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Ash
25-Sep-07, 21:27
is anyone else watching this?

im in shock! the first mentor believes that you put ur baby down at 7 and leave them to 7 in morning, and leave them outside during the day in the pram!, she says your baby adapts to your life not the other way around, it just seems so cruel, she encourages parents to have parties as the kids wont wake up, there are two other mentors, ones lots of love and affection. and the last one is tribal methods

balto
25-Sep-07, 21:38
hi ash i saw a clip of it this morning and was totally shocked by that ladys ideas of the right way to bring up a child how she can say babys are just attention seekers is beyond me, i for 1 never left any of my 3 to cry.

sam
25-Sep-07, 21:47
Its not the babies that are attention seekers it the adults.
Some folk have some pretty strange ideas about bringing up kids, i was speaking to a friend the other day who said she overheard a couple of women talking about her and her child because her kid was in a pushchair and sucking on a dummy,When i said it was little wonder she asked what i ment (now her boy is 4 1/2 and i firmly believe that he is way to old to be sucking on a dummy and definatly to old to be pushed around in a pushchair )
so as i asked her why she has him in the pushchair her answer he takes to long to walk anywhere and she cant be bothered going everywhere slowly, so when i asked why he has a dummy her answer to that was och it keeps him quite.
While speaking to her the kid spat the dummy out about 6 times only for her to pick it up and stick it right back in his mouth, then she wondered why i said she was hindering his development some folk have no sense and she isnt some young lassie either she is in her late 20's:roll:

wifie
25-Sep-07, 22:51
I suppose they can have as many of these programmes as they like but people will do what the want anyway. Fair enough. I would like to know though - which idiots pay that 'Truby King' woman up to a £1000 per day (!) for her wisdom. She has no children and the only empathy she showed was when she touched the mother's arm as she had to listen to her newborn child screaming on the monitor.

bobsgirl
26-Sep-07, 10:16
I will say when I had my kids I used to watch these programs religiously. They can be very helpful but at the end of the day, every parent and child are different and therfore these methods dont always work.
I for one would never have left my kids outside in their buggy whether it be my own front door or a shop, I would always be with them.

Leaving them to cry? Now I did this method but it wasnt leaving them to cry all night, it was the go back in 5 mins, then go back in 10 mins method and it really did work.
My kids are now 5 and 7, and they still have a bedtime routine like that and they do play up a bit to stay up later but they only get to on weekends or if they have clubs on.

Also I can have a night out starting in my house, having a laugh and I can guarantee that my kids will sleep through it!! Nothing wrong with that at all. Very rare but it does happen. :)

Dadie
26-Sep-07, 10:18
I think I would rather bury my head in the sand than watch that !
At least then I wont get my blood pressure up!!
I suppose each to their own in bringing up their kids but most of us just muddle through without (hopefully) getting too much wrong!

cat
26-Sep-07, 11:56
hi.i was doing it all wrong as i was watching!! i had my 10wk old baby up to that time of night having her bottle,lots of cuddles and then she fell asleep!:D
even their little girl wanted to cuddle their new baby. i couldn't of done it, wouldn't want to. but then i don't mind life being different when a baby arrives!
in saying that,at 10 wks my baby hardly cries and has her last feed at 10 ish and thats her till morning,any time from 7am till 9 this morning!!

mums angels
26-Sep-07, 11:59
I never watched this last night but a friend did and we were discussing it this morning .

I have never and will never leave my children outside in a pram or outside a shop, however i do believe that a child can go to bed at 7 until 7 , it takes time and patience , with my first i never let her cry and she went to bed at the same time as us uintil she was one years old ..not good !!! now with the second at 6 weeks old i did the cry it out method with him starting at 7 o'clock put him down in a dark room returning every few minutes to touch his tummy and reassure him that i was still there and as he woke in the night i didn't talk to him or put lights on , i fed him and put him back down etc

