A Very Quick One Liner !!..

[cherokee]

Me and my OH were just commenting about how our cat, of 16 years of age, is always yowling, whether she wants in/out, fed/watered or just cuddled, which gets quite annoying sometimes!

I commented (after a very bad day), saying, "Its just her age, poor thing. I'm grumpy now so what'll I be like in twenty years from now!?"

His very quick response was ..........






"Divorced!!!!!" :eek::eek:


Has anyone else heard any "good" one liners recently ?

[upolian]

not a 1 liner but my mate randomly made this up so he said......

basically said to me....i can make you speak german in 2 words..

so [lol] he said to me say VANCAR really quickly....what does it sound like:roll:

clearly got to much time on his hands [lol]

[Bazeye]

I got a phone call from someone in Mumbai (or wherever) asking if they could have a word with a Meester Williamson. I said you can have two if you want, told him what to do then put the phone down.

[Invisible]

I used the classic

Mate - "It's too small" - (referring to a T-shirt I just bought him)
Me - "That's what she said"

[Stavro]

For Sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.

[bluechesse]

2 fish swam in to a wall. One looks at the other and says........ DAMN!

[riggerboy]

the wife keeps putting herself down with things like
o i`m putting on weight, and this dress makes me look fat and all the other stuff you females say when your looking for a wee bit to much attention ,anyway one day she was at it big time this is wrong that is wrong and the next is wrong with her, i eventually said to her for the love of the lord will you stop putting yourself down





thats my job,,,,



guess wht i got for my tea




hot tongue and cold shoulder