Junk food and obesity

[Setanta]

I watched that film (well most of it) Thursday night where the guy went on a Mc Donald,s diet for a month. Must say the results amazed me especially the effect on his liver. He gained obviously a lot of weight over 20 lbs. His health deteriorated dramatically and the doctors warned him not to go past the month, some did try to stop him before then.
Today in the news there was a huge increase in obesity among children under the age of 10. To me obesity in children is a crime and it’s a crime that parents should be held responsible for. Bad diets, lack of healthy education and the almost complete failure for children to take any exercise naturally. To me this should all be a natural aspect of growing up in the home. What do you think?
By the way I know that some children can be obese for medical reasons but it is very rare.

[dragonfly]

I have two children, both eat exactly the same foods and both are very active - they attend swimming squads twice weekly, martial arts classes , badminton, and ten pin bowling not to mention playing football netball etc in school and out with friends. My son is probably underweight for his age (under 5st and 11 years old) but my daughter while by no means obese can and does put on weight very easily. I myself am overweight and have always struggled and because of this I have always tried to educate my children to eat healthily. We have always eaten 5+ portions of fruit/veg a day, as I don't beleive in giving them junk food and I don't buy biscuits, cakes, crisps or sweets, so why does my daughter, like me put on weight while we eat the same foods as my husband and son?
The answer is in the genes! yes McDonalds aren't good for you and eating them regularily will do harm but there are other contributing factors.

[©Amethyst]

I ate like a pig when I was younger. Weighed 3 st all through primary school. Doubled my weight in high school and have gained a little weight since. I eat like a pig the whole time and yet am still underweight. And I eat an awful lot of junk food (occasionally with some healthy stuff scattered in there somewhere).

To look at me, you wouldn't think I eat so much.

It's just, people have different metabolism rates. Mine's quite high, as is my 9 year old sister's. My brother's is low and struggles to shift weight. He's a chubby lad, but I wouldn't say overweight, while others would look at him and think he's on the way to obesity.

Each person is completely different. Different foods affect them in different ways. I've met people who are overweight, and they eat the healthiest food and get a good balance of diet and exercise.

The odd McDonald's meal every now and then won't harm you... but the diner wasn't put there for people to eat procesed junk 3 times a day!

[Alananders68]

I have two children, both eat exactly the same foods and both are very active - they attend swimming squads twice weekly, martial arts classes , badminton, and ten pin bowling not to mention playing football netball etc in school and out with friends. My son is probably underweight for his age (under 5st and 11 years old) but my daughter while by no means obese can and does put on weight very easily. I myself am overweight and have always struggled and because of this I have always tried to educate my children to eat healthily. We have always eaten 5+ portions of fruit/veg a day, as I don't beleive in giving them junk food and I don't buy biscuits, cakes, crisps or sweets, so why does my daughter, like me put on weight while we eat the same foods as my husband and son?
The answer is in the genes! yes McDonalds aren't good for you and eating them regularily will do harm but there are other contributing factors.

Nothing to do with genes...it's because men need more calories than women. Look at the national guidelines for recommended daily calorie intake and men need considerably more than women so obviously if your daughter is eating exactly the same as your son, then she will gain weight.

You are what you eat, people who put obesity down to genes or medical conditions are just doing so because they can't admit they eat too much and people go along with it so as not to hurt there feelings, even doctors. There was an interesting documentary on it a few months back and doctors themselves said as much.

Your weight is a combination of how much you eat and how much you burn off, some people will differ in they have different metabolism rates but your metabolism rate is affected by things like the times that you eat and exercise and how long you sleep for.

[EDDIE]

Aexander get a grip some people cant help being overweight if they have a medical condition and yes for the average person that doesnt have medical condition its true what they say you are what u eat

[Rheghead]

For a change, I am with Alananders on this one. Medical conditions that are responsible for obesity are in fact extremely rare, but many lazy and well fed people just use this arguement as a way of not facing up to their diet and exercise problems.

[Margaret M.]

Medical conditions that are responsible for obesity are in fact extremely rare


Actually thyroid disease is extremely common, particularly in women. Since the thyroid controls the metabolism, thyroid disease is often the culprit for one being unable to control/lose weight. Thyroid disease is now relatively easy to diagnose and the problem can usually be rectified, however, one has to recognize that the weight problem is probably not related to nutritional choices and consult a doctor. Just as the thyroid can cause one to be overweight (hypothyroid) it can also cause one to lose weight (hyperthyroid).

