Historical Moments .. What would YOU have said?

[Lord Flasheart]

The Historical Moments thread got me thinking. If could go back in time and be the person involved would you have taken the opportunity to have said something different ??, Im thinking in a humourous vein here as it would be recorded for all time.

If I was Neil Armstrong I would have waited till I was at the bottom of the ladder, killed the camera then yelled "What on earth is that !!" cut my mike and hid round the back of the lander. I would then turn the camera back on all the while giggling like a kid imagining the consternation back on earth.

I would have loved to have been an MP when Blair was Prime Minister. I would have stood up and asked him "Would the right honourable gentleman agree that his wife looks just like Crazy Frog when she smiles ??, I propose the Countryside Beautifciation Act with the first statute being the Prime Minister keeps his wife indoors"

Robert the Bruce .. I would have stood at the head of the victorous Scots and yelled "And dont come back ye Jessies" at the retreating English. I would then turn round and a la Gene Hunt and say "Right lads, beer-o-clock, whos buying ??"

If I was Neville Chamberlian I would have held the paper up high and said "Look a signed confession that Hitler wears womens clothes and likes to be called Adolphine .. and he shaves his legs !!" then stare intently at it and say "And the last bit says his moustache is false and actually a pet slug called Hermann"

If I was Guy Fawkes I would have said, just as the rope was being put round my neck, "You know in years to come you'll wish I had got away with it .. Idiots."

If I was Jesus I would have sandals renamed "Adidas Nazareth", imagine the copyright income for the church !!

[scorrie]

Just as Julius Caesar is stabbed in the back he turns around to see none other than Bruce Forsyth holding the dagger. Bruce utters the now immortal words:- "Knife to see you, to see you knife"

Caesar falls to the floor and with his last breath whispers "Et tu Brucie"


Edmund Hilary and Sherpa Tensing are just about to mount the summit of Everest. Edmund has a speech ready to read out, dedicating their efforts to Queen and Country. Just as he is about to take the final steps, Tensing shouts "Ha'd oan Eddie, a need til crimp wan oaf"

[fingalmacool]

When Tony Blair announced that Labour would be known from now on as New Labour, I would have said that from now on The Labour Party would be known as The Condom Party, It stands up to inflation, it protects a bunch of pricks, it halts production, and gives a false sense of security while the nation is being screwed.:confused

[northener]

Robert the Bruce .. I would have stood at the head of the victorous Scots and yelled "And dont come back ye Jessies" at the retreating English......


Flodden 1513: Northener is stood with the victorious English Army. He calls to the fleeing Scots - "Sorry chaps, what was that you said?"

[northener]

If someone had pointed out to the German High Command that the Stalingrad District Council had a "Zero tolerance policy towards unsolicited or cold callers", it would have saved the German Army a lot of trouble.......

[scorrie]

When Tony Blair announced that Labour would be known from now on as New Labour, I would have said that from now on The Labour Party would be known as The Condom Party, It stands up to inflation, it protects a bunch of pricks, it halts production, and gives a false sense of security while the nation is being screwed.:confused

Here, is that Adolph in your avatar?

[Kevin Milkins]

Monica, if I buy you some sweets do you think we could keep this between the two of us? I will throw in a new set of Knee pads.

[Lord Flasheart]

Flodden 1513: Northener is stood with the victorious English Army. He calls to the fleeing Scots - "Sorry chaps, what was that you said?"

Lord Flasheart is fleeing (or as I look at it a tactical withdrawl) and replies .. "Gotta go .. pubs open"

[Loafer]

The Historical Moments thread got me thinking. If could go back in time and be the person involved would you have taken the opportunity to have said something different ??, Im thinking in a humourous vein here as it would be recorded for all time.

If I was Neil Armstrong I would have waited till I was at the bottom of the ladder, killed the camera then yelled "What on earth is that !!" cut my mike and hid round the back of the lander. I would then turn the camera back on all the while giggling like a kid imagining the consternation back on earth.

I would have loved to have been an MP when Blair was Prime Minister. I would have stood up and asked him "Would the right honourable gentleman agree that his wife looks just like Crazy Frog when she smiles ??, I propose the Countryside Beautifciation Act with the first statute being the Prime Minister keeps his wife indoors"

Robert the Bruce .. I would have stood at the head of the victorous Scots and yelled "And dont come back ye Jessies" at the retreating English. I would then turn round and a la Gene Hunt and say "Right lads, beer-o-clock, whos buying ??"

If I was Neville Chamberlian I would have held the paper up high and said "Look a signed confession that Hitler wears womens clothes and likes to be called Adolphine .. and he shaves his legs !!" then stare intently at it and say "And the last bit says his moustache is false and actually a pet slug called Hermann"

If I was Guy Fawkes I would have said, just as the rope was being put round my neck, "You know in years to come you'll wish I had got away with it .. Idiots."

If I was Jesus I would have sandals renamed "Adidas Nazareth", imagine the copyright income for the church !!

I think you would have had a few thinks to say at the founding of the Suffragette movement Lord Flash, eh????!!!

The Loafer

[Lord Flasheart]

I think you would have had a few thinks to say at the founding of the Suffragette movement Lord Flash, eh????!!!

The Loafer

As was said in Blackadder 4 ..

"If any bird wants to chain herself to my railings and suffer-a-jet (say it quickly .. ;)) movement then she gets my vote"

Hurrah !!

[scorrie]

Is it true that, when Buzz Aldrin (Buzz Auldyin as he is now) took the steps down the lunar module and was about to put his foot down on the moon's surface to become the second human being to achieve the feat, he looked down and saw written in the moon dust three simple words:-
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MILK LEMONADE CHOCOLATE ;)

[Loafer]

As was said in Blackadder 4 ..

"If any bird wants to chain herself to my railings and suffer-a-jet (say it quickly .. ;)) movement then she gets my vote"

Hurrah !!

Without doubt the funniest quote EVER on a comedy programme. Every time I watch it I burst out in stitches!

The Loafer