View Full Version : why are people nice then bad....
Hello everyone, me again. Was talking to a few mates and one says "so and so is saying this and that." what i dont understand is why are people like that? it seems no matter what i do for my friends i'll always be talked about in a bad way. Does that happen to many of you because i feel singled occasionally?
Hello everyone, me again. Was talking to a few mates and one says "so and so is saying this and that." what i dont understand is why are people like that? it seems no matter what i do for my friends i'll always be talked about in a bad way. Does that happen to many of you because i feel singled occasionally?
some folk,s will alway,s be like that. if they were true friend,s they would be honest and open, and not talk behind your back. just ignore it, it,s their loss anyway
:roll:
some folk,s will alway,s be like that. if they were true friend,s they would be honest and open, and not talk behind your back. just ignore it, it,s their loss anyway
:roll:
johno's right true friends wouldnt be like that, so try not to let it get to you i know that can be easier said than done sometimes.
a true friend is one that will tell you to your face any thing that they have a problem with (and vise versa) and then you work it out.. *laughs* my best mate will look me in the eye.. and say .." you dare! wear that and its not my fault you go out looking like a cow *winks*
but seriously.. backstabbers are not real friends.. they are just users..
when times gets tough that is when you learn who your real friends are
The easiest way is to let them slowly drift out of your life as I have done to a few and the friends you are left with are the ones that are worthwhile having.
Blazing Sporrans
16-Mar-07, 00:04
One thing I've learned in life is that no matter how much you want to make everybody like you, it won't work. As the others have been telling you, true friends are true friends regardless - even though you'll maybe fall out with them every now and again - friendship means you can see past your differences and respect one another. Anyone that can't do that isn't your friend and is certainly not worth you wasting your time, trouble and energy fretting over.
Valerie Campbell
16-Mar-07, 10:45
I know this is different because it was work, but I thought I'd become friends with a member of staff but she stabbed me in the back after I got a job at the school. So it happens in all walks of life I'm afraid. I know it's not nice though. A true friend will be honest with you and speak to you if they are unhappy about something that's been said or done. You're not alone and you are not being singled out.
I know this is different because it was work ... You're not alone and you are not being singled out.
I've had similar experiences at work. :(
I was working with 3 other women -2 were as sweet as pie to the third, but when she wasn't there they did nothing but criticise her and make jokes about her.
I was the newest recruit and I didn't join in any of this - but then I discovered that the third person had stabbed me in the back with our manager!
Sometimes I think people are two-faced because they desperately want everybody to like them and agree with them all the time, so they're nice to your face.
Don't worry too much about it Bloo - it is hurtful, but I'm sure most people have the same experiences.
cuddlepop
16-Mar-07, 11:21
Bloo from the "cradle to the grave" people will be two faced.
Just remember its much better being true to yourselve.These people ususlly behave like this because they want to be liked in the company their keeping.:)
Hello everyone, me again. Was talking to a few mates and one says "so and so is saying this and that." what i dont understand is why are people like that? it seems no matter what i do for my friends i'll always be talked about in a bad way. Does that happen to many of you because i feel singled occasionally?
Are you sure the "One" who said "so and so is saying this and that", is not stirring it, and is not really a true friend, that kind of thing happens in real life.
this sort of thing seems very common, especially in smaller communities - some people seem to have nothing better to do than gossip about others, and what they don't know they make up - can be very damaging.
Alice in Blunderland
16-Mar-07, 20:43
when times gets tough that is when you learn who your real friends are
I have found through experience that this is very, very true. :)
Caithness is terrible for this sort of thing, gossip and back stabbing. People often believe the first thing they hear. A few years ago, someone made a terrible accusation about a loved one and although this scumbag hadn't been in the county 5 minutes, they told as many people as would listen. Although anyone who knew us dismissed his story out of hand, there would have been some who believed this hurtful and frankly dangerous accusation. We consulted a lawyer to begin legal proceedings against him and we were told by the lawyer that we should tell as many people as we could the true story and the gossips would take over. Too be told this by someone in the legal proffession was quite surprising but although we never said a thing to anybody, the local community shunned these people and they eventually moved to another part of the county. It is easy to say to people, ignore things that people say but the stress and anguish that gossip and lies can cause is appalling. is is roughly 3 years since this happened and it still plays on our minds even though there was absolutely no wrong doing on my loved ones part, especially anytime we see the scumbag that started the whole thing off.
Hello everyone, me again. Was talking to a few mates and one says "so and so is saying this and that." what i dont understand is why are people like that? it seems no matter what i do for my friends i'll always be talked about in a bad way. Does that happen to many of you because i feel singled occasionally? It's the way of the world, get used to it!
the charlatans
17-Mar-07, 15:01
People that matter don't mind and people that mind don't matter.
