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Thread: Humorous Gravestone Epitaphs

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    1,350

    Default Humorous Gravestone Epitaphs

    Here lies
    Ezekial Aikle
    Age 102
    The Good
    Die Young.


    Anna Wallace
    The children of Israel wanted bread
    And the Lord sent them manna,
    Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
    And the Devil sent him Anna.

    Here lies
    Johnny Yeast
    Pardon me
    For not rising.


    Here lies the body
    of Jonathan Blake
    Stepped on the gas
    Instead of the brake.

    Here lays Butch,
    We planted him raw.
    He was quick on the trigger,
    But slow on the draw.


    Sir John Strange
    Here lies an honest lawyer,
    And that is Strange.

    "I told you I was sick!"


    In Memory of Beza Wood
    Departed this life
    Nov. 2, 1837
    Aged 45 yrs.
    Here lies one Wood
    Enclosed in wood
    One Wood
    Within another.
    The outer wood
    Is very good:
    We cannot praise
    The other.

    Here lies an Atheist
    All dressed up
    And no place to go.


    Here lies the body
    Of Margaret Bent
    She kicked up her heels
    And away she went.

    At least I know where he's sleeping tonight!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Out of Caithness... sadly
    Posts
    2,772

    Default

    I died,
    They cried,
    I lied,
    There was no money.
    "Step sideways, pause and study those around you. You will learn a great deal."

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    1,350

    Default

    Here lies Boghead amang the dead
    In hopes to get salvation;
    But if such as he in Heav'n may be,
    Then welcome, hail! damnation.

    Robert Burns...

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    a long time ago in a galaxy far away
    Posts
    817

    Default

    here lies johnny yeast
    pardon me for not rising


    that one is a cracker pultneytooner. cant stop laughing.
    no amount of darkness can drive out darkness
    only light can do that.

  5. #5

    Default

    Wherever you are, wherever you be,
    Be sure to let your wind go free,
    For keeping mine was the death of me.


    "A family tree can wither if nobody tends it's roots"

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    The last house
    Posts
    2,785

    Default

    Spinster postmistress...... "Returned Unopened".
    In the image of God? You must be joking!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    2,105

    Default

    Solomon Peas.
    Peas is not here,
    Only the pod.
    Peas shelled out,
    Went home to God

  8. #8

    Default

    I think it is Spike Milligan who either has or wrote about having

    "I told you it was serious"

    on his head stone

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Posts
    3,534

    Default

    "Humourous Epitaphs?, Over my Dead Body!!"

  10. #10

    Default

    Here lies the body
    Of Margaret Bent
    She kicked up her heels
    And away she went.
    Don't wrestle with pigs, you just get all dirty and the pig enjoys it.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Wick,Caithness,Scotland,The World
    Posts
    2,269

    Default

    Cedric Farthsbottom III

    Fell asleep at 81
    Sitting on the loo
    One big curry too many
    Oh it is so true

    R.I.P
    Their coming to take me away.....haha-hee-hee-ho-ho

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