?" or "what button do i press?". And how many times when we have wanted the cooker turned on do we come home to dinner still uncooked inside the oven...

Its a good job we love you

[George Brims]

Two points.

In his otherwise very accurate scenario jjc said something about the "common feel of such menus" - no way. There are 3 VCRs in my house and each one is programmed completely differently. I used to laugh at people whose VCR would flash "12:00" all the time until I encountered my daughter's one.

Men don't read the instructiions because the instructions are written by idiots, very often idiots for whom English is a second language. This particularly applies to the instructions for the one mentioned above, which still isn't set to the time!

[joe]

thanks for all your comments,but sorry I am female, a busy one at that, who did'nt have the time to read the book with the other 101 things I do in a day,

[jjc]

thanks for all your comments,but sorry I am female, a busy one at that, who did'nt have the time to read the book with the other 101 things I do in a day,

What've you got to say for yourself now, Squidge???

[squidge]

What've you got to say for yourself now, Squidge???

Hmmm

I simply made several observations on men. Joe 's gender does not alter the fact that what i have said is still valid.

[Anonymous]

OK... how come when you wonderfully technical minded men are asked to put the washing in the washer we get a blank stare, you need written instructions on a piece of paper and a demonstration... and then you phone us and say... "where do i put the powder?" or "what button do i press?". And how many times when we have wanted the cooker turned on do we come home to dinner still uncooked inside the oven...

hehe, you've noticed that eh? How devious are we? Behind the blank stare is this:

"NO NO NO, NOT THE WASHING!!!! Mabee if I make out that I cant do it, she wont ask me again"

or

"c'mon dear, you know you're a better cook than I, you always complain about my cooking anyway"

Fact is that we can be bright and intelligent when we WANT to. Ask us to do anything mundane like the washing or cooking and immediately the Laundrette and the Chippy comes to mind.

And is there really an important difference between "doesn't smell" and "washed, dried, pressed and put away in the cupboard"?