Hard to stick to when you've been upset by someone but keep the heid up Bloo, i'm sure you have some lovely friends who should help you through this back stabbing.
anyone else got any more cliches?
ŠAmethyst
17-Mar-07, 16:03
It's the way of the world, get used to it!
Are you one of those people, lasher?
The_man_from_del_monte
17-Mar-07, 17:18
anyone else got any more cliches?
Who gives a stuff what others think.
Are you one of those people, lasher?
I agree lasher was a tad harsh, but it is a fact of life, and the younger generation have to learn from situations such as this and move on, being wrapped in cotton wool at this stage will not help in later life.
ŠAmethyst
17-Mar-07, 18:01
I agree lasher was a tad harsh, but it is a fact of life, and the younger generation have to learn from situations such as this and move on, being wrapped in cotton wool at this stage will not help in later life.
I agree with you, I've noticed that he's been a tad out of line on another thread, also. Not trying to allow the cotton wool wrapping, but more trying to let them know that I think that a mirror is needed and some behaviour adjusted.
I'd call myself a member of the younger generation, I'm in my early 20's... but I don't agree that we've been protected from the harsh stuff in society. I've gone through a lot in my short life... and know some who've had it worse.
Having your friend murdered in his own home at new year and being homeless kinda helps toughen you up. All the same, I'm sick of people being two-faced backstabbers and I don't think it's the way of the world as there are good people out there who say what they think and say it to your face. I happen to be one of those face telling folk... and all I was doing was telling it as I see it. Such a bad thing? Up to you.
I don't know whether or not you took part or watched comic relief last night?
Those people we are trying to help are the important people to worry about.
The people you have around you at the moment probably have nothing better to do.
I had people around me like that about 6 years ago and after having my son,my third child I realised that these unimportant little people didn't matter to me and that I was better off without them around me.
Some people not all,are a waste of your energy and friendship.Ditch the dirt and give someone who deserves a good mate the enregy instead.x
People always let you down and gossip, it's human nature. What I can't stand is jealousy among so called friends like if you get something nice or something good happens and they grudgingly offer some congratulations.
danc1ngwitch
17-Mar-07, 20:27
People will always do such things.
Some people no matter what you do for them, nomatter how nice you are to them will always downgrade you.
SPITE <<<< will see no bounds.
I have learned recently that you waste time on people like this and yes it is best to focus energy on those who need or deserve it.
( watching rednose last night makes you really see how lucky most of us are )
People are nice so they can see how bad they can be...
The_man_from_del_monte
17-Mar-07, 21:40
People always let you down and gossip, it's human nature.
Don't generalise Sweetpea, some of us stand by people through thick and thin and are not simply fairweather friends. I can honestly count my true friends on one hand and these are people that have been been friends for many many years through good and bad so please don't generalise and say that people "always" let you down.... "some people" let you down.
Don't generalise Sweetpea, some of us stand by people through thick and thin and are not simply fairweather friends. I can honestly count my true friends on one hand and these are people that have been been friends for many many years through good and bad so please don't generalise and say that people "always" let you down.... "some people" let you down.
I don't think I was generalising, I never said ALL people but in MY experience people do let you down for whatever reason. The only person you can be true to is yourself.
The_man_from_del_monte
17-Mar-07, 21:54
The only person you can be true to is yourself.
If you have the idea that people will always let you down or experience of people letting you down then maybe you've grown to believe that the only person you can be true to is yourself... shame if all you've come across in your life are unreliable people who let you down but there are quite a lot of good uns out there, hope you come across a few soon :)
If you have the idea that people will always let you down or experience of people letting you down then maybe you've grown to believe that the only person you can be true to is yourself... shame if all you've come across in your life are unreliable people who let you down but there are quite a lot of good uns out there, hope you come across a few soon :)
I have plenty of good friends but I'm not naive enough to think they are infallible, neither am I, I've put my foot in it with some of my best mates or let slip things to people I shouldn't have and we have stopped talking then started again. And like I said from day 1 I have been let down so I'm aware of the power of being 'let down'. As long as it doesn't 'get you down'!
The_man_from_del_monte
17-Mar-07, 22:13
As long as it doesn't 'get you down'!
Other people will never get me down, I manage to do that all by myself, but other people can sometimes help pick me up ;)
but other people can sometimes help pick me up ;)[/quote]
True I get carried a lot by my mates. Coming out of skinandi's usually lol
Powered by vBulletin® Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.