Old Mothers

[neepnipper]

Saw the lady on GMTV this morning aged 72 wanting to have a baby, she said she was a career woman and had always put it off but has decided now is the 'right' time. I thought Ben Shepherd did a good job interviewing her and asked a lot of important questions like at 82 how would she cope with a 10 year old child.

I do not have any kids and do not want any but it angered me as I thought she was an extremely selfish person, she did not have a partner to help share the trials of bringing a child up and she was appealing for an egg doner.

What do you think?

[brandy]

as the other post on young mothers.. this just takes the cake.
it is irresponsible for a 16 year old to go out and get herself preggers, but a 72 year old having a baby?
how would that even work. surely shes gone past the change of life. and all the prob. of even getting preg. would she even be able to carry a baby? if she was insane enough to try or found a dr. willing to do it.
no one would let her adopt.
at least a young mother has a chance to be able to raise a child and see it grown.
urghh... what is wrong with people these days?

[lister]

In my opinion its very selfish of her to "want" children.
Planely she's too old.
She should have thought of this 45 years ago.

[neepnipper]

Yes, she was past the change which is why she was asking for an egg doner, she said she had spent thousands on fertility treatment, as Mr Shepherd put it, does she not think these fertility clinics see how desperate (or mad?) she is and just take advantage.

[unicorn]

She chose her career over being a mother so someone should tell her straight you cannot have your cake and eat it.
Disgustingly selfish woman. [disgust]

[Vistravi]

That is way too old and hugely unselfish. She'll properly be dead or incapable by the time her child is 10. What kind of life is that for a child?

Nature can be cruel by giving children to people who are rubbish parents and put them through a terrible childhood and not giving the gift of children to people who cannot have them but would make wonderful parents.

In this woman's case nature has told her she's too old as she's gone through the change. She needs to accept that it should not happen.

since she's put having kids off due to her career untill now then she is destined to have none now

[Alice in Blunderland]

Well isn't it just tough for the old bird her eggs are well hard boiled and that's it end off. [disgust]

Mother nature sets a time limit on this for a very good reason and if she chose her career knowing that time would run out then its hard cheese.

IMHO its a shrink she needs not a gynae as shes nuts to pursue this at her time of life when its grandchildren she should be cuddling not her own rant over Im off for a glass of wine. :D

[Sandra_B]

My first child didn't come along till I was 36. Second arrived when I was 38. I've been told I shouldn't have had them as I'm too old?!?!?

No-one in their right mind should be giving fertility treatment to women in their 60's and 70's...

Anyone watching the "Older Mothers" programme on (is it channel 4) TV tonight?

[cuddlepop]

Did anyone else read about the oldest mother of twin boys dying this year from cancer.
Think she was 72 and the boys 2.

Not long after these children were born she was diagnosed with cancer.:(

[sassylass]

There are other ways she can help children without giving birth to one or adopting one at her age. She could foster one, volunteer at her local hospital, bake for the neighbourhood kiddies, the list is endless. Why would she want to put herself through pregnancy at this point? Maybe she selfishly wants 'the experience'.

[shamrock2007]

That is way wrong, totally against mother nature. I would say the best age to have kids is in your 20's 30's far fairer on you and the child. They don't want to be asked if their mother is their granny!

[neepnipper]

My mum is 69 and she is a great grandmother (I mean she is a great (as in brilliant!) gran but also a great gran, if you see what I mean!:confused

[miller30]

this is worse that young mothers, surely at their age they would know better!! obviously not.

[Cupcake]

God, i am watching this just now... Its just no right for people this old to have family, Dont think i can watch anymore!! Im in my late 20's with a lively one year old and im knackered by night time, never mind doing it in your 70's!!

[ShelleyCowie]

God, i am watching this just now... Its just no right for people this old to have family, Dont think i can watch anymore!! Im in my late 20's with a lively one year old and im knackered by night time, never mind doing it in your 70's!!

Im watching it too. It seems so un-natural. Feel bad for the kids. The mothers being so selfish. Some because of their reputatuon in India that they have to have children!

[Vistravi]

God, i am watching this just now... Its just no right for people this old to have family, Dont think i can watch anymore!! Im in my late 20's with a lively one year old and im knackered by night time, never mind doing it in your 70's!!

I saw a preview/trailer for it before it came on and that was enough for me. ugh its just not natural. that is what the menupause. natures way of telling us we are too old.

[Stefan]

There are other ways she can help children without giving birth to one or adopting one at her age. She could foster one, volunteer at her local hospital, bake for the neighbourhood kiddies, the list is endless. Why would she want to put herself through pregnancy at this point? Maybe she selfishly wants 'the experience'.

She couldn't foster.
There is an age limit on people who can foster.
Fostering is a demanding job. You also need to pass regular health checks.