[EDDIE]

Rheghead what your really saying is everytime you see someone that is overweight the first thing you think is that the person eats to much.Thats a terrible way of thinking im suprised at you usually your comments are quite sensible.Some as in some cant help being well over weight if they have a medical condition.Look at that guy that was on that breakfast program 3 or 4 months ago were his brain kept on telling him he was hungry all the time and eats all the time thats not his fault is it.The vast majorty of people that have no medical problems if they are over weight then yes they are eating the wrong foods but u cant put every one in the category in the way that u think.

[ktb50]

Margaret: It sounds like you might be speaking as if you have a thyroid disorder, however, there are just as many people with underactive thyroid glands that do not put any weight on, infact if your thyroid has been stablised surely you should loose any weight that you may have gained.

I'm talking from experience, I have a thyroid disorder, and I'm afraid I go by the theory of, I lot of woman use being underactive as an excuse....Ohhhh poor me I'm underactive, hey.....that means I can have an excuse for being a little cubby....If your doc gets you on the right medication, you shouldn't infact gain or loose any weight.

I reckon you are what you eat, I have what I considered a healthy diet, I walk for about 1 hour a day down the beach (whatever the weather), and I also have a very busy job, If I gorge myself on what you might consider unhealthy foods, or drink much booze I put on weight.....If I dont eat rubbish and don't drink I loose the weight, simple as that.

There are many peolpe that think the eat healthy food, this may be the case, but it is also how much you eat, if you actually weight out the correct recommended portion size, and compare it to what you would usually eat, I'm sure most folk eat way too much.

Its quite scary when you measure out how much, rice, pasta, chips, tatties you are ment to eat, I used to eat about 3 times the quantity of rice that I should. Cut down portion size and you can loose a lot of weight.

However, I was also shocked by the McDonalds film, I'm not a great lover of fast food anyway, I'm a fruit and veg junkie (always have been), but its really put me off now.

Kate

[Alananders68]

his brain kept on telling him he was hungry all the time and eats all the time thats not his fault is it
That's a good one that is :lol: :lol: Can you imagine a drink driver telling the sherriff it was because his brain kept telling him to drink, or a robber saying his brain kept telling him to steal, get a grip on reality will ye.

Yes there are medical conditions that affect the metabolism but Rheghead is right about them being rare and even when they exist they are not to the extreme that some would have us believe. You are what you eat, Kate is right about how many people think they eat normally when they infact eat too much and because they are so convinced they are eating normally they think it must be down to genes or medical conditions. I know someone who is obese and believes they eat healthily when they don't and no amount of telling him will convince him otherwise, he thinks because products are advertised as healthy or less fat that they are ok to eat and doesn't seem to accept the moderation part :confused .

[squidge]

Im a fat lady!

Im pretty and funny and smart and clever but i am a fat lady.

My weight has been pretty constant now for about 7 years. I eat a healthy diet and swim three times a week and walk the dog daily but i remain a fat lady. I have an underactive thyroid gland and Polycystic ovary syndrome. My cholesterol level is fine my blood pressure is good my liver is fine too. I have been seriously ill twice in my life and my recovery was not hampered by my weight - in fact i didnt lose much as a result of being ill. I have had three babies and by the time i was full term i was 1lb lighter with the first than i was at the start, i was 6lbs lighter with the second and a stone lighter with the third. I have successfully lost weight over my lifetime with weight watchers and the like but my weight gradulaly creeps up to what it is now. Im actually disgustingly healthy just now but im still a fat lady.

I eat no more nor less than the next person... I certainly couldnt eat those supersize meals that were shown in that film - in fact it made me feel very sick to look at them. Im not gluttonous, im not lazy, im not anything other than normal. I dont drink hardly at all these days maybe a bottle of wine a week, Im still a fat lady. My sister isnt - i look like my nana - she was a big woman my mum is slim- im not - my children are slim too.

So whats the point of this - it is that you are what you are. Being defensive is waste of energy , being judgmental is cruel and shows a lack of understanding of other people. Junk food has its place in a healthy balanced diet, A macdonalds a month wont make you ill or make you fat and low fat spread an inch thick on a doorstep slive of bread wont make you lose weight.

if youa re in a rush have your pizza or your fish and chips - the next night you will have a salad or something low in fat - be sensible like yourself and enjoy!!!

