A guy is driving around the "back of Burke" when he sees a sign in front of a broken down tin roof house: "Talking Dog for Sale"

He rings the bell, and the owner appears and tells him the dog is in the backyard.

The bloke goes into the back yard and sees a nice looking Labrador retriever sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says "So, what's your story?"

The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told ASIO, and they had me sworn into the toughest branch of the armed services ... the SAS.

In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one thought a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running, but the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger. So, I decided to settle down.

I retired from the Army (8 dog years is 56 Army years) and signed up for a job at airports to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a crop of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The bloke is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

"Ten dollars," the bloke says.

"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's so full of bullshit," answers the man. "He never did any of that stuff. He was in the Navy!"
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