It's entirely selfish to be wanting a child at her age. Even if she lives for another 18 years to bring up a child to the legal age of independence, there is a high risk that the child has to be a carer for the mother. That shouldn't be allowed.

I believe there should be a legal age limit for fertility treatment.

[squidge]

AS far as i know each clinic sets its own guidelines but they have to look at the welfare of the child.

On the other hand - imagine how hard it must be if you had never been able to have a child in your 20s 30s and by the time you hit forty say 1985 IVF was just becoming a viable option but you were too old then. Here you are hitting 60 and plenty of money, healthy and still longing for a child. It must seem like a slap in the face that its so common these days.

AS an older mum at 45 with a new baby imminent and a toddler i find my patience levels are far in excess of what they were 20 years ago. I have enjoyed my last little one with an attention to detail and a fascination with his development that I know i lacked then too. Financially more secure, I am able to make a choice about staying at home that i wasnt able to make 20 years ago so there are pluses and minuses. 72 however is a ridiculous age to be having a baby she is maybe a bit deluded.

[purplelady]

I think there is a reason why we cannot have babies after a certain age and we should not interfere with mother nature I was 36 when i had my last one and had a lot of health problems during pregnacy and that they say was due to my age so cannot imagne what a 70 yr old would go though x

[scottygirl]

My mum was 40 and my dad was 44 when I was born and it made no difference to me when I was growing up.
I now find myself growing older and due to the choices I have made in my life, with my career and the like, I have not had children. I still may choose to have children later in life but only if it happens naturally. Not about to chase something if it is not meant to be. Not a fan of the idea of IVF.
I think that my age would not be a disadvantage though.
I think there is a point at which you should perhaps accept that it would not be in the best interest of the child and 72 is, in my opinion, a little far, especially without a partner.
Each to their own though.

[grumpy1]

i had this same discussion with my o.h after watching the worlds oldest mothers the other night..he was harping on that it was disgusting that women that age should consider having kids....i however was very quick to reply although i dont agree with it...u dont hear the same argument when u hear of a 70 yr old man fathering a child...

so without seeming dim when did it become cool for the old guy but agains the laws of nature for the old woman either way the odds of the pair of them living long enough to see them grow up properly are up there with them concieving naturally..

[George Brims]

I don't think it's cool either when there are old guys fathering kids. Now obviously Daddy is not going to die in the middle of his bit of the process (well he could, and what a way to go!) but he could well die when his kid is still very young, as that woman did recently. I was 21 when I lost my Dad and that was decades too early. Imagine what it's like for a kid of 5.

[Vistravi]

i had this same discussion with my o.h after watching the worlds oldest mothers the other night..he was harping on that it was disgusting that women that age should consider having kids....i however was very quick to reply although i dont agree with it...u dont hear the same argument when u hear of a 70 yr old man fathering a child...

so without seeming dim when did it become cool for the old guy but agains the laws of nature for the old woman either way the odds of the pair of them living long enough to see them grow up properly are up there with them concieving naturally..

I agree with you G1. It is way not cool for a 70 year old man to father a child than it is for a 70 year old woman to give birth to a child. people who do that in their time of life are incredible selfish and are not thinking of the life they can give that child, only their desire to leave something of them in the world.

So if they have their way they end up leaving a child behind who is too young to go without mum or dad (having lost dad at 17, it was as george brims says decades too young to lose dad) or they end up making their child their carer which in alot of ways is worse. They take the innocence away from their child and make them grow up well before their time.

Wasn't there another woman in her 70s/80s who had a little girl who freely admitted that that wee girl would become her carer only about 2 years ago now?

[balto]

this program that was on channel 4 was nasty, not that i watched it, just the thought was bad enough, someone in their early - mid 40s fair enough but after that, dont think its right.

[pinkandglittery2]

My first child didn't come along till I was 36. Second arrived when I was 38. I've been told I shouldn't have had them as I'm too old?!?!?

No-one in their right mind should be giving fertility treatment to women in their 60's and 70's...

Anyone watching the "Older Mothers" programme on (is it channel 4) TV tonight?


I watched this programme, it was quite concerning, my mum had me when she was 42, and i had a great childhood, BUT 72??!! thats how old my mum is now and to think of her having a baby is unbelievable. its so selfish of these women, of course its sad they have missed out on motherhood but surely they should have thought about it sooner?!! what if they died and then they would be leaving a baby, in some cases with no one to look after it. The fertility clinics giving this treatment to these older ladies should be closed down.

[Bazeye]

She should get a budgie or hamster instead.

[Amy-Winehouse]

http://www.gm.tv/videos/gmtv-highlights/36334-mum-at-72.html heres the link