Sonnets

[trinkie]

Quite lovely ! Well done clever you.
May I add that to my collection please?

Regards
Trinkie

[Gleber2]

On Future Time.

What does the future hold for all mankind,
Assuming that a future still remains,
And as the years roll by what will we find,
For us the ways of war are deep ingrained.

In every corner of Earth's blighted lands,
The violent ways of man still lead to death,
Tis said our future lies in our own hands,
Will it be long before man's final breath.

If we could change the way we live this life,
We could perhaps create a future world,
Where man could live in love instead of strife,
Where flags of war need never be unfurled.

Yet hope eternal springs in this man's breast,
The hope that we can pass the final test.


2003

[Saveman]

Quite lovely ! Well done clever you.
May I add that to my collection please?

Regards
Trinkie

Please do!

[Saveman]

On Future Time.

What does the future hold for all mankind,
Assuming that a future still remains,
And as the years roll by what will we find,
For us the ways of war are deep ingrained.

In every corner of Earth's blighted lands,
The violent ways of man still lead to death,
Tis said our future lies in our own hands,
Will it be long before man's final breath.

If we could change the way we live this life,
We could perhaps create a future world,
Where man could live in love instead of strife,
Where flags of war need never be unfurled.

Yet hope eternal springs in this man's breast,
The hope that we can pass the final test.


2003

Wow! Now that is how to do it!

[Gleber2]

On Wind.

Soft gentle breezes blow across the sand,
Sweet smelling breaths of swelling oceans fade,
Containing hints of promises not yet made,
Which vocal seabirds bear across the land.
But then the wind mage waves his magic wand'
And sets the trees abending in the glade,
Where howling wind now cuts like shiny blade,
As if the Gods had something evil planned.

But soon the wind will die and sunshine come,
The rolling surf returns to gentle swell,
The trees survive and grow bright green again,
But who can tell me where the wind comes from,
And which magician cast the evil spell,
To summon up, once more, the hurricane.


2003

[Saveman]

Great stuff!

[Sporran]

You are both very welcome. Thank you for your kind comments.

I'd like to see more of your work Sporran and Gleber2......and anyone else who wants to join in.....

Glad to see Gleber2 has added two more sonnets - it's been a while! As for me, I shall have to get my thinking cap on again.....

[Jeemag_USA]

I'll have a go, don't laugh its a practice run

My Muckle Heid!

If through my half and weary opened eye,
I see a world that is not nearly round,
Does it mean that I can't even spy,
The other half that has not yet been found.

If through my wide and over slackened jaw,
I spill out words that make most sense to me,
Where I can speak but say nothing at all,
Should I speak less and say no more to Ye!

Should I take things upon my grizzled chin,
Or turn away and show my other cheek,
If I don't heed the taunter's mucky din,
Will I become the fool and not "the meek"

If through my nose I smell an ill met reek,
Should I retract and hide behind my beak!

[canuck]

Jeemag, teacher carries a dark red pencil when he comes to mark our work. Our assignment on this thread is "sonnets". I warn you that he is very strick on that issue, so brace yourself because the hurricane is about to blow through.

[Jeemag_USA]

Jeemag, teacher carries a dark red pencil when he comes to mark our work. Our assignment on this thread is "sonnets". I warn you that he is very strick on that issue, so brace yourself because the hurricane is about to blow through.

Good job you said that, I got a chance to correct it before the puff came in

[Gleber2]

Good job you said that, I got a chance to correct it before the puff came in

Not laughing but will blow the mess down. Teacher.

[Jeemag_USA]

Not laughing but will blow the mess down. Teacher.

Woooaa ha I got caught

[canuck]

There are several different type of sonnet, the Italian or Petrarchan, Elizabethan or Shakespearian and the Spencerian. In common is the number of lines ie 14. I will explain firstly the Elizabethan which is probably the simplest.
Fourteen lines arranged in three verses of four and the couplet at the end. The rhyme scheme is AB AB CD CD EF EF GG. The couplet is supposed to be the sting in the tail that can reverse the whole meaning of the poem.
Each line is Iambic Pentameter which means that it should scan di daa di daa di daa di daa di daa. Five feet.