[dragonfly]

Nothing to do with genes...it's because men need more calories than women. Look at the national guidelines for recommended daily calorie intake and men need considerably more than women so obviously if your daughter is eating exactly the same as your son, then she will gain weight.

I am quite aware of the fact that a womans calorie intake is less than a mans and what I said is that we eat the same foods not the same portions. I am also aware of the national guidlines and have spent my adult lifetime looking at calories/fat content in foods and that is why I steer clear of processed ready meals.

As Squidge so aptly put it, we are what we are and I for one am happy to be less than perfect :D

[EDDIE]

I agree with squidge she has hit the nail on the head with this topic

[jings00]

Aye, well said Squidge. Folk shouldn't judge just cos the way someone looks, walk a mile in their shoes...'n all that. :)

[Fran]

:D well said Squidge, i admire you for your comments.
Heart disorders also cause weght gain. A lot of people with heart problems put on weight without changing their diet or eating too much, but becuase they cannot be so active as they were before.
Also, heart and blood pressure medication cause weight gain, as well as underactive thyroids.

[Rheghead]

Ok, squidge, but if you exercise regularly and STUCK to a diet which restricts you to 2000 calories per day then it is my belief that you will lose a lot of weight tag lag, providing of course that you are not one of the unfortunate few that suffers from one of those rare conditions that will make no difference to your best intentions.

[Margaret M.]

Margaret: It sounds like you might be speaking as if you have a thyroid disorder, however, there are just as many people with underactive thyroid glands that do not put any weight on, infact if your thyroid has been stablised surely you should loose any weight that you may have gained.

My weight is fine, I eat a very healthy diet and I'm in the gym for 1 - 2 hours, 5 days a week. What I was trying to say in my post was that conditions that may affect your weight are not extremely rare as someone stated. 25 million Americans have a thyroid disorder and there are many more who don't realize that they may have a problem. I'm absolutely not saying to use this as an excuse to justify being overweight but for those who eat sensibly, exercise regularly and still cannot budge the weight, it may be a good idea to have their thyroid checked.

[Drutt]

I hada a quick google on hypothyroidism (which can cause weight gain), as it wasn't something I'd regard as either rare or common, both of which had been proposed earlier in this thread.

I found that in the UK, it is thought that 1.5-2% of women over 60 (the group in whom it is most common) have hypothryroidism, and it is less common in younger people and in men generally.

A US website, however, reports that 4-9% of the general US population and 9-16% of people over the age of 60 have hypothyroidism (whether diagnosed or as yet undiagnosed).

My question is, are the UK and US populations really so different (and if so, why)? Or are US doctors overdiagnosing it?

[ktb50]

I'm not sure why people keep going on about Thyroid Disorders......just cause your thyroid is over or under active doesn't mean you loose or gain weight.

And like I said in theory once the docs have stabalised you on pills, any weight gain/loss you may have had should go back to normal.

Yes, and before anyone mentions it, I know there are excpetions to the rules, but I am speaking as someone whos thyroid is knackered....!

The most interesting part of the documentory I thought was when one of the people being interviewed said it was now socially unexceptable to smoke, but it was still okay to be fat even though in a few years time medical problems from being over weight will kill more people than smoking will......Mmmmmm something to be said there.....

Next time my larger friend moans about being fat whilst stuffing a cream cake in her mouth maybe I should point this out to her......

[ktb50]

Drutt

I believe in the USA the levels for detecting Thyroid problems (TSH, T3 and T4) values are set slightly lower than here in the UK.

So I guess that means more folk in the USA are regarded as having problems than here in the UK, but like you said it is fairly rare, so to me it seems a bit of an excuse to blame thyroid problems on being over weight, how come we never hear of all those underweight people that are overactive.......lol......I've never heard anyone ever say " Oh I'm so slim....I must be overactive"...........lol.....

Yes there are some people out there like Squidge who may just be on the larger size and can't so anything about it, but there are a lot more out there who are fat because of the rubbish they eat.

Anyway, how can peolpe afford to eat junk food all the time, I have a McDonalds/ Burger King every once in a while but it costs a fortune......

[Margaret M.]

......just cause your thyroid is over or under active doesn't mean you loose (lose not loose) or gain weight.

