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I have been known to eat after eights before eight O'Clock which has brought shame on my family. Confess your sins here, all will be forgiven.
Have you ever made an unearthly smell and blamed the dog?[lol]
I ate a Pot Noodle recently.........................:~( Sorry.......
I recently turned the company flag upside down on the eve of a visit from our Swiss owners....the boss threatened to sack the culprit. I kept schtum.
Someday when I feel safe I'll remove the 'private viewing only' on You Tube 'cos I video'd myself doing it. :D
My list is endless-I have to do something stupid/juvenile every day. :D
northener
14-Nov-08, 22:36
shame on my family.................... Confess your sins here, all will be forgiven.
Have you ever made an unearthly smell and blamed the dog?[lol]
Nope, I wouldn't have inflicted the shame on my dogs.
I've blamed Mrs N loads of times, though.:Razz
I ate a Pot Noodle recently.........................:~( Sorry.......
(In my defence someone tempted me.............)
northener
14-Nov-08, 22:39
Forgive me, Father TBH...for I am a muppet.
Copied off an earlier thread by me, just in case it's been missed:
It's probably reasonably safe for me to relate the following tale now:
About 3 weeks ago I was taking some lads down to Inverness. We got to Berriedale Braes and on the way down I realised that the old banger in front of us was my neighbour.
So I hung back on the way down until he had gone over the bridge and was labouriously grinding his way around the first uphill bend. A quick brief to the other guys in the car and then I pounced....
I nailed the motor hard, charged up the hill behind him with lights on full beam and hand on horn. The result was as I intended, he nearly had an heart attack, virtually stalled the car and after a couple of fluffed geachanges shot over to the left hand side so I could get past him. I booted the motor again and shot past whilst waving at the wildly gesticulating neighbour behind the wheel.
I smiled and gave him the two fingered salute as I went past only to see some furious purple faced bloke behind the wheel who I'd never seen before in my life.
Wrong car.:eek:
I was brought up as a Gentleman should be and accordingly, I sped off as fast as I could and didn't slow down until I got to the Nigg roundabout......
Nope, I wouldn't have inflicted the shame on my dogs.
I've blamed Mrs N loads of times, though.:RazzI used to do that every time I needed a scapegoat.[lol] Have you ever seen the dog blame it's owner though, I'e, make the smell, have a sniff, give you a disgusted look then walk to another part of the room?:D
I excused myself from the table at lunch today to 'powder my nose' knowing full well that I didn't even have a compact, a powder puff or anything remotely resembling one in my handbag. (Canadians please note that I have finally stopped using the term 'purse'.)
Forgive me, Father TBH...for I am a muppet.
Copied off an earlier thread by me, just in case it's been missed:
It's probably reasonably safe for me to relate the following tale now:
About 3 weeks ago I was taking some lads down to Inverness. We got to Berriedale Braes and on the way down I realised that the old banger in front of us was my neighbour.
So I hung back on the way down until he had gone over the bridge and was labouriously grinding his way around the first uphill bend. A quick brief to the other guys in the car and then I pounced....
I nailed the motor hard, charged up the hill behind him with lights on full beam and hand on horn. The result was as I intended, he nearly had an heart attack, virtually stalled the car and after a couple of fluffed geachanges shot over to the left hand side so I could get past him. I booted the motor again and shot past whilst waving at the wildly gesticulating neighbour behind the wheel.
I smiled and gave him the two fingered salute as I went past only to see some furious purple faced bloke behind the wheel who I'd never seen before in my life.
Wrong car.:eek:
I was brought up as a Gentleman should be and accordingly, I sped off as fast as I could and didn't slow down until I got to the Nigg roundabout......
You are forgiven but next time make sure one of your mates has a bloody camcorder with them.[disgust]
Ten hail Mary's and half an hours self flagellation for you my son.
northener
14-Nov-08, 23:39
.............. half an hours self flagellation for you my son.
Ooooh, I'm a lucky bunny tonight!
northener
14-Nov-08, 23:41
I used to do that every time I needed a scapegoat.[lol] Have you ever seen the dog blame it's owner though, I'e, make the smell, have a sniff, give you a disgusted look then walk to another part of the room?:D
One of our lurchers was a grand master at giving you the disgusted look....
Couple of weeks ago I approached a man in the Co-op and asked him whether we should just have baked potatos and salad for tea. I'd never seen him in my life before.
