Should Prospective Parents Have to Sit a Test? [Archive]

JAWS

12-Nov-06, 04:59

Now that would be a good idea but I suspect the thread was meant to be more judgemental than helpful, Colin!

There doesn't seem to be the same support from the surrounding community that was there at one time.
People would rather sit back and make smug judgements rather than offer help and advice.

Colin Manson

12-Nov-06, 05:11

Never!

Surely it was intended in good faith to be an interesting topic of conversation and lively debate :eek:

I’m aghast, time for bed I think.

JAWS

12-Nov-06, 05:43

I hope you are right Colin. If I've misjudged the situation then I apologise without reservation.

My view was possibly coloured by the obvious intent of some other threads.

brandy

12-Nov-06, 09:00

there are parentcraft classes in wick.. done by the local midwifes.
i went with my first baby and really enjoyed them actually.even though i had been around kids my whole life and actually worked with children before i came over here.. i found it to be a whole new world when i brought my baby home.
i remeber calling my mom.. in america.. when i came home from the hospital sayign.. mama what do i do?
*grins*

SandTiger

12-Nov-06, 09:34

Now that would be a good idea but I suspect the thread was meant to be more judgemental than helpful, Colin!
...

I think you're probably reading too much into the post Jaws - It is a simple question with no attempt to lead or judge whatsoever - Despite it having a tenious link to some other threads which therefore keeps it 'on topic' - Hope that helps?

Tristan

12-Nov-06, 10:18

I think you're probably reading too much into the post Jaws - It is a simple question with no attempt to lead or judge whatsoever - Despite it having a tenious link to some other threads which therefore keeps it 'on topic' - Hope that helps?

I think this and the other threads were and are very interesting. Both cover issues that affect Caithness/Scottish/British society today.
Giving prospective parents a course on how to parent would probably help, heck I have been parenting for a few years now and I have to find new and interesting ways to support the children all the time.
Getting a leg up at the start can only be a good thing.

percy toboggan

12-Nov-06, 11:03

they should get that dummy baby home that keeps them awake all night and you have to get up till feed it just see how long it would last they would think twice about it .

There was a really good play on BBC radio 4 last wednesday on this very subject. Go to the website if you want to listen agaijn - illuminating and poignant.

As for the poll, I went against my initial instinct and voted NO! Do we really want only certain stratas of society to have children? I think not. This smacks too much of social engineering. It also suggests that people cannot progress beyond their birth 'station' . This is an Ugly and frightening concept in my opinion.

funky-dunky

12-Nov-06, 11:43

they should get that dummy baby home that keeps them awake all night and you have to get up till feed it just see how long it would last they would think twice about it .

well thats where you are wrong as i had the baby home for over half a year and never put me off it i actually loved doing it.

krieve

12-Nov-06, 12:26

Yeah but that only covers the worst case scenario, I've only had to stay up once with the baby and that was when he had a cold.

Rest of the time it's easy, just lots of work
Your very lucky then that you have only had to stay up once and it was when he had a cold.
I wasn't so lucky my baby would wake me up 2/3 times a night and it didn't just last a couple of weeks, he was 18 months before he slept all night :~( It was no fun and yes i was 17. He was 7 last week omg [lol] .

Rheghead

12-Nov-06, 12:28

How does having a baby make your driving deteriate? What is more appropriate is that we all should have a retest every 10 years.

Venture

12-Nov-06, 12:30

There's a big difference between a doll and the real thing. When you know its a doll you act differently. This might be a good idea for learning how to handle it, dress it etc. but when it comes to dealing with not knowing why its screaming then thats a different story.

Billy Boy

12-Nov-06, 12:49

Your very lucky then that you have only had to stay up once and it was when he had a cold.
I wasn't so lucky my baby would wake me up 2/3 times a night and it didn't just last a couple of weeks, he was 18 months before he slept all night :~( It was no fun and yes i was 17. He was 7 last week omg .

lol, if you think you had it hard, my daughter suffered from severe eczma from about 3 months old and was up every night sometime 5/6 times a night and that went on until just before she went to school, even now she sometimes wakes at night, but being a bit older she will go back to sleep after we put cream on her skin. But i wouldnt swap her for anything in the world:)

Venture

12-Nov-06, 12:58

Am I right in saying FUNKY-DUNKY that you posted on here that you are having twin girls and you are only sixteen? Maybe you should of had two of the dummy babies. Dont envy you its hard enough with one. Hope you have plenty of help from the babies Dad or your Mum....you'll need it.

