Warning - by Jenny Joseph

[Moira]

Dedicated to some of the Chatroom regulars, who were reminiscing here tonight. I didn't have a clue what they were on about

Warning
by Jenny Joseph

Warning

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandles and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practise a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

Jenny Joseph

[Torvaig]

Moira, I think purple will suit you! You'll have to start "The Red Hat Club" for other eccentrics like yourself and won't it be wonderful not to worry about what other people say?

There is a "Red Hat Club" in Halifax, Nova Scotia and yes, they do all wear red hats and go out and have great fun!

[Angela]

I had a great Russian teacher at school in the 60s- she'd come to Scotland as a refugee long ago.
She was in her eighties and wore purple skinny ribs, very bright lipstick & lots of jewellery and we all thought she was amazing!

[Moira]

Moira, I think purple will suit you! You'll have to start "The Red Hat Club" for other eccentrics like yourself ....

Thanks Torvaig - sounds like you know too much about me - now I may have to kill you

I had a great Russian teacher at school in the 60s ......
She was in her eighties and wore purple skinny ribs, very bright lipstick & lots of jewellery and we all thought she was amazing!

Angela - your teacher sounds amazing - certainly very different from the teachers I remember. Maybe she was the founder member of the "Red Hat Club"

[Kenn]

We will have no problems recognising each other Moira especially with the rainbow leg warmers and the tiger slippers!
What a wonderful poem throrougly enjoyed that one.

[Angela]

Maybe you know this....Warning, the poem, comes as a little hardback book (£4.99, cheaper from Amazon) and makes a really nice present, I think, very easy to post as well

There are some others in a similar vein, but I like Warning best.

BTW, I have sheep (not tiger) slippers...will that count, I wonder?

[Moira]

Angela - thanks - I didn't know that actually - I can see I need to do a little more research here before I find all the answers!

Of course your sheep slippers count - I wear "mules" at the moment - they don't go soggy when you nip out to the bin in the rain