Strictly Germ Proof

[trinkie]

Strictly Germ Proof by Arthur Guiterman.


The Antiseptic Baby and the Prophylactic Pup
Were playing in the garden when the Bunny gamboled up
They looked upon the Creature with a loathing undisguised -
It wasn't Disinfected and it wasn't Sterilized.

They said it was a Microbe and a Hotbed of Disease
They steamed it in a vapor of a thousand-odd degrees
They froze it in a freezer that was cold as Banished Hope
And washed it in permanganate with carbolated soap.

In sulphurated hydrogen they steeped its wiggly ears,
They trimmed its frisky whiskers with a pair of hard-boiled shears,
They donned their rubber mittens and they took it by the hand
And elected it a member of the Fumigated Band.

There's not a Micrococcus in the garden where they play;
They bathe in pure iodoform a dozen times a day;
And each imbibes his rations from a Hygienic Cup -
The Bunny and the Baby and the Prophylactic Pup.