Bon Chance!!!!!!!

These are the rules with which we started all those many months ago.

Each line needs five di daas, or 10 beats. When he comes back with his red pencil he will want to see five di daas per line. Sorry! I said he was tough.

[Jeemag_USA]

These are the rules with which we started all those many months ago.

Each line needs five di daas, or 10 beats. When he comes back with his red pencil he will want to see five di daas per line. Sorry! I said he was tough.

OK I get it now, I did say it was a practice run, I'll try harder next time

In lines 1,3 and 2,4 of each of first three verse do they have to ryhme.

This pattern and rythm very much reminds me of Irish Folk singing, very much.

[Jeemag_USA]

2nd Practice Run (read the rules Jeemag)

Heading West

I left my soul on yonder craggy shore,
and sailed across the ocean to the new,
to lands o' plenty ne're a man be poor,
and wilderness is dwelled in by the few.

I made my bed in Midwest's finest town,
Where red born men were cleared from the land,
I staked my claim and threw my bunnet down,
But no soul came and shook me by the hand.

So far away my loved ones are behind,
But I will not forget the love they hold,
For fear they not and they may never mind,
The son that ventured out into the cold.

It is another world you can be sure,
But they can't cage a heart thats ever pure.

PS I fixed the first one too

[canuck]

You learned too quickly! You must have known what you were doing. I sweated this stuff for days to get one to meet with teacher's approval.

Or maybe there is some kind of magical learning gene in people who compose music and write song lyrics.

[Gleber2]

Weel done Cheemack!!!!

[Jeemag_USA]

You learned too quickly! You must have known what you were doing. I sweated this stuff for days to get one to meet with teacher's approval.

Or maybe there is some kind of magical learning gene in people who compose music and write song lyrics.

Well it was the very simple di da di da explanation that did it for me. I spent a lot of time in Ireland many years ago, and I spent most of that time in pubs listening to music, and listened to a lot of vocal solos, sean-nós ("in the old style") and the Irish vocal solo and a Sonnet seem very similar but not the same, but it reminded me of the rythm, so if you use two fingers and alternate your tapping on the table almost like the clip clopping of a horse while you shape the words in your head..... bingo

Or just write a poem the way you like to write it using the shape of a sonnet and then tap it in rythm out to see if it works, if it doesn't go over the lines that don't work and add syllables until they do, thats how I fixed the first one

[Gleber2]

Well it was the very simple di da di da explanation that did it for me. I spent a lot of time in Ireland many years ago, and I spent most of that time in pubs listening to music, and listened to a lot of vocal solos, sean-nós ("in the old style") and the Irish vocal solo and a Sonnet seem very similar but not the same, but it reminded me of the rythm, so if you use two fingers and alternate your tapping on the table almost like the clip clopping of a horse while you shape the words in your head..... bingo

Or just write a poem the way you like to write it using the shape of a sonnet and then tap it in rythm out to see if it works, if it doesn't go over the lines that don't work and add syllables until they do, thats how I fixed the first one

Chings, yur a clever chiel

[Jeemag_USA]

Have you recorded any Sonnets Gleber, that would be a very interesting project, it would be nice to hear a song made up of say three vocalised sonnets, and between each sonnet repeat the rythm of the last two lines on say a tin whistle, kind of like a refrain (maybe not right terminology?). I would love to hear that, I am sure you could fill up a CD with the stuff you have written.

One of my very good friends in Ireland, Clare Horgan I know has recorded sonnets, and I will try and get in touch with here and see if she has any available online. She is a great singer, she has a sample of an irish vocal on her website, but its only a short sample and not really in Sonnet style.... http://www.clarehorgan.com/Music/An%...y%20Child).mp3