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Thread: A wee joke

  1. #1
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    Default A wee joke

    A husband and his wife were sound asleep when suddenly the phone rang.

    The husband picked up the phone and said, "Hello? How the heck do I know? What do I look like, a weatherman?" He then slammed the phone down and settled into bed.

    "Who was that?" asked his wife.

    "I don't know. It was some guy who wanted to know if the coast was clear."

  2. #2
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    lmao good one angela

  3. #3
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    Default camping trip..

    Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip.

    After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night and went to sleep.

    Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up and tell me what you see."

    Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."

    "What does that tell you?"

    Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why, what does it tell YOU?"

    Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke.

    "Watson, you idiot. Some nutter has stolen our tent."

  4. #4
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    Default Riddle

    I have holes on the top and bottom. I have holes on my left and on my right. And I have holes in the middle, yet I still hold water. What am I?

  5. #5
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    A shirt that has just came oot a washing machine!!!
    Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cedric
    A shirt that has just came oot a washing machine!!!
    Good try Cedric

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by angela5
    I have holes on the top and bottom. I have holes on my left and on my right. And I have holes in the middle, yet I still hold water. What am I?
    human

  8. #8
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    Good try icebox
    Keep trying....

  9. #9
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    A pair of old swimming trunks
    Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho

  10. #10

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    come on with the answer angela!! I canna go till my bed until I know...lol
    Don't wrestle with pigs, you just get all dirty and the pig enjoys it.

  11. #11
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    is it a sponge

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cedric
    A pair of old swimming trunks
    Has the moths been at your trunks then cedric

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by ice box
    is it a sponge

    Yipee! icebox thats correct..

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by connieb19
    come on with the answer angela!! I canna go till my bed until I know...lol
    Aww! sorry connie i was keeping you up i was waiting for someone to guess..

  15. #15

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    Well Done icebox...is your grandad still there...lol
    Don't wrestle with pigs, you just get all dirty and the pig enjoys it.

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by connieb19
    Well Done icebox...is your grandad still there...lol
    no he is off to his bed thought of that one all my self lol

  17. #17
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    A sponge......but would it no go soggy wi' the water and the icing and hundreds o' thousands would drip off and I'll no mention the cherry!!!!
    Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho

  18. #18
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    He is one for yae all
    .I have four wings, but cannot fly, I never laugh and never cry; On the same spot I'm always found, toiling away with little sound. What am I?

  19. #19
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    Two cows are in a field. Which one is on holiday?
























    The one with the wee calf.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by ice box
    He is one for yae all
    .I have four wings, but cannot fly, I never laugh and never cry; On the same spot I'm always found, toiling away with little sound. What am I?


    well icebox what's eh answer then

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