now with third it may sound harsh but i was blessed with a very placid child
:) so started this on day one we came home the night he was born and did the same method, he never cried for long he almost went straight to sleep often not even needing one visit to touch his tummy for reassurance , i never let him nap on me whilst at home , he was always put down in his bed after a week he never made a peep and when he had his night feeds he went back without a whimper ...i was very lucky with him and tommorow he is two and i have never had a problem with his bedtime routine, bed everynight around 7 if not before ...only problem is having to wake him in the mornig to get him organised to take the others to school, he loves his bed:) luckily all 3 go to bed without much of a fuss, the older two get to stay up later on a weekend bu t don't fuss too much when the bed word is mentioned

but as the saying goes ..what works for one doesn't always work for another

Oddquine
26-Sep-07, 12:08
I'm glad I'm not bringing children up nowadays.........too much interference from government and theories from "professionals".

Beats me how on earth we managed forty+ years ago................common sense, maybe?

mums angels
26-Sep-07, 12:11
I'm glad I'm not bringing children up nowadays.........too much interference from government and theories from "professionals".

Beats me how on earth we managed forty+ years ago................common sense, maybe?


well thats the funny thing , nowadays i think parents worry so much about what other people are doing and what the health visitors say etc ...common sense flies out of the window. i don't worry about what other people think , i do what suits me best and it works for me and my kids

DM07
26-Sep-07, 12:19
God I couldnt beleive it when I watched it. I had to watch it again on channel 4 plus 1. I was nearly crying watching the 'sleeping 7 until 7 method'. Im not sure on the bottle feeding but I thought there is no way that the bairn will sleep through the 12 hours and sure enough the poor bairn was up after 1 and a half hours. The 1st mentor has never had children either. I have a 9 week old and she is taken in to our bed in the night for feeds if she wakes and she will stay there until morning. I carry her about in the papose as a new baby is not used to a pram, they are used to being squashed against mother. She is slowly getting used to the pram. She slept from 9 last night until 6 this morning at 9 weeks old and she is exclusivly breastfed. This is the 4th night she has slept through. Her brother was brought up the same way but you do look into things too much with your first and I read a little too much. He never slep though the night until 7 months old!!! Every baby different. The second mentors 'do it your way' is good advice since every bairn different and every mother knows her bairns best

cat
26-Sep-07, 12:23
very true oddquine. its not the babies thats changed(my mum tells me!)
its the parents!
too many rushing to get back to work or just selfish and dont want to change!!
and i'm not having a go at working mums as i've been one,but i'd rather stay at home with my baby now,i can live without a lot of luxuries to do so, i hope!!

dunderheed
26-Sep-07, 12:25
is anyone else watching this?

im in shock! the first mentor believes that you put ur baby down at 7 and leave them to 7 in morning, and leave them outside during the day in the pram!, she says your baby adapts to your life not the other way around, it just seems so cruel, she encourages parents to have parties as the kids wont wake up, there are two other mentors, ones lots of love and affection. and the last one is tribal methods

when i was a baby i spent most of my day out in the garden in the pram, it was the done thing in them days. when it comes to raising children i would suggest binning the books and avoiding these programmes as they all give conflicting views - go with your gut instinct

mums angels
26-Sep-07, 12:42
is anyone else watching this?

im in shock! the first mentor believes that you put ur baby down at 7 and leave them to 7 in morning, and leave them outside during the day in the pram!, she says your baby adapts to your life not the other way around, it just seems so cruel, she encourages parents to have parties as the kids wont wake up, there are two other mentors, ones lots of love and affection. and the last one is tribal methods


as much as i disagree with an awful lot that i heard about the show last night this comment i'm afraid is true

now what i mean by that is ..my husband works away for a month at a time(and most husbands etc are at work before school anyway) so like many i do the majority of the parenting on my own,.now its all good and well with your first child to get a routine that suits the baby , but for example when i had my third i had two older kids to get up and ready for school in the morning so the baby had to FIT in with us , he was never mistreated or ignored but i would have to wake him in the morn , feed and change him then would put him in his bouncer (which he wasn't always impressed with) but i kept talking away so he knew i was still around and got on with gettting the others organised.... the wee soul would have liked to have slept later and no doubt would have taken a better feed if id let him but i couldn't let him change all off our lives as the kids couldn't get themselves to school , he settled in well and i don't think this was cruel