I have no desire to beat a dead horse here but that statement is total rubbish. The thyroid rules the metabolism so if it is not functioning up to par, weight is absolutely affected.

I am not one to make excuses for anyone who is overweight, clearly the biggest cause of obesity is poor nutritional choices and overeating. I can't fathom why anyone allows him/herself to become obese but those who are not stuffing themselves and are still gaining weight may want to have their thyroid checked. As I have stated previously, once the thyroid condition is diagnosed, it can be regulated, but one must realize that the thyroid may be the culprit first.

If anything, thyroid disease is underdiagnosed in the US and since 10% of the population have a thyroid disorder it is not considered rare by any means.

[Rheghead]

I found that in the UK, it is thought that 1.5-2% of women over 60 (the group in whom it is most common) have hypothryroidism, and it is less common in younger people and in men generally.

1.5% -2% of women over 60 is what i would describe as a rare condition when it comes to using hypothryroidism as an excuse for folk's weight problems. Without looking up the real figures, I understand that 10% of the population are clinically obese (myself included at one time) and a much higher percentage are overweight (as i am now). What is their excuse? :roll:

My excuse is laziness and bad diet, knowing your problem is half the battle.

[Drutt]

1.5% -2% of women over 60 is what i would describe as a rare condition when it comes to using hypothryroidism as an excuse for folk's weight problems. Without looking up the real figures, I understand that 10% of the population are clinically obese (myself included at one time) and a much higher percentage are overweight (as i am now). What is their excuse? :roll:

My excuse is laziness and bad diet, knowing your problem is half the battle.
I suggested that it wasn't a rare condition because strictly speaking it isn't - to be categorised as rare it should have an incidence of less than 0.05%, or less than 5 in 10,000 people. Hypothyroidism affects up to 40 times that number, so doesn't count as a rare disorder.

That said, you're right, few people who are overweight or obese have medical grounds for being so. Most overweight people, myself included, eat too much and move too little. The solution is eat less, move more. Easier said than done though!

Acknowledging your own overeating/undermoving is the first step. I believe that people who run slimming clubs feel pretty confident in their ability to spot those who'll lose weight and those who will not. People who immediately pipe up with excuses for their weight like 'big bones' or 'oh I hardly eat anything' have a greatly lowered chance of successfully losing weight, for they have failed to acknowledge their own responsibility for their weight.

Many of us appear to have lost all knowledge of adequate portion sizes. Food has become cheaper and cheaper, and overall we spend a significantly lower proportion of our net income on food compared with households of the 50s and 60s. We can afford to eat a lot, so we do. We could spend more money on less but good food, but instead we opt for supermarket special deals on ready meals and overprocessed junk that's laden with hidden sugar and salt. I haven't a clue how we turn it around.

[greeneyes]

My kids eat the same all good food plenty veg and fruit,not many fizzy drinks mainly water my boy is skinny but my girl chubby and i do put out less portion size for her than what my boy gets as he is more active always on the go and can get away with a few treats but although my girl goes to swimming,skips and out on the bike she is just made chubbier i always say they can have most things as long as it is always in moderation that being the key word.

What amazes me is other kids get nothing but junk food for their main meals and nothing but rubbish in between,some of my kids friends woundn't know what a good balanced meal was if it jumped up anf bit them!which i find very sad as it doesn't take any longer to make a meal from scratch than to get one out the freezer,some of these kids never get fruit.

Makes you wonder what the parents are teaching them about nutrition at home as to me this is where it should be learned.

[ktb50]

Margaret M.: Like I said before, do you actually have a thyroid disorder???????????

You dont' HAVE to loose or gain weight, its a symptom, but not everybody has the same symptoms.

I have had a thyroid problem for the last 11 years, I have not gained or lost any weight. I have 3 friends with underactive thyroids, only 1 gained a slight amount of weight.

When I go up the Thyroid clinic every month, its not full of overweight folk.

Yet again, I reckon its seen as a good excuse................

I agree with Drutt, peolpe have more money now,so we eat more, buy convience food and exercise less.

