View Full Version : Calling all Teenagers !!
Come on you lot - Wake up !!
There's a thread here about the 'dumbest things teenagers have said !!'
Get your act together and start one about the dumbest things adults have ever said ! Now that would be something !
You are not the only generation to make silly remarks - I have done it all my life.
So now's your chance, get going.
JammyDodger69
04-Dec-07, 11:25
You are not the only generation to make silly remarks - I have done it all my life.
So come on, do tell, what silly remarks are you made? ;)
I started the thread that you are talking about, and believe me it was not in any way to upset any teen....I agree us adults are worse for saying silly things without thinking and i am no exception and i hope that no offence was taken by it.....But at least you teens have an excuse. us adults dont....
JammyDodger69
04-Dec-07, 12:33
My excuse is that my mum dropped me too many times when I was wee...
Stupid thing I said was I saw a 4x4 that had electric on a badge on the side of it, and I said to my brother, look that things electric, I think he was close to slapping me for saying something so stupid.
I dont think anyone has been offended Justine - it's just a bit of good homely fun !
JammyDodger....
My worst mistake was while at a gathering talking about Architecture, only I kept saying Agriculture without realising it ! It was downhill from then on.
Typographical errors !! I've sent many letters reading
Dead Mr.... !!
Then the time I was helping another old friend to buy a dress. At last we found one which really suited her .... ''That's the one'' I said ''That will see you out !!''
Ooops.
Oh wad some power the gift to gie us, tae see oorsels as ithers see us !
trinkie, I remember once when my son, then aged about 7, was taking a silly joke that bit too far and I said "oh, for heavens' sake, don't be so childish!"
He gave me a pained kind of look and said "But, Mum, I AM a child!" :roll: :lol:
I have dropped too many clangers to count. [lol] [lol] some have been so embarassing that even now they make me cringe.
Do you remember when pay as you go phones first appeared?
There was ads showing a phone with a money slot to indicate it was pay as you go.
Someone who will remain nameless said to me "how will they get the money youve put in??" thinking you put coins in it!!!! still makes me laugh :)
Can I list some of the dumbest things adults say then? There must be a lot more adults that say dumb things than teenagers! :D ;)
Can I list some of the dumbest things adults say then? There must be a lot more adults that say dumb things than teenagers!
That's what Trinkie meant when starting this thread so let's hear them.....:)
we were watching "Titanic" the movie one day, My grans partner said something about the ship sinking at the end.. my granny said
"aww, (his name), youve just gone and spoiled the end of the film now" :lol:
I am a fairly cynical supposed adult type personage but my OH can get me to believe all sorts of nonsense if he delivers it with a straight enough face...!
Me: really!:eek:
Him:..................... Nah!:roll:
karia
Royster1911
04-Dec-07, 20:20
We had friends over for drinks. My better half (pregnant at the time) started yawning a couple of hours into the visit. Our female guest enquired if she was tired, oh no replied my wife, I was just listening to you! Cringe[lol]
We had friends over for drinks. My better half (pregnant at the time) started yawning a couple of hours into the visit. Our female guest enquired if she was tired, oh no replied my wife, I was just listening to you! Cringe
:lol::lol:... thats the kinda thing i would say! lol
well my kids just got me back..I am looking on ebay for boots for said teen and i am looking for ankle boots...I proceded to type in ankle boots with the following wide calf.....I could not understand why she was looking at me...So yes i say dumb things aswell.....
highlander
04-Dec-07, 20:55
I am very guilty of using the wrong words when describing things, or believe what i see, i was brought up in the town and did not really know the ways of the country. Here are a few of my bloomers.
