View Full Version : Funny Local stories
Does anyone have any funny local stories they have over the years or just generally daft and ridiculous things they remember to give us all a smile.
The craziest I heard was the local sheriff giving a husband a sentence of buy your wife flowers and say sorry for assaulting her??????? I also remember someone being threatened with being charged for speeding on a pushbike!! No naming and shaming or awful stories though cos we dont want to upset anyone. Just generally sillies!
One that stick in my mind is crayola going to witch school has any one heard how she got on lol .
We'd better watch our p's and q's when we reply to Crayola@z posts. She might turn us into windmills or something.I KNOW A MAN WHO WENT INTO THE DOLE AND WHEN ASKED WHAT SORT OF JOB HE WANTED HE REPLIED THAT HE WANTED TO PLANT TROPICAL RAINFORESTS IN CAITHNESS. No jobs of course.
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 02:47
What about the bloke who put his arm in the lions cage when the circus was up in Wick. I do believe this is maybe the same man who stole the horse, come to think of it!!:)
i remember a classic family funny... my granny always made soup in the pressure cooker and before she opened it she always ran the tap over it so this day we are all sitting down to dinner and we start eating the soup and everyone is looking at each other out of the corner of their eye as much as to say somethings not right here so finally after a few mouthfulls someone pipes up.. This soup is horrible at which point everyone agrees it tastes like soap... granny is well miffed by this but agrees yes it doesn't taste right so she inspects the soup only to find when she took the lid off halfway through she has set it on a bar of soap which had stuck to the lid and proceeded to drip into the soup for about 30 mins yuck!!!!!!!!!
I also remember a time when the pressure cooker blew up and we had broth all over the kitchen roof after she made raspberry jam in it and a seed got stuck in the hole the steam came out of !!!!
I KNOW A MAN WHO WENT INTO THE DOLE AND WHEN ASKED WHAT SORT OF JOB HE WANTED HE REPLIED THAT HE WANTED TO PLANT TROPICAL RAINFORESTS IN CAITHNESS. No jobs of course.
Thats a brilliant one!!!!
What about the bloke who put his arm in the lions cage when the circus was up in Wick. I do believe this is maybe the same man who stole the horse, come to think of it!!:)
lol, it was that was funny.
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 02:51
i remember a classic family funny... my granny always made soup in the pressure cooker and before she opened it she always ran the tap over it so this day we are all sitting down to dinner and we start eating the soup and everyone is looking at each other out of the corner of their eye as much as to say somethings not right here so finally after a few mouthfulls someone pipes up.. This soup is horrible at which point everyone agrees it tastes like soap... granny is well miffed by this but agrees yes it doesn't taste right so she inspects the soup only to find when she took the lid off halfway through she has set it on a bar of soap which had stuck to the lid and proceeded to drip into the soup for about 30 mins yuck!!!!!!!!!
I also remember a time when the pressure cooker blew up and we had broth all over the kitchen roof after she made raspberry jam in it and a seed got stuck in the hole the steam came out of !!!!hahahaha........
Did he get hurt??? or was the lion a fussy eater?
i remember a classic family funny... my granny always made soup in the pressure cooker and before she opened it she always ran the tap over it so this day we are all sitting down to dinner and we start eating the soup and everyone is looking at each other out of the corner of their eye as much as to say somethings not right here so finally after a few mouthfulls someone pipes up.. This soup is horrible at which point everyone agrees it tastes like soap... granny is well miffed by this but agrees yes it doesn't taste right so she inspects the soup only to find when she took the lid off halfway through she has set it on a bar of soap which had stuck to the lid and proceeded to drip into the soup for about 30 mins yuck!!!!!!!!!
I also remember a time when the pressure cooker blew up and we had broth all over the kitchen roof after she made raspberry jam in it and a seed got stuck in the hole the steam came out of !!!!
Bit like when i forgot to put the lid on the food processer, what a mess.
Did he get hurt??? or was the lion a fussy eater?