Couple of weeks ago I approached a man in the Co-op and asked him whether we should just have baked potatos and salad for tea. I'd never seen him in my life before.
Why................? :confused:)
I approached a member of staff in the card aisle in Tescos Inverness to request if she could suggest a suitable card for my dog's first birthday.
Why................? :confused:)
I was just spacing - I thought it was OH. He must have moved off and been replaced by unknown person.
ciderally
15-Nov-08, 03:46
im not telling.....you wont make me xx
My last year of high school, I was the teacher's aide for Literature class. Teacher gave an unscheduled exam on something we were supposed to have read the week before (I always read the chapters the night before the exams, you know, so it was fresh in my mind lol)
So I hand out the exams, then take my place in the last row (I'm a W, right?) and I dont know a single thing on that exam cuz I hadnt read a word. and I need to pass to graduate. So when the exam was over, I stuffed my blank paper into pocket, collected the rest of exams from every other student and put them on teacher's desk.
The next day, he told me he had lost my exam and I acted all outraged and told him I would accept a B rather than sit the exam again and get an A. I still feel badly about it, kinda sorta.
oldmarine
15-Nov-08, 21:35
My last year of high school, I was the teacher's aide for Literature class. Teacher gave an unscheduled exam on something we were supposed to have read the week before (I always read the chapters the night before the exams, you know, so it was fresh in my mind lol)
So I hand out the exams, then take my place in the last row (I'm a W, right?) and I dont know a single thing on that exam cuz I hadnt read a word. and I need to pass to graduate. So when the exam was over, I stuffed my blank paper into pocket, collected the rest of exams from every other student and put them on teacher's desk.
The next day, he told me he had lost my exam and I acted all outraged and told him I would accept a B rather than sit the exam again and get an A. I still feel badly about it, kinda sorta.
Good quick thinking for your B grade. Don't feel too badly. LOL.
I wish to confess for my sins that I have a dark side! and I secretly think that TBH is a god among men but I will never admit it![lol]
I also secretly eat pot noodles while wearing the wifes clothes and singing the belgian national anthem! Now can anyone beat that(besides joxs "secret" video which is available for download from joxinsussies.com)[lol]
northener
16-Nov-08, 13:37
............... and singing the belgian national anthem!..........
You wierdo.
You wierdo.
O Belgique, ô mère chérie,
A toi nos coeurs, à toi nos bras,
A toi notre sang, ô Patrie !
Nous le jurons tous, tu vivras !
Tu vivras toujours grande et belle
Et ton invincible unité
Aura pour devise immortelle :
Its an awesome tune up there with the likes of Steps,Sclub7 and Black lace!;)
northener
16-Nov-08, 13:57
O Belgique, ô mère chérie,
A toi nos coeurs, à toi nos bras,
A toi notre sang, ô Patrie !
Nous le jurons tous, tu vivras !
Tu vivras toujours grande et belle
Et ton invincible unité
Aura pour devise immortelle :
Err....
Belgium my sea love,
My toe is not a heart, my toe is not a bra,
Our toes never sang "O'Patrick!"
You are the jury too, you hooray!
You hooray to the incessant big bell
Who are invincible tons in unity
In some immortal device.
Jeez, that's a wierd Anthem.
Me speaka da lingo, Monsewer Poirot.....
Err....
Belgium my sea love,
My toe is not a heart, my toe is not a bra,
Our toes never sang "O'Patrick!"
You are the jury too, you hooray!
You hooray to the incessant big bell
Who are invincible tons in unity
In some immortal device.
Jeez, that's a wierd Anthem.
Me speaka da lingo, Monsewer Poirot.....
Told you it was groovy!
What other anthem has "bra" in it?
helenwyler
16-Nov-08, 14:52
Told you it was groovy!
What other anthem has "bra" in it?
The French anthem, of course :lol:. Twice!;)
In the style of Northener's...er...liberal translation:
"Ils viennent jusque dans vos bras"....They get right in yer bra.
"Conduis, soutiens nos bras vengeurs"....Lead and support our avenging bras. :D
The French anthem, of course :lol:. Twice!
In the style of Northener's...er...liberal translation:
"Ils viennent jusgue dans vos bras"....They get right in yer bra.
"Conduis, soutiens nos bras vengeurs"....Lead and support our avenging bras. :D
Wow who would have thought that our froggy friends had a sense of Humour!. I stand corrected :lol:
northener
16-Nov-08, 16:13
"Avenging bras"?:eek:
French womens lib?
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