How do we know?

[Vistravi]

What makes us choose this person as a friend or lover and not that person?

Do we look for someone with similar ideas and thoughts as ourselves or are we looking for a friend or lover that is the opposite and the completing part of ourselves?

I myself find that in my choice of partner i have chosen someone who is similar to me but is very different in other ways. In my many firends it is a mixture. As an example two of my closest friends couldn't be more different. one of them is very much like me in the sense that we are both straight talking and to the point while my other close friend couldn't be more unlike me if she tried. she's quiet, shy and reserved where i am opinionated and never too afraid to ask questions of anyone if i wish to know the answer and never afraid to put someone back in their rightful place.

[Invisible]

That made me think of something I saw on Youtube.

Ben Loka says "Why say to someone you just met pleased to meet you, when you don't know that for sure"

I choose friends because they accept me for who I am.

[Fantoosh]

Yeah Im the same, I dont choose one type of person to make a friend as I get on with most people, but the ones I do make as close friends are the ones I know accept me for the way I am and wouldnt think any different of me for the choices I make in life. I also enjoy being around people I know dont look down on others or gossip about other people too much.

[joxville]

How do we know? A good question Vistravi

I have friends who are all different to each other but as a group we just seem to gel yet I'm the man in the middle with similar interests to them as individuals. We all have different characters, viewpoints and outlooks but underneath it all there is a respect and caring for each other. Why did we ended up as friends.......I really don't know. As far as lovers go, my ex-wife and I are complete opposites yet our relationship lasted 14 years! My most recent lover was the same character as myself, similar outlooks and as laid back as me, yet that didn't work out either. Maybe I'm the problem! [lol]

[Whitewater]

I have made many friends over the years, it depends on your interests, no matter what you hobby or work is you will always find somebody with the same outlook as yourself. I also have a few lifelong friends that I made at school and whom I don't see too often now but we have always kept in touch, initially by letter, but now email makes the world a much smaller place, we meet when we can. I have not gone out particularly to find friends, it has just happened, and I guess that is probably the way with everybody.
I didn't really choose a wife, met this girl that I liked and could talk to, was good fun to be with and accepted all my eccentricities and me hers, we were comfortable with each other and getting married just seemed a natural thing to do. Strange things friendship and love, if you go looking for it it never seems to happen.

[sweetpea]

This is a good question. I'm probably the nuttiest of all my mates, notorious for being unpredictable but then my closest friends accept me and I them, faults and all. I don't think we should look for the similarities, only the differences, makes for better reading.:)