No the lion new he was a numpty.
when i was a young chick of about 5 I always wanted curly hair, my uncle brought me a little bag of manure he had taken from the cow byre at my grandparents croft and told me if I rubbed this stuff behind my ears every night and every morning that my hair would grow curly, needless to say my mother wasn't very impressed at the whiff of me!!!!!
It was funny at the time not now when i think about it, but does anyone remember the guy who used to roll around the bignold park naked early on a Saturday evening (every saturday). that was in the 80's.
I'm in stitches here!!!!! Star I hope your uncle gets a nice hand knitted jumper from you each xmas you know the type we all got as kids that you fought to get your head into and then had to be cut out of cos your ears were tearing lol.
It's a classic family tale every christmas never lived that one down
I'm in stitches here!!!!! Star I hope your uncle gets a nice hand knitted jumper from you each xmas you know the type we all got as kids that you fought to get your head into and then had to be cut out of cos your ears were tearing lol.
I remember them too well, that sound of the knitting needles click,click used to send me running for miles.
What about the bloke who put his arm in the lions cage when the circus was up in Wick. I do believe this is maybe the same man who stole the horse, come to think of it!!:)
Yes that used to be my neighbour his name was willie tim bum . one better than that one night he came home drunk and fell a sleep and left the chip pan on and my older brother and his mate were walking past the house when they noticed the door open and smoke coming out . So they went just it caught in time to put it out so they then look for willie and found him lieing on his bed with arm cuddled round this massive cod all cuddly up like a teddy . lol it's funny about the fish bit but not about the chip pan he's lucky
They always had that bonny matching pattern and all the kids looked the same!! at the end of the week everyone would have sore ears and scratch marks everywhere the teachers must have thought we all had flees.
Yes that used to be my neighbour his name was willie tim bum . one better than that one night he came home drunk and fell a sleep and left the chip pan on and my older brother and his mate were walking past the house when they noticed the door open and smoke coming out . So they went just it caught in time to put it out so they then look for willie and found him lieing on his bed with arm cuddled round this massive cod all cuddly up like a teddy . lol it's funny about the fish bit but not about the chip pan he's lucky
haha, he used to live in a caravan in the yard in rutherford street to.
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 03:04
It was funny at the time not now when i think about it, but does anyone remember the guy who used to roll around the bignold park naked early on a Saturday evening (every saturday). that was in the 80's.tell us more......
They always had that bonny matching pattern and all the kids looked the same!! at the end of the week everyone would have sore ears and scratch marks everywhere the teachers must have thought we all had flees.
Knitting patterns ehm! i don't remember them we got any old thing made with odd balls of wool, i certainly never looked like the rest of the kids anyway.
tell us more......
What more can i say connie, he was naked rolling around signing.
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 03:09
My mum used to take all 7 of us to Elmas barbers to get our hair cut. Elma had to lock the door to keep us there. We woud all leave with exactly the same bowlie cuts!!
awwwwww I got the home haircut....... that was scary
My mum used to take all 7 of us to Elmas barbers to get our hair cut. Elma had to lock the door to keep us there. We woud all leave with exactly the same bowlie cuts!!
aye and the place stank of smoke she'd have a fag hanging out her mouth, she got carried away and did'nt no when to stop cutting your hair.
One day at work when i was young the boys said i had ring worm on the back of my neck so oh no ! what will i do one lad said get some burnt oil and rub it on that kills it so what did i do pulled out the dip stick of the fork lift and rubbed oil all over my neck not to know they was nothing there and after work i went straight from work for a hair cut but forgot about my neck until the said what is that black oily stuff on your neck what a red face i got i never lived it down to this day .
my husband used to get the home bowl cut, some seriously dodgy photos to prove it
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 03:12
aye and the place stank of smoke she'd have a fag hanging out her mouth, she got carried away and did'nt no when to stop cutting your hair.Thats right you used to come out reeking of smoke..lol
awwwwww I got the home haircut....... that was scary
My mother has a photo of the 4 of us its funny luckily i was a bald baby but my poor brothers was at the hands of the scicciors, i've never seen hair cuts like it since sqiunt fringes, long and short bits all over.:eek:
My mother has a photo of the 4 of us its funny luckily i was a bald baby but my poor brothers was at the hands of the scicciors, i've never seen hair cuts like it since sqiunt fringes, long and short bits all over.:eek:
At least it was only scissors and not a mean uncle with a bag of manure trying to give u a perm
I had awful hair as a kid it was like teased cotton wool and really fine so instead of fighting with the comb I often got descended upon with the thinning scissors!!!!! The photo's are unbelievable...