nightowl
26-Sep-07, 14:01
I watched the programme last night and my heart was breaking for the "Truby King" mother. If this rigid regime is going to last for three months, what a lot she is going to miss out on (and she'll know it, having an older child). When my children were new babies, I remember just holding them and watching them with wonder, not just when they were fretting or tired, but when they were sleeping, full, after a feed, or awake and gurgling. All the wee baby expressions and noises, and oh, the fine downy hair. This all changes so quickly. It's time she'll never have again or be able to replace. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for developing routines, but to deprive yourself and your new baby of any human contact apart from seeing to its basic needs seems unnecessarily harsh to me, and surely can only harm the natural bonding process.

Ash
26-Sep-07, 14:56
i just dont get why some people would want this kind of advice, my wee one goes down at 7(she is 3) and sleeps til 7 next day, when she was a baby i would let her cry alittle but not for 25mins! as to leaving them outside all day, thats ridicolous, fair enough if you are with them otherwise no

cat
26-Sep-07, 16:49
why is 7-7 the time that suits? my first never slept for 12 hours and he stopped sleeping through the day long before he was 1.
surely dads want to see their babies at some point too?

mums angels
26-Sep-07, 17:24
why is 7-7 the time that suits? my first never slept for 12 hours and he stopped sleeping through the day long before he was 1.
surely dads want to see their babies at some point too?

7-7 (more like 8 :)) suits me because they get up at the back of 7 so i feel they need 12 hours sleep so that they are refreshed for the day ahead. as for the father he works away a month at a time so its not an issue anymore for us but i remember when he used to be upset if he was home late and they were in bed so i would often try to keep them up but it made them grumpy and he'd complain about that too :lol: different things suit different people

emszxr
26-Sep-07, 17:36
i watched this with an open mouth, especially at the '50's' mentor.
i go with some of the advice from the spock and the other mentor. i do like the sling idea although i dont think it would be practical all day. esp when cleaning out rabbits and kennels.
although i do agree with a child being in some sort of routine, i dont think starting it from day 1 is very nice, not the way she was doing it anyway. and as for the no cuddles , kisses or affection, that is just plain horrible. there is no way i would let that woman in my house.

Ash
26-Sep-07, 17:53
im glad people agree with me, like you say every child is different, i had a routine for my wee one has a baby but it doesnt always work out, as for now she is tired by 7 after being a nursery in mornings, weekend she will stay up abit later, but only an hour really, i didnt like the mentor who had the woman constantly breastfeeding and the baby always on her, she was sleeping with the baby which can be soo dangerous!

emszxr
26-Sep-07, 19:29
ash, did she have the woman constantly breast feeding? i watched the programme and must have missed that part.

Ash
26-Sep-07, 19:31
ash, did she have the woman constantly breast feeding? i watched the programme and must have missed that part.


yeah she did, she said aswell to put her on breast when in bed with you so you can still sleep, is it just me or is that dangerous? the womans nipples got so sore with constant breastfeeding and no break

mums angels
26-Sep-07, 20:22
Sleeping with baby is dangerous as the baby may overheat and result in cot death it is very rare to have a parent squash a child unless of course drink is involved.

does anyone know if this episode will be repeated in the week , i'm kicking myself for not watching it now ????

cuddlepop
26-Sep-07, 20:44
I never watched it and am glad I didn't.My daughter's studying child care at college and at least has the common sense to trust her instinct.

Mother's where born with it its just your now programmed to ignore it.

If I had ignored my own my youngest wouldn't be here today.:eek:

young_fishin_neep
26-Sep-07, 21:20
i watched this programme with great intrest, i am studying access to health child and social care at college and to be perfectly honest i would go with my instinct.

the woman who wants the parents not to interact with their children is mad in my opinion as how would the child develope a healthy emotional feeling with their parents? i know i certainly couldnt do that wen i have a child.

the other two are just as bad, the childs never going to leave thier parents side when older and be to dependant on them surely.

go with your instincts i say. theres no right or wrong way to do it.

kaz xxxx

Julia
26-Sep-07, 21:26
I watched about half of the program and then had to switch it off, I wanted to drag the Truby King's mentor out of the tv and strangle her, what a cold-hearted cowbag!