Dreadnought

12-Nov-06, 13:05

Q1. Are you older than 18?

Q2. Are you in a stable relationship?

Q3. (multiple choice) Where do babies come from?

A. I think you catch them from kissing.

B. The stork brings them.

C. They are the result of sexual intercourse between consenting adults of opposite sexes.

D. My cousin, Shaneekwah, said hers came from Jack Daniels.

Q4. (multiple choice) Your baby is crying, what do you do?

A. Scream and shout at each other until one of you goes off in a huff shouting 'Right yor dumpt, Ricky fancies me anyway so I dun need yoo, an anyway yoo ain't even the dad'.

B. Finish off the vodka redbull from last night's party.

C. 'Ave a fag an wait til it stops.

D. Feed/change/wind baby as necessary.

Q5. Baby won't sleep, what do you do?

A. Check baby doesn't need winding/changing/feeding.

B. Roll over and pull blankets over your head pretending to sleep while waiting for your partner to get up.

C. Both get up and shout and scream at each other just to make sure the neighbours are sharing the joy.

Niall Fernie

12-Nov-06, 13:09

Its been a long week...

I read the title as "Should prospective posters have to sit a test?"

However I misread things, now that I see what the thread is about, I think that the test should be the same.

Along the lines of:

Can they read and understand simple instructions?

Can they empathise with the feelings of other people?

Do they snap and resort to violent outbursts under the slightest pressure?

brandy

12-Nov-06, 13:25

on question 5 that can easily be all of teh above..
you lay in bed.. praying hubby will get up.. when he dosent.. you get up making enough noise and grumbling to make sure he is awake and misreble with you!
and gurn at each other as it is now 3 am and you have had at most 45 min of sleep. and if you cant sleep neither can he! then you go get baby change feed and wind.. and as baby is settling back down asleep in your arms you look at each other and think .. ahhh it is worth it after all!

cuddlepop

12-Nov-06, 13:34

I'm going to say no they shouldn't be asked to sit a test.
In all honesty ever single day with a child can be a test and know paper exercise can prepare you for the outcomes of bringing up baby.:roll:
Help,support and guidence are far more help to prospective parents than ticks in a box.

unicorn

12-Nov-06, 14:20

As it's been a while since I was pregnant I don't know how things work now but I think practical parenting classes beforehand can do no harm, If you have never bathed a newborn it can be a very scary thing to do. Just learing about the simple things can be a great help.

krieve

12-Nov-06, 15:02

lol, if you think you had it hard, my daughter suffered from severe eczema from about 3 months old and was up every night sometime 5/6 times a night and that went on until just before she went to school, even now she sometimes wakes at night, but being a bit older she will go back to sleep after we put cream on her skin. But i wouldnt swap her for anything in the world:)
Oh so does my boy have severe eczema and asthma, Luckily the eczema got abit better at about 3 but the asthma is worse... I never said i had it hard.

_Ju_

12-Nov-06, 15:28

How does having a baby make your driving deteriate? What is more appropriate is that we all should have a retest every 10 years.

Either you have never driven with toddlers, are "auditorily" challenged or have done so such a long time ago you canna remember! Try driving with a couple of children demanding attention or a baby screaming blue murder on the back seat and see how well your driving ability does![lol] [lol]

_Ju_

12-Nov-06, 15:32

Don't understand the point of the test. The test is for prospective parents, so they will already be pregnant and baby will be here within 9 months. Unless the baby is supposed to be removed if they fail?

mums angels

12-Nov-06, 19:41

I think that prospective parents of ALL ages shoud attend a parenting class (classes are available)but not a test...what you going to do if thay fail make them give the baby up have a termination???

