Jokes from an old student ragmag

A man dashes in to a bar and says to the barman "Quick, give me a triple whisky and a double brandy before the trouble starts."
Startled the barman pours out the drinks and they are downed in seconds. "Now then, when is this trouble going to start?" said the barman.
"Right now" said the man. "I can't pay for the drinks."


The same man goes into the same bar the next day. The barman recognises him and says: "Hey you were here yesterday!"
"No, I wasn't", replied the man.
"Yes, you were."
"No, I wasn't".
"You must have a double" said the barman.
"A double brandy will do nicely then, thank you" replied the man.


A man went to the doctors and said:"Doctor! Doctor!, my family think that I am crazy."
"Why?" replied the doctor.
"Because I like sausages." Said the man.
"Nonsense" replied the doctor, "Lot's of people like sausages".
"Really" said the man. "You must come and see my collection. I've got hundreds."