Leaving a baby unattended outside is neglect, plain and simple! Not touching the baby at all between feeds is unbelievable, the baby may as well be brought up by a machine.

My son is now over 9 months old, he still has a couple of feeds during the night but for me it's not a problem, I don't mind in the slightest. Giving him lots of love and attention has not spoilt him, I think it's had the opposite affect, he is confident, very sociable and content.

I always made a point of never rocking any of my children to sleep, he falls asleep (without crying) on his own in his own bed as did my daughter, it makes life a lot easier.

DarkAngel
26-Sep-07, 22:05
I never seen this... Must watch it though!

Must admit my little boy goes down at 7 and that him til 7 the next mornin...

wifie
26-Sep-07, 22:15
yeah she did, she said aswell to put her on breast when in bed with you so you can still sleep, is it just me or is that dangerous? the womans nipples got so sore with constant breastfeeding and no break
Ash the woman with the sore nipples was the one whose labour was long and the baby was born with some problems and had been bottle fed for some time. The bottle feeding resulted in latching on problems which anyone who has breastfed will tell you can cause very sore nipples. I never let my babies sleep all night in my bed but would take them in for night time feeds which was comfy for all. It was possible to doze off during these feeds but instinct keeps you well aware of what is happening.

dunderheed
27-Sep-07, 08:19
i just dont get why some people would want this kind of advice, my wee one goes down at 7(she is 3) and sleeps til 7 next day, when she was a baby i would let her cry alittle but not for 25mins! as to leaving them outside all day, thats ridicolous, fair enough if you are with them otherwise no

ash is the lady who advised leaving the baby outside doing a lot of old fashioned things? if so this will be why she is advocating leaving the baby outside in the pram. as i said before i was left out for a good part of the day as a baby, i suppose its a sign of the times that you feel it would be unsafe to leave a baby outside (assuming its because of the threat of abduction that scares you). whe i was a baby i was brought up in a block of flats but i was never out of my mothers earshot .

squidge
27-Sep-07, 13:40
Sleeping with your baby is not dangerous unless you are hugely overweight, taking drugs illegal or prescription or drunk. Women all over the world sleep with thier babies and they dont squash them nor do they overheat and die.

Im a bit old fashioned - i like routine in my baby's day - i think it makes life easier for everyone but i couldnt follow that truby king method for a gold clock. I was interestedin this programme tho and i wondered how truby kings methods compare to Gina Ford who is a modern day routine flag waver who has been slated on web sites and in the papers recently. I went today and read her book and she is a walk in the park compared to truby king. It will be interesting to see how things pan out in this programme.

I haveto say i couldnt do the sling option either having my baby strapped to me 24/7 doesnt appeal either but ill be interested to see which baby sleeps through the soonest and which is the happiest. I think ill still do it "my way" though lol

Julia
27-Sep-07, 14:44
The best advice I have ever followed was from a TV program called 'The Baby Whisperer', Tracy Hogg had an incredible way with babies and children. She could calm even the most inconsolable child.

mccaugm
28-Sep-07, 16:12
The best advice I have ever followed was from a TV program called 'The Baby Whisperer', Tracy Hogg had an incredible way with babies and children. She could calm even the most inconsolable child.

I used to watch her just before my toddler was born and for a few months after. She was much more laid back and did advocate cuddles etc. She was firm but fair and never judged just gave her sensible advice in a friendly way.

chocolatechip
28-Sep-07, 22:06
i didn't watch the programme, but in my own opinion if your baby wakes up in the night or even duriing the day when having a nap itmaybe that the baby wants a cuddle from mum or even fed and it's the parents insinct not some so called woman says you should ignore the child. And I don't have kids