[Setanta]

This is more like a coming out forum. First we hear that thyroid problems are rare only to find out that nearly everyone posting has T problems. Strange I was beginning to think it might not be healthy to stay on this forum, could be catching ;) .
Rheghead told Squidge that she should go on a 2000 cal diet a day; do you want her to put on weight?? If she wants to loose some weight then she will have to come down to 1200, taken over the day in five portions. Up the exercise, swimming is not good for loosing weight it does the opposite.
As can be seen here some parents do try hard to make sure that their kids eat a healthy balanced diet. As far as I can make out none of their kids are obese which is what I was referring to in the beginning. So far I have read nothing that changes my view that obese children especially under the age of 10 is a crying shame on their (so called) parents [mad]

[©Amethyst]

Ok, squidge, but if you exercise regularly and STUCK to a diet which restricts you to 2000 calories per day then it is my belief that you will lose a lot of weight tag lag, providing of course that you are not one of the unfortunate few that suffers from one of those rare conditions that will make no difference to your best intentions.

From what I know of Squidge is that she seems pretty comfortable with her weight. Maybe she doesn't want to exercise regularly OR stick to a diet. Y'know, in some countries, like in Africa, she would be considered one of the most beautiful and desirable women around.

Why do we all have to stick to the countries warped infatuation with thinness?

I'm heavier now than I have been in all my life. But am still considered too thin, even by the doctors. I eat like a pig, and a large portion of my diet is made up of junk food. It always has. The only reason why I'm gaining weight is because I'm drinking a LOT of water and eating slightly larger portions (except for Sunday night where I had two full plates for dinner... lol). As for drinking socially every weekend - alcohol has never ever affected my weight.

Actually, I'm happy being heavier than I've ever been. Happier than I was when I weighed a stone less - only a month ago.

As for swimming, setanta. My chubby 10 year old brother lots a lot of weight last summer - mainly through swimming, and he didn't change his diet at all.

[weeboyagee]

...up the exercise, swimming is not good for loosing weight it does the opposite.

Sorry, Setanta, you're wrong there!! I'm living proof that swimming is good for loosing weight. However, it is well known that swimming is more commonly known as the best form of exercise - not the best form of loosing weight. It is the way you apply the exercise that is mis-understood. You can walk for miles at a dander pace and do very little in terms of burn-up of calories beyond that which you're body would naturally use anyway - it depends on your metabolism - so the level of exercise required to reduce weight will vary. My theory is that weight is equal to the result of calorie intake plus calorie type plus metobalism less exercise. Only my theory heh-heh!

I weighed 16.5 stones with a height of nearly 6ft. I don't smoke - I believe that this can have an affect on weight also. I had put the weight on over three years and previously was around about 13.5 - 14 stones. I had stopped exercising, partied a lot, ate a lot of junk snack food and drank a heck of a lot more too. I'm big built as people would say and can carry the weight without generally looking too heavy but at the end of 1999 I looked and felt huge! I picked a date for a diet and did it myself. 1000 calories or less a day, lots of healthy food - fruit, low calorie yoghurt, no sugar, no meat (red or white), lots of vegetables and a low calorie cereal breakfast but didn't have that during the week, and everything had to have a low fat content. I cut drink out (NOT ONE DROP!!! :~( ) for over three months. After two weeks there was a big difference. It was then I started going back to the pool (that was always my better sport). I set myself distance and time targets - so the benefit of the exercise had to increase! I started with breast stroke - and landed up doing up to 1.6km a night in 30mins (5 out of 7 nights) and about once a fortnight 4.8km distance in one go!! I then moved to crawl and over a period of time learned to tumble-turn and even tried progressing to Butterfly. I lost 3.5 stones in a period of 16 weeks and went through two changes of wardrobe in that time - cost me a fortune. The only thing I haven't said was that I had a rationed portion of pasta each day for energy - with the vegetables (and home made sauce with fresh tomatoes - not the high calorie ready made crosse and blackwell and the like). I landed up going along to the tri-club swimming sessions and joined in with them - eventually worked up to the fast lane!! I let it lapse a while back becuase of different reasons - and started eating snacks and drinking a lot again too - all to do with social life and I'm glad to say that after a big lecture from the doctor five weeks ago have decided to go back to doing what I did then - I'll keep you all posted, but I can assure you, if you can't stand the gym and you're prepared to push yourself in the pool - do it - you WILL loose weight - I have lost three quarters a stone in the past 5 weeks!!! :lol:

[Setanta]

...up the exercise, swimming is not good for loosing weight it does the opposite.

