Curfews

[unicorn]

What time do your kids have to be home at night and what age are they? Maybe I am an overprotective parent but I won't allow my 12 year old to be out after 9 and even then, she has to be exactly where she says she will be. I don't allow her to go down the street at night (not that she has asked) but I know others her age are. The latest she has been out is 10 in the summer evening's but only because she was close to home and there were lots of kids together playing hide and seek. I have seen kids way younger than her out at 10-11 at night and find it very surprising. Even when I was 16 the latest I was allowed out was 10 and I respected that.
So what's everyone else's views?

[starry]

My son is 12 and he has to be in by 9.30 school nights and 10.30 weekends and holidays.

It very much depends on what they are doing, if they are just hanging around then I would be keeping an eye on him but if they are inside at a pals then I would let them come in later.

I was stricter with the first but am a wee bit more laid back with the younger ones.

I don't think there is a right or wrong with this one, you just got to do what suits your children, where you live etc.

[danc1ngwitch]

I think that if the kids are having fun and it's one of those nights where everyone is out and no harm is being done then why not let them out to 10:30. ( weekend )
I think that a group of children kicking back and having fun and giggles do frighten members of the public, this is not the childrens fault, its the fault of the insecure times we live in.
Gone are the days of harmless tap door run.
guess the ones who used to chase us as children grew old and are still game for a laugh but not fit now to run[lol]
( some people do need to build a bridge and get over it )

[cuddlepop]

In high school up until my daughter was 16 she had to be in by 10pm.
Now 16 but still at school she knows if she leaves it any later than its soooo hard to get up in the morning.
weekends in by 12 and only if she's at a mates.If caught hanging about down the street then its war.

Kids now adays have no respect for authority or their elders :(

Saying they've nothing to do is no excuse,what exactly did we have to do growing up in the 60's and 70's.
Arguably less than our pampered self endulged kids.:mad:

[Lolabelle]

I was out for dinner last night in a fairly trendy part of Newcastle, lots of bars and cafe's open till very late.
At around 10 pm, a bunch of girls, that looked around 11 or 12, sporting mums make up (maybe their own?) walked past unescorted by any adult. I was shocked, because it was quite late, and they were quite unsupervised. We left shortly afterwards and had to go through a bunch of people fighting. I didn't think this was a good environment for such young girls. In this day and age we need to be careful.
There is a fine line between lettting kids grow up and being over protective, but it is one that parents have to walk, because the consequences are too dreadfull to contemplate. And some young ones don't have the experience or forethought to see the possibilities.

Having said all that, I was raised on a farm, so we were either home, staying over at someones, or they stayed over at our place. When people stayed at our place we camped out down the paddock and smoked and sat around giggling. :Razz

[golach]

I think that a group of children kicking back and having fun and giggles do frighten members of the public, this is not the childrens fault,

If it was your car or property, garden gate, garage door or the councils property that these innocent children were kicking back and having fun and giggles, as you see them doing, then I do not think you would take such a liberal attitude.
Too many people now dare not approach or try to reason with the little thugs, nowadays, there are too many reports of adults being stabbed, beaten & kicked to death in every news bulletin and newspaper every week.
They are bairns, what right have they got to destroy lives and property because they were bored and had nothing to do and no facilities, they have homes do they not, whats wrong with them being there?

[unicorn]

there were some kids today playing hockey on rollerblades with a football and 2 big bits of wood in each hand right beside my car and rightly or wrongly I told them it was not on and to move elsewhere. They just looked at me so I asked would they be paying to fix it if they hit my car even by mistake, needless to say they moved quite quickly then. They were not doing it deliberately just don't think they even thought that it really was not a good idea.

[sam]

After reading through all of this thread it seems to me that some of you are tarring all kids with the same stick, I know that there are plenty of kids out there who are far from little angels, but i blame the parents who let them do as they please as long as the kids are out of their faces, but there are also plenty of kids who are well behaved and polite and yes they do hang out it groups, which i know can be intimidating, but come on guys give the kids a break[disgust]

[Bloo]

If it was your car or property, garden gate, garage door or the councils property that these innocent children were kicking back and having fun and giggles, as you see them doing, then I do not think you would take such a liberal attitude.
Too many people now dare not approach or try to reason with the little thugs, nowadays, there are too many reports of adults being stabbed, beaten & kicked to death in every news bulletin and newspaper every week.
They are bairns, what right have they got to destroy lives and property because they were bored and had nothing to do and no facilities, they have homes do they not, whats wrong with them being there?

