View Full Version : Spoilt Kids in School
was wondering if anyone finds this a major problem or are they just assuming...I know when i first took my kids to school, some of the children were upset about being left and it did rub off on them, they usually went into school no problem but then they started to cry and misbehave...I ended up being cruel to be kind by takign them in andleaving them it soon sorted itself out, but is it going to be a problem or do you see it as some kids just prefer to be with mum and dad....
http://uk.news.yahoo.com/itn/20080322/tuk-spoiled-kids-bad-for-classroom-dba1618.html
I absolutely agree with this article. It only takes one child in a class who is mummy and daddy's angel and can do no wrong to disrupt the education of a whole class and change the behaviour of many children. I have seen one such child recently who is a little hooligan yet the mother refuses to see it and has a cheek to complain about other parents when children finally stand up to this child. I have witnessed this child hurt oter children in front of their mum and the mum turns a blind eye. I feel very sorry for the children in this class as the child constantly needs to be the centre of attention by any means. What stance can the schools take on this though?
Bad parenting affects more than the child of said parent sadly.
The problem is the parents of the spoilt children dont see their own kids misgivings..I have seem it plenty of times and i just wonder what the child will do when they reach secondary school.....many a time picking the children up from school you can see why the kids act like they do by the hello they get from mum or dad...As a parent i wish that my children who i will say are not spoilt at all, could attend school without having to watch the spoilt actions of another child...
I had a case in my own home, a friend brought there child who after alittle while decided it was time to go, starting a tantrum, my kids were watching and i had to ask for them to leave...I spoke to the child the next day and explained why i did what i did..my kids are not used to that kind of behaviour, so i could not allow it to go on, but at school it is out of our hands, All children spoilt or not are entitled to an education but at what cost to the others...Whats the answer..I dont know...
we had to take our wee one out of nursery last week as another child was hitting her and calling her names, school said there wasnt a problem, my wee one was soo emotional and confused as she didnt understand why she was hated
we had to take our wee one out of nursery last week as another child was hitting her and calling her names, school said there wasnt a problem, my wee one was soo emotional and confused as she didnt understand why she was hated
Thats terrible..Makes you wonder why the offending child was not taken out for a day or two and told why there behavior was not allowed and what it is like for the child that they are picking on...I hope your daughter has overcome this with your love and understanding...
Unfortunately this goes on right through the whole system. It tends to get worse as the kids get older. There are always kids who seem to do no wrong even if they are the cause of everything. What i also find is either your face fits or it doesn't. The faces who fit tend to be the ones with parents on the school council, pillars of the local community.
Royster1911
22-Mar-08, 16:42
Hmm, Try working in a school. Parents saying Jhonny / Jenny does no wrong. Teachers saying they do. And to cap it all, the teachers have no way of rectifying the problem child / children for fear of the parents response! There are none so blind as those who choose not to see.[disgust]
Hmm, Try working in a school. Parents saying Jhonny / Jenny does no wrong. Teachers saying they do. And to cap it all, the teachers have no way of rectifying the problem child / children for fear of the parents response! There are none so blind as those who choose not to see.[disgust]
I have worked in schools and nursery's and have seen this from both angles. You have hit the nail on the head ...The teachers have no way of rectifying the problem! And don't the kids know it! Political correctness has gone too far these days.
i was fed up of talking to the nursery and being told it wasnt a problem, then i picked the wee one up and she said the child in question tried to feed her there snack, i asked the teacher and was told no one saw this, the first thing my child said when i told her she was going to a new nursery was such and such cant hurt me now, made me wanna cry still does
i was fed up of talking to the nursery and being told it wasnt a problem, then i picked the wee one up and she said the child in question tried to feed her there snack, i asked the teacher and was told no one saw this, the first thing my child said when i told her she was going to a new nursery was such and such cant hurt me now, made me wanna cry still does
Is madness that your daughter had to go through this...But like you say what can the teachers do if the parents allow this type of behaviour..unless like me i speak to the parent...as i find it hard to watch my children standing there while some child has a tantrum....I have never been rude just open...
we told the school if something didnt change we would talk to the parents but the parents never took the child to school was always someone else, anyways my daughter is now happy in a new nursery, we have written a letter of complaint as i still feel the school could have done more
we told the school if something didnt change we would talk to the parents but the parents never took the child to school was always someone else, anyways my daughter is now happy in a new nursery, we have written a letter of complaint as i still feel the school could have done more
Makes you wonder if the said parents are embarrassed about the way they behave in public....Its easier to get someone else to take the child to school than face the music..But it does not help the child or the other kids...
Also makes me wonder if the parents see this as acceptible behaviour, i know i dont...I am glad she is happy in her new school..Now she can go for that PHD.....:lol:
I have worked in a number of high schools where spoilt brats with no real interest in learning disrupt classes so much that kids who are focussed on learning struggle to get 10 minutes of productive work during a single period, during the double periods they used to get a half decent bit of work completed in the middle, the teachers seamed to have given in to the constant disruption of the attention seeking brats, its a hit or a miss who our children get in their class from nursery to high school.
I suspect the problem is not as bad up here as further south but even here I've seen parents either ignoring their small children's bad behaviour or even encouraging it. A toddler in a pushchair sitting just inside the door of a charity shop the other day while mum looked around - child was eating very messily and dropping crumbs everywhere. Why should volunteers have to clear up? One shop even told me a mother left her children in the shop, went off somewhere else and then complained because the children wandered off.
