Mid week Joke for ye

[willowbankbear]

Little Barry came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.

His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell

his mother what he wanted: "Mum, I want a bike for my birthday."

Little Barry was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble

at school and at home. Barry's mother asked him if he thought he

deserved to get a bike for his birthday. Little Barry, of course,

thought he did. Barry's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him

to reflect on his

behaviour over the last year, and write a letter to God, and tell him

why he deserved a bike for his birthday.

Little Barry stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write

God a letter.



Dear God,

I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my

birthday. I want a red one.

Your friend, Barry.



Barry knew this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this

year, so he tore up he letter and started over.



Dear God,

This is your friend Barry. I have been a pretty good boy this year,

and I would like a red bike for my birthday.

Thank you,

Barry.



Barry knew this wasn't true either. He tore up the letter and started

again.



Dear God,

I have been an OK boy this year and I would really like a red bike for



my birthday. Your friend,

Barry.



Barry knew he could not send this letter to God either. Barry was

very upset. He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go to

church. Barry's mother thought her plan had worked because Barry

looked very

sad. "Just be home in time for dinner," his mother said.

Barry walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. He

looked around to see if anyone was there. He picked up a statue of

the Virgin Mary, He slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the

church, down the street, into his house, and up to his room.

He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a

pen.



Barry began to write his letter to God.



I'VE GOT YOUR MUM.

IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN,

SEND THE BIKE.

[sassylass]

lol now that's a funny joke

[brokencross]

The Scottish Lad
A young Scottish lad and a young Scottish lass are holding hands and gazing out over a beautiful Loch. After a few minutes, the girl says to the boy, "A penny for your thoughts, Angus."

"I was thinkin' ... perhaps it's time we had a wee cuddle."

Blushing, the girl leans over and cuddles him. He once again stares into the distance.

After a while, the girl says, "Another penny for your thoughts, Angus."

"I was thinkin' ... perhaps it's about time for a wee kiss."

She leans over and pecks him lightly on the cheek.

There's another long silence before the girl speaks, "Another penny for your thoughts, Angus."

"I was thinkin' ... perhaps it's about time I put ma hand on your leg."

Shyly, she puts his hand on her knee.

At this point, she notices him very deep in thought and says, "Angus, another penny for you thoughts."

"Well now," he frowns, "Ma thoughts are much more serious this time."

"Really?" whispers the girl, biting her lip in anticipation.

"Aye," he says, "Isn't it about time you paid me the first three pennies?"