Little Thugs? Thats possibly a step to far considering that a good amount of the kids in Thurso aren't bad. And for the one's who are bad i personally think its because they have nothing to do.

[Bloo]

After reading through all of this thread it seems to me that some of you are tarring all kids with the same stick, I know that there are plenty of kids out there who are far from little angels, but i blame the parents who let them do as they please as long as the kids are out of their faces, but there are also plenty of kids who are well behaved and polite and yes they do hang out it groups, which i know can be intimidating, but come on guys give the kids a break[disgust]

Good on you Sam:cool:

[2little2late]

Curfews should be set by law and depending on the child's age dictates what time the curfew starts. I really do hate to see school kids out late at night. But then parents are to blame for that problem. My children can go outside if they wish but they choose not to. If they do go out we always know where they are and they know what time to be home. Although the lad is only 10 and we don't let him out of our sight. There's nothing wrong with being over protective. We are only showing our kids how much we care about them.

[Bloo]

Don't you think thats just a tad extreme?

[unicorn]

I don't think it is extreme to care about your child's safety and try to protect them from dangers that they are too young to cope with.

[starry]

I think it would be awful to have something as basic as when your child comes in at night dictated by law.

[unicorn]

I remember having a friend when I was a teen whose mum never cared when she came home and was not bothered if she came home, to begin with I thought wow and was so jealous. She stayed with us a lot and told me that she found it great because she had the same rules as me and she was happy that someone cared about her :eek: That really woke me up.

[Welcomefamily]

My 17 year old is generally expected back for 10pm unless we know in advance, if its later we just need the details of it, however we do expect him to spend some time doing homework or revision before going out. My 15 year old is 9.30 on week days and 10.00 at week ends if we know where he is. My 14 year old daughter is 9.00pm school days and 10.00pm week ends if we know where she is going, when she is coming back, my 9 year old is in bed for 8.00 week days and 9.00 at week ends. The other ones are over 18 and are both away at university on sponsored courses.

Children under 12 need to be in bed for about 8 or 9 generally, in order to give the neuro networks enough time to develop, learning requires three things, A rested brain, a good supply of proteins so new memory synapses can be laid down, and then a stimulating and active learning input such as a teacher or a computer programme.
No matter how good the last is, it can not happen with out the first two.

[alanatkie]

My child age 10 has to be in at 8pm during the winter as it is that dark out but during the summer it is 9pm maybe a little later if she is playing in our street. I have seen children that are younger still wandering the street at 11 during the summer months which i think is shocking.

[Bobinovich]

Our two, at 5 and 7, are too young to go anywhere themselves. They'll happily play out the front with neighbours kids but are not allowed to cross the road. They are generally in bed by 7.30pm on schooldays except for Tuesday nights where it's 8.30pm due to Beavers & swimming.

Weekends they'll sometimes stay up until 8 - 8.30 but, depending what we've been up to during the day, will quite often request to go to bed at 7.30pm 'cos they're tired!

[unicorn]

I absolutely agree, we see it also and it is terrifying especially at weekend to see these kids out unsupervised. I cannot relax if mine is even 10 minutes late and I nip out to see if I can spot her at the park :eek:

[Welcomefamily]

My child age 10 has to be in at 8pm during the winter as it is that dark out but during the summer it is 9pm maybe a little later if she is playing in our street. I have seen children that are younger still wandering the street at 11 during the summer months which i think is shocking.
I totally agree, during the summer at Castletown, you had kids as young as 10 out at 11.30. It speaks volumes about their parents.

[alanatkie]

I totally agree, during the summer at Castletown, you had kids as young as 10 out at 11.30. It speaks volumes about their parents.

I have to agree with you their. I had to explain to my child when she asked why i didnt want her wandering about at that time of night even though there was younger children still out in our street.

[unicorn]

That can be a hard thing to do, as you can see your kids thinking that they are missing out on something and you are the bad one for not letting them out.