Once when we had the vet out to check on a cow, i asked the vet "do cows have the same orgasims as us"? the word i meant to use was "Organisms" my husband burst out laughing, the vet looked at me with sympathy, but i was still left in the dark to what i said until we got back to the house, for years after that i would ask which vet was coming to the farm, i was just too embarrassed to face him. LOL
Ok and heres the next one, while walking past the duck pond, this duck was attacking the other one, lots of splashing about with the poor ducks head being kept under the water, i ran back to the house shouting to my hubby, come and help me get this duck out of the pond, she was getting killed, i did not give my hubby time for me to explain while he rushed pulling on his boots and ran out with me (well i was in a state) on arriving at the pond, she was still getting drowned, my poor hubby could not believe what he was seeing, not the duck getting drowned but that i did not know thats what ducks and drakes do in ponds, ok how was i to know drakes like to jump on her and hold her head under the water. LoL
alanatkie
04-Dec-07, 22:14
OMG Highlander, :lol::lol:
Lavenderblue2
05-Dec-07, 09:02
A few weeks ago when speaking to someone I said, “she has committed purgatory” the person I was speaking to burst out laughing – what I meant to say was, “she has committed perjury” – I was so embarrassed - that was a severe case of the ‘malaprops’!!:confused
LB
Things my mother has said:
Get the broom and broom it up.
They haven't stuck the stewards in their seats yet.
Those are just a few that I can remember just now but shouldn't we start a thread regarding things we women have done while suffering PMT? Would make interesting reading.
A friend and I were having a couple of pints in Dominos when the Pet Shop Boys were being played. The song was You Were Always on My Mind. With a grunt of disgust my mate declared "If Elvis were alive and listening to that, he would be turning in his grave!!"
A friend told me that while watching a film with his family, someone commented how sad it was that the star was now dead.
After a few moments his mother said "Ah doot he mustu've made this yin afore he deed".
My kids used to like the Rolo adverts, especially the one with the kangaroo (the boys have fallen into the old quarry? how did that happen skippy?) and after having seen it several times, my wife proclaimed triumphantly "It was the kangaroo that did it, wasn't it?".
A bloke I worked with was the master of malapropisms, some of the ones I can remember being attributed to him are:
You better make sure that's right for he will go through it with a fine toothbrush.
I want to come back as a Koala Bear. All they do is sit in a tree eating anaglypta leaves all day.
The police had to throw an accordion round the street.
and during a heated discussion....
There's no need to take a hemorrhage instead of no need to take umbrage.
young_fishin_neep
05-Dec-07, 19:06
me and mum put a cabinet together today, you can imagine everything that happened. it did say on the instructions that it should be done by a professional. i asked mum if two of us was good enough. also i was following the instructions (pictures for me im so simple minded) and we got to the last bits and i decided my side was wrong then it wasnt then it was then i didnt know anymore it turned out everything was fine and the new cabinet looks great in the kitchen lets hope it lasts and doesnt tople over in the middle of the night!
im the blondest person i know!!!
when i was 17 i raised money for scbu in inverness, with help from the fire brigade, i got my pic taken with a big cheque, when i went home i asked my mum if i had to take that huge cheque on the train, didnt know it was just for the pic:lol:
I just asked my son to change a light bulb for me as I couldnt reach it,he happily obliged,he shouted down to me...."Mum I cant change this lightbulb" I asked why and he said...."Everytime I try to put it in it lights up and it's hot!" to which I replied..."turn the switch off then!!!!" :roll: [lol] x
young_fishin_neep
05-Dec-07, 19:19
atleast he knew how to do it, me and mum couldnt figure out for the life of us how to do the front room ones, ended up asking a friend to come and do it for us, atleast we know now :)
My 5 yr old daughter was at the toilet just now and I told her "Make sure you flush your hands and wash the toilet......I mean wash your hands and flush the toilet!!!"
She thought this was quite hilarious, needless to say! :lol:
My 5 yr old daughter was at the toilet just now and I told her "Make sure you flush your hands and wash the toilet......I mean wash your hands and flush the toilet!!!"
She thought this was quite hilarious, needless to say! :lol:
In my experience most folk would rather flush their hands than wash the toilet!;)
karia
In my experience most folk would rather flush their hands than wash the toilet!;)
Actually, my other daughter (2) likes to wash her hands in the toilet water instead of the sink. Don't know where she gets that habit from - not me that's for sure!!:eek:
being half glaswegian, half thursonian, my son has a cute accent.. but he does seem to say to many weegie words.. one day he asked me to "haud" his hand.. i replied...