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 03:17
We used o always get knited socks for christmas..to wear with our rubber boots and we'd be delighted...lefovers from rattled down jumpers..
We used o always get knited socks for christmas..to wear with our rubber boots and we'd be delighted...lefovers from rattled down jumpers..
I remember using the knitted socks for playing in the snow we had loads of them why not!
My mum used to take all 7 of us to Elmas barbers to get our hair cut. Elma had to lock the door to keep us there. We woud all leave with exactly the same bowlie cuts!!
You think she was bad try getting hair cut at angey bains in bexley terrace he was never sober i alway came looking a fish bowl lol.
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 03:20
i remember me and my pal used to always cut, dye and perm eachothers hair.. what a disaster most of the time. I remember having orange hair for the whole school year!!
Remembers me of the time my friend and i bought home perming kits, i had to go about for months with hair that looked liked i'd had an electric shock:eek:
does anyone remember Danny Craig that had the ice cream shop in Thurso, We used to go into his shop and ask how much a 10p ice cream was and he used to go ballistic!!! you would go in and get a cone and he would say put the money there pointing to the space between the ice cream machines I remember someone put the money down and it landed in the machine even as an adult they never went back into the shop!!! he terrified us as kids but the ice cream was sooo good you always went back.
does anyone remember Danny Craig that had the ice cream shop in Thurso, We used to go into his shop and ask how much a 10p ice cream was and he used to go ballistic!!! you would go in and get a cone and he would say put the money there pointing to the space between the ice cream machines I remember someone put the money down and it landed in the machine even as an adult they never went back into the shop!!! he terrified us as kids but the ice cream was sooo good you always went back.
Was that shop still open around 1989?
yeah I think it would have been it was on the arcade i'm sure its was the shop thats now allsorts.
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 03:31
My mam and dad used to go to the bingo every sunday night in the Francis Street Club....we would phone the club about 20 tmes crying "mam, he's hitting me" or "take us home crisps", I dont know why they bothered going!!
connieb19
07-Jan-06, 03:39
I remember my mates mam used to work and my mate had to make dinner for her coming home. This day it was liver and she didn't know how to cook it. i said "i have an idea, lets phone the operator". so thats what we did. For years after that we used to phone the operator if we wanted to know anything!!
I remember a man who's twin tub washing machine leaked badly so he shifted it to outside to do his washing, anyway he went off out one day leaving the washing machine outside unaware his neighbours had called for an uplift on there knackered machine, needless to say the wrong machine was uplifted
after he complained to the council he was presented with a brand spanking new front loader.
Not all bad then
No it turned out good for him, the look on his face would of been priceless though to come home and find his washing machine gone:eek:
That would of been funny lol
Alice in Blunderland
07-Jan-06, 11:05
I should have my dad on this forum just now he has so many funny stories from the nineteen forties.One he told me which I found a hoot was when they were younger they used to have a Bignold Park bonfire (new Year I think) every year they borrowed a local farmers cart and gathered the rubbish to burn.One particular year they must have annoyed the farmer for when they asked for the cart they were told to clear off.Day after they were all sitting round their newly built bonfire when along comes the farmer with the local bobby looking for ......you guessed it his cart they all denied knowledge of its whereabouts. Turning to walk away something caught the farmers eye the look on the farmers face when he saw the handles of his lovely cart sticking out the centre of the bonfire stayed with my dad now and the memory of the thump they all got from the bobby before being made to pull apart the bonfire instant punishment dealt with on the spot no nead for a court appearance for my dad and his mates.
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