My wife came from the shower and stood in front of the mirror complaining to me that her breasts are too small..... Instead
of characteristically telling her it's not so, I uncharacteristically came up with a suggestion.

If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds." She got a piece of toilet paper and stood in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts. "How long will this take?" she asked.
"They will grow larger over a period of years," I replied.

"Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"
Without missing a beat I said "Worked for your bum didn't it?"
I am still alive, and with a great deal of therapy I may even walk soon.