"its not "haud", its "had".... i mean "hold"!!!"
no wonder hes confused!!
A few weeks ago was walking the dog down past the vets in thurso. My OH turns and asked "What's human tartan!". I replyed that I dont know, never heard of it, Why?
She pointed at a sign on a building between the vets and the bus depo wuth the Red Cross logo
Bulgarian Aid
Humanitarian
I have never laughed so hard!
do you walk the god often?? :lol:
A few weeks ago was walking thegod down past the vets in thurso. My OH turns and asked "What's human tartan!". I replyed that I dont know, never heard of it, Why?
She pointed at a sign on a building between the vets and the bus depo wuth the Red Cross logo
Bulgarian Aid
Humanitarian
I have never laughed so hard!
well being short sighted and needing stronger glasses i have an excuse! i couldnt read it properly
do you walk the god often??
I suspect he walks the god as often as it demands..who would argue?!!:eek:
Would this god be called 'Alfie' by any chance brew? (and are you getting hit aboot the hied by Ash for the 'tartan' story about now!) ;)
I suspect he walks the god as often as it demands..who would argue?!!:eek:
Would this god be called 'Alfie' by any chance brew? (and are you getting hit aboot the hied by Ash for the 'tartan' story about now!) ;)
yes he will be lol!
well being short sighted and needing stronger glasses i have an excuse! i couldnt read it properly
What like the new glasses you got about mmm 6-7 months ago, and an eye test .
I think the door is going to be locked when I get home.
And I do believe that Alfie thinks he is God by the way he goes about.
Some years ago I was helping my daughter to find accommodation in the town where she had just got a new job. I was peering at the notices in the news agents window.
'Here's one' I said. '' Bed Sitter, need Good home? ''
''MUM'' said my daughter
'' It reads......... Red Settar needs Good Home ''
We stopped at the Optician's on the way home .
Years ago, my Mum used to work in the Norseman. One day, the Managing Director was up for a meeting. He popped out into the Foyer to summon my Mum to the meeting. Instead of saying "I'll be right with you after I hoover this floor", my Mum replied "I'll be right with you after I floover this whore"
Years afterward the guy used to tell my Mum. "Hey, your whore is looking dirty, better take the floover to it"
Went out to lunch with my mum some years ago in a very trendy Bistro with moody black and white film stars on the walls and moodier idiots in the kitchen.
waitress appeared
My mother ordered whatever she was having...'with a side Saddle' :eek:
Waitress never flinched just said 'salad with that' in the drawwwwly way they do
I was helpless!:lol:
I was also terrified that my mum had a horse parked somewhere and fancied we might ride home!
Karia
Lolabelle
05-Dec-07, 21:03
[quote=highlander;306106] Here are a few of my bloomers. [quote]
Bloomers??? As in underwear, knickers or pants????
or did you mean "Bloopers"?
I was speaking to a man in the street one day, and he was describing how someone had attacked him, hitting him in the "scrotum", he pointed at the middle of his chest as he said it.
"Sternum" I corrected and tried to keep a straight face. :eek: [lol]
What about the nun who sang
'' Oh Holy Night,
The Stars are Shitely brining ''
I bet you'll do it next time too !
helenwyler
05-Dec-07, 22:44
I was talking to OH's boss, long time ago now, who was trying to make polite conversation with me, and asked if I still played the cello.
"Only in stits and farts" I replied.:eek:
I had a cold and informed my mother that I had blocked fallopian tubes (eustachian tubes)..I was about 14 at the time.
My brother in law is famed for making up words. He informed his family that he wanted to buy a semi-detached house on its own. Also whilst tinkering on his car he insisted he needed a "percussion" instrument (precision).
A friend and I were having a couple of pints in Dominos when the Pet Shop Boys were being played. The song was You Were Always on My Mind. With a grunt of disgust my mate declared "If Elvis were alive and listening to that, he would be turning in his grave!!"
They don't make like that anymore;)
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