Seems to be about taking responsibility - all children misbehave sometimes but when it's more than that you have to wonder about the parents.
Yes, I agree wholeheartedly with what is being said on this thread. I for one though have made mistakes when brining up my children and am far from a perfect parent. Both my kids are a bit spoiled and want for nothing, however I think they are pretty well adjusted, big one heading for University - attends school and is doing well. Never been in in a fight or had compaints about her. She knows right from wrong (and plays the playstation - although she doesn't like violent games). She has opinions I don't agree with but she's her own person.
A mother once spoke to me outside the primary school and told me my younger one had been hitting her child (P1 stage at that time) - I spoke to him and it was resolved - spoke to the mother again and everything was ok. I don't actually know if it happened but it had an outcome everyone was happy with. There was another incident though when (pre school) the younger one was trying to talk to a wee girl in a shop. The wee girl fell over and cried and the mother went mad accusing him of pushing her daughter and bullying her!! I saw the whole thing and that just wasn't the case, I just gathered him up and left. He was really confused as to why he was in trouble!! Sticks in my mind because I think I should've said something - but in a way who wants a stand up fight in front of kids??
There are some real "bullies" at my sons school. He has come home upset after a difficult day at school when these bullies have made him the target - however some of these kids have issues deeper than being spoiled.
however some of these kids have issues deeper than being spoiled.
You're so right, Max, "spoiling" is not always the issue.
As far as the nursery is concerned, many 3 & 4 year olds are just not developmentally ready to leave their families and be a functional member of a class. It's no-one's fault, it's just a fact. Some boys even find this hard at 5 and 6 years old. It's about us rushing our kids to grow up to quickly, not about us spoiling them.
So we do rush them anyway, even if we don't spoil them - they get labelled "naughty" aged 5, 4, or even as young as 3, and, year on year they continue to live up to this label with increasing ability!
Finally some get a diagnosis - ADHD, ASD, DCD, dyslexia - but they stay in the classroom because we have a national policy that they must. Sometimes they even get their own member of support staff to hit!
The world would be a better place if parents took real responsibility for their own kids for the first 5 or 6 years - then they might go to school aged 7 with the possibility of being able to behave and/or with a firm diagnosis if that's what they need. By 7 they might even be grateful for an education! I understand this happens in other countries like Sweden. Maybe we'd save enough money by not forcing babies under 5 into schools to actually accommodate and educate the older children!;)
pauline79
08-Apr-08, 10:23
I wonder Ash if you ever approached the school to ask for a formal meeting to address the issue, perhaps the other kids parents could also have been called in and it could have been resolved. As mention before, there is so much that the teachers cant do these days that discussion with parents to resolve any issues is often the only option. Just a thought............
I wonder Ash if you ever approached the school to ask for a formal meeting to address the issue, perhaps the other kids parents could also have been called in and it could have been resolved. As mention before, there is so much that the teachers cant do these days that discussion with parents to resolve any issues is often the only option. Just a thought............
Was wondering this myself, and also it doesnt always solve the problem by just removing your child from one school to put them to another as what will happen if the same thing happens in the new school she is at will you just keep moving from school to school?
A few months ago my son was being called names at school and a letter to the school and a formal meeting with the head teacher reolved the problem.
i have talked to the school on numerous occasions, there was another problem which im not going to post on here, but i know i have done whats best for my child
Finally some get a diagnosis - ADHD, ASD, DCD, dyslexia - but they stay in the classroom because we have a national policy that they must. Sometimes they even get their own member of support staff to hit!
Are you suggesting that these kids with genuine behavioral problems shouldnt be allowed into main stream education? They are entitled to an education and dont always fit into the neat box required by a special unit.
My son had one to one support through nursery, primary, but not high school where he is now.He certainly didnt hit his support and his behavior is nothing to do with being spoilt.
I do agree that kids are rushed to grow up too quickly and 7 would be a good age to enter education.
fingalmacool
08-Apr-08, 16:05
Sadly there are some kids that genuinely need help in the class, but they get lumped in with the kids that are just bad, "no other word for it", now there are conditions that need to be dealt with, but my own thoughts on a,d,h,d. are not in line with the bleeding heart liberals of this world I'm afraid. I think that the term a,d,h,d. was first mentioned one year after they took away the belt from schools (1988?) no doubt somebody will set me straight on this and say it was noticed in the dark ages but it still wont sway my thoughts on it, its just another pidgeon hole for parents and kids to latch onto so that they cant be blamed for their behaviour. :roll:
Sadly there are some kids that genuinely need help in the class, but they get lumped in with the kids that are just bad, "no other word for it", now there are conditions that need to be dealt with, but my own thoughts on a,d,h,d. are not in line with the bleeding heart liberals of this world I'm afraid. I think that the term a,d,h,d. was first mentioned one year after they took away the belt from schools (1988?) no doubt somebody will set me straight on this and say it was noticed in the dark ages but it still wont sway my thoughts on it, its just another pidgeon hole for parents and kids to latch onto so that they cant be blamed for their behaviour. :roll:
Parents do latch on to these terms to excuse bad behaviour, and the kids follow them very quickly.We have worked very hard with my sons behavioral problems and see a remarkable difference as do the so called profesionals, who gave little or no help.I wont except rudeness or bad behavior with any of my kids.
My last post on this came out wrong, the top was a quote from a previous post on the subject, sorry was a bit dippy for a while:roll:
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