[BRIE]

my 14 & 16yr old have to be in at 10pm weekdays & 11pm at weekends but they never stay out that late in the winter. my 11yr old has to be in at 8.30pm.
It is very difficult to explain to a child why they cant stay out later than other children & i did have difficulty answering my 11yr old last night when there was a 3yr old out on their own at 9.30pm!

[alanatkie]

Yes it is a difficult thing to explain but when i did, i said i wanted her in so i knew she would be safe & i didnt mind her staying up later during the summer holidays to read or go on the computer.

[unicorn]

These are the things that truly shock me, People often say we worry too much about children being snatched or abducted, but how easy would it be for a predator to take a small child like that in the dark :eek: what are these types of parents thinking about [evil]

[alanatkie]

Children are so precious or indeed they are meant to be to their parents but yet you see these young children wandering the streets by themselves. I do wonder what goes through these parents heads sometimes!!!

[2little2late]

Don't you think thats just a tad extreme?

Can you think of anything better? Trouble is nowadays, parents are just glad to see the back of their own kids. If they aren't getting on their nerves at home they don't give a toss where they are. As long as the parents get as much peace from their kids as they can they are happy. When I was younger I had to be home at set times. Even when I was sixteen I had to be home at a certain time. I was not allowed to be out late or vist any pubs until I was eighteen.
When I look back at my life I don't regret a single minute of it, all I think to myself is " Because my parents were strict with my upbringing I am a better person for it". And if my kids turn out the same as I have I will know I have done it right.

[emszxr]

i had to be in by 8:30 on a school night and upto 10 i think weekend and that was up til i was 16-17 i think.
parents are letting their kids and especially younger ones out too late, or even out at all. there is no way i would allow my 3 year old out. 3 year olds should not be allowed out to play outside their own gardens, imo.
i agree with 2little2late. some parents dont care where their kids are, or what they are getting up to. it seems to be the 'norm' here to allow your 13-15 year old out to adult dances, get drunk, and sleep at a friends house, who the parent hasn't even checked if their child is actually staying there or not.

[danc1ngwitch]

If it was your car or property, garden gate, garage door or the councils property that these innocent children were kicking back and having fun and giggles, as you see them doing, then I do not think you would take such a liberal attitude.
Too many people now dare not approach or try to reason with the little thugs, nowadays, there are too many reports of adults being stabbed, beaten & kicked to death in every news bulletin and newspaper every week.
They are bairns, what right have they got to destroy lives and property because they were bored and had nothing to do and no facilities, they have homes do they not, whats wrong with them being there?
Not what i meant and you know it. NOT all children wreck other ppl's stuff to have fun and giggles.
For goodness sake, most of children that are up to no good is from well to do families. Let them parents stop socialising wea their so called friends and get the situation in hand.
But the norm is to point the finger at the small child/children in the street, the child that ain't dressed from head to toe in the best gear, Why cause it's easier to do that.
People are easy to read, like i said its always " not my son/daughter"
I have fun and giggles wea my children and we don't go terrorising the not so fortunate children etc etc.

[Ash]

i now understand why my parents were so strict with me when i was younger, i had to be in by 8.30 - 9pm up until 13, then abit later as got older, but they were never keen on me going down the street, and was never allowed in cars, the kids i saw down the street on friday night walking past my house at 10.45 looked soo young, and the fact that its freezing aswell, why on earth do they want to walk about in the cold, coming back from a walk last night with the wee one, fair enough it was only 6pm but 3 girls smashed a coke bottle and started laughing, my little girl was abit scared, i dont understand the youth of today, theres a difference between wanting to have fun and being plain stupid!

[brandy]

my boys are 4 and 3 and they are not even allowed to play outside by theirselves.
i do let them in the back garden with the door open in the summer.. as the cant get out of the garden, but i would never let them play out front by themselves. they are usually in bed by 8 pm (depending if ben will sleep! hes hit his night terror stage!) but other than that they do not leave my sight!

[unicorn]

it may sound silly but magic powder always worked for mine when the night terrors started, I used to kiss her good night tuck her in and blow some special magic powder that fairies made to her before she slept that she caught and ate (totally imagined) but it actually worked, and if I forgot it she would wake upset. The mind is an amazing thing.

[changilass]

Thanks for that tip Unicorn, it is stored for future use if needed.