Sorry, Setanta, you're wrong there!! I'm living proof that swimming is good for loosing weight.
I landed up going along to the tri-club swimming sessions and joined in with them - eventually worked up to the fast lane!! I let it lapse a while back becuase of different reasons - and started eating snacks and drinking a lot again too - all to do with social life and I'm glad to say that after a big lecture from the doctor five weeks ago have decided to go back to doing what I did then - I'll keep you all posted, but I can assure you, if you can't stand the gym and you're prepared to push yourself in the pool - do it - you WILL loose weight - I have lost three quarters a stone in the past 5 weeks!!! :lol:

We are both correct here. Most people who say they go swimming as exercise dont but you do and thats the difference. You have to push yourself as you do for it to have any effect.

Good luck with the diet and the exercise, keeps us posted :o)

[Setanta]

[quote=Rheghead]As for swimming, setanta. My chubby 10 year old brother lots a lot of weight last summer - mainly through swimming, and he didn't change his diet at all.

Children change rapidly from month to month it is called growing. In regards to swimming see my comments to weeboyagee

[Donnie]

The most interesting part of the documentory I thought was when one of the people being interviewed said it was now socially unexceptable to smoke, but it was still okay to be fat even though in a few years time medical problems from being over weight will kill more people than smoking will......Mmmmmm something to be said there.....



They seemed to miss the part about smoking not only hurting the smoker but also the people they smoke around.

[lassieinfife]

Can I add my pennies worth here.... im under 60 am over weight, insulin dependant diabetic [inject4 times daily] have thyroid problems, hormones killing me,thank the lord and medical science for HRT,and also have to use steriods for my chest condition,I am a cook so try to stick to healthy diet,I walk to and from work everyday I dont have a car,rarely use busses but do cycle,do lots of dancing but still the weight stays with me,so dont condem us all as fatties and say its what we put in our mouths......unless u know the true facts of every fat person you see,so come on give us a break... we are harming no one unlike smolers and drunk drivers, if you dont like what you see when you look at us please just turn away
As to overweight kids all that is needed [ except in a few cases] is to look at their food intake and lack of excercise plus puters.......... schools should be made to keep PE in school courses

[squidge]

I swim between 20 and forty lengths at the pool three times a week depending how tired i am. The thyroid isssue is an issue but it isnt the only one. For me the worst thing about having an underactive thyroid is that if i dont take my medication i feel awful!!! tired panicky depressed and my life loses definition and meaning. And Amethyst im considered desireable here too. 2000 calories would have me the size of a bus Rheghead.

you shouldnt be judged by your size but by who you are

[©Amethyst]

And Amethyst im considered desireable here too.

Wasn't saying you're not - after all I've heard tales of your adventures. :p


2000 calories would have me the size of a bus Rheghead.

Indeed I am getting there and not even on 2000 cal per day!


you shouldnt be judged by your size but by who you are

Well said, dear! :) agree 100%

[misschief]

I find its a case of what I eat. I am about a stone overweight - alright 2 stone. From January to March this year I excercised three to four nights a week in the gym and the swimming pool. I ate in the region of 1500 calories a day and I lost not a jot. Had everything there is to test tested by the doctor and there was nothing physically wrong. Then in March I switched to the Atkins diet, under the doctors supervision. Lots of low carb fresh veg and meat. (Not all fat like some people eat or think you get to eat on the Atkins). I lost half a stone within three to four weeks and I am still losing, I feel better and have more energy. Also haven't made it to the gym in about a month so its not down to the excercise.

I found the carbs such as bread, pasta and rice just don't agree with me and my metabolism. :~( but I really like them which is a killer.

My advice to people who are struggling to lose weight is to try and cut different food types out of your diet, under the advice of a doctor

[linzy222]

My daughter is 15yrs old now and for all her life she has had chronic asthma, so she has been on steriods most of her life,which has made her a lot over weight.

She doesn't eat a lot really but people think she does coz of her weight,she gets bullied at school because of it to,but not everyone knows the right reason why people are big,and it gets me mad when kids especially pick on Fat people,it is so upsetting for the person who is getting abuse thrown at them!!

My daughter takes a lot of stress about her weight, but the stress makes her have an asthma attack and just a month ago she was rushed into wick general with an attack and was in the high dependancy room for 3nights, we thought we were going to lose her,

It is a dangerous game bullying!!