Some New Year jokes

Some New Year jokes:

Why did the spoon come to the New Year party dressed as a knife?
The invitation said to look sharp.

Why is it cheaper to throw a New Year party at a haunted house?
Because the ghosts bring all the boos!

Where does Sir Lancelot go on the 31st of December night?
A knight club.

How does NASA organize the New Year event?
They planet.

How do farmers celebrate New Year?
They turnip the beets!

A drunk wakes up in jail on New Year’s Eve and asks the first police officer he sees, “Why am I here?” The cop replies, “For drinking.”
“Great!” slurs the man. “When do we start?”

Why did the skeleton go to the New Year party alone?
Because he had no body to go with.

Youth is when you're allowed to stay up for New Year's. Middle age is when you're forced to.

My New Year revolution is to never use autocorrect again.

My New Year's resolution was to drop my bad habits, but no one likes a quitter.

I'm going to be giving up aerosol deodorant in the new year. Roll on 2024.

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.

Q. What happened to the man who stole a calendar?
A. He got twelve months!