mother in law

[Billy Boy]

My mother in law is banned internationally from playing poker,

as she keeps all the chips on her shoulder!


Why do they bury mothers-in-law 18 feet down, when everyone else is buried 6 feet down?

Because, deep down, they really are very nice people.

[Cedric Farthsbottom III]

........brill!!!!!

Whats the difference between a mother-in-law and a grizzly bear?

Both rip you in shreds but at least the bear disnae effect yer hearing!!!!

[Billy Boy]

There was a knock at the door, I new it was the mother in law because all the mice were throwing themselves on the traps.


saw the mother inlaw Walking down the path so i jumped from behind the garage and shouted BOO! She said you nearly frightened me to death, so i shouted BOO! BOO! BOO!


My mother inlaw said 'one day i will dance on your grave' i said i hope you do, i will be buried at sea.


only a face a mother could love(a bit like mine)

[angela5]

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in- law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her. The wife cried, "What are we going to do?"

"Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."

[Billy Boy]

A couple was going out for the evening. They had gotten ready, all dolled up, cat put out, etc. The taxi arrived, and as the couple walked out the door, the cat shot back in. They didn't want the cat shut in the house, so the wife went out to the taxi while the husband went upstairs to chase the cat out.
The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explained to the taxi driver, "He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."
A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long," he said. "Stupid old thing was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out!"

[Billy Boy]

Q: What is the punishment for bigamy?
A: Two mothers-in-law.


Q: What do you call a blonde mother-in-law?
A: An air bag.