I answered yes in the poll but only meaning the parenting classses

Billy Boy

12-Nov-06, 20:07

Oh so does my boy have severe eczema and asthma, Luckily the eczema got abit better at about 3 but the asthma is worse... I never said i had it hard.

sorry didnt mean to imply it like that, i know what you mean about the asthma we have just had it confirmed that our wee one has asthma after taking an attack and having difficulty trying to breath, they had to put her on a nebuliser and give her steroid tablets the same strength as the ones i was on.
I'm sure you'll agree that no matter how good a parent you are you are never prepared for things like this

Cazaa

12-Nov-06, 20:08

What if our parents sat the test now . . . and they failed! Would they have to give us back?

I know the trial that is adopting a child. I know couples who've been refused for purile reasons. Why don't other couples have to go through a similar test to prove they are 'worthy' of having children of their own?

grumpyhippo

12-Nov-06, 21:38

A universal contaceptive should be put in the water supply. You can get the antidote only when you successfully complete appropriate training.

pultneytooner

12-Nov-06, 21:55

And what happens to those who don't pass?
Maybe they would be sterilised.
Everybody has the right to have a child it's up to the grandparents to educate as to how that child is brought up.

mums angels

12-Nov-06, 22:31

Maybe they would be sterilised.
Everybody has the right to have a child it's up to the grandparents to educate as to how that child is brought up.

I certainly would keep my childrens granparents out of the subject of how they were raised i don't think they did that good a job of their own lot (not my parents of course..HIS..he turned out well but some of the others..EEK)

pultneytooner

12-Nov-06, 23:11

Which brings me to a point which was brought up by a workmate/friend of mine that has a disability.
A mate of his who is also disabled heard a discussion on tv as to whether if a parent/parents, knew that their child was going to have a disability then should they be able to terminate that pregnancy.
My workmate has a disability but has been able to lead a very productive life.
He, since leaving school, has always had a job, has never been in troule with the police and has never commited a criminal offence.
When you see some of the so-called, 'normal', people then you begin to wonder, who has the most right to live.

JAWS

12-Nov-06, 23:29

A universal contaceptive should be put in the water supply. You can get the antidote only when you successfully complete appropriate training.Ah, success at last! We can have the Master Race without having the nasty problem of disposing of those who do not conform to our ideals!

One question that does cross my mind is just who will it be who makes all the Rules and Decisions about who is fit to be a Parent?
Who amongst you consider yourselves perfect enough to play God and by what qualifications?
I for one have never met a single person or group of people who I would trust with the job.

Any volunteers who think they are wise enough to make the Rules and the Decisions?

Any body seen a man with a little moustache wandering round anywhere? It sounds like he found the secret of Eternal Life! It certainly seems that his aims have survived. Once we have the Master Race we can Rule the World!

Once we have created the Master Race we can Rule the World!
Mien Fuhrer, I will follow you anywhere, even unto the Gates of Hell!
But not in this lifetime!

grumpyhippo

13-Nov-06, 00:27

!

Once we have created the Master Race we can Rule the World!

Now we're talking!! Would you like to design the uniforms:lol: :lol:

bobsgirl

13-Nov-06, 19:04

I have done on of these parenting classes when I had my little boy and I will say it was really helpful. Hubby came with me and he really enjoyed it too.
The midwives had answers to any queries and they were good at reassuring you that everything will be ok.
These classes are there to be used so yes I think that people that are having or planning to start a family should go to classes like these!
If anything you will meet people in the same position as yourself and hopefully make lifetime buddies!! Well required!!!

Ricco

13-Nov-06, 20:12

Definitely. You have to have a licence to drive a car, a licence to shoot a gun; you have to be over 18 to buy a drink in a pub, or to go to war; but you can go out and bring loads of children into the world regardless of any age, licence, common sense, parental training, ability to support them, ability to bring them up 'proper'... and foist off the responsibility and problems onto others and the state.

I know, I know... what a strom of protest that will cause, but think about it - its true. :confused

JAWS

14-Nov-06, 00:23

A slight case of exaggeration, methinks. :roll:

Bobinovich

14-Nov-06, 00:30

Yes I do think a parenting test (actually a course) is a good idea, but it really needs to start in High School to ensure that both girls and boys are made to understand what creating a new life actually means.

After a series of intensive classes where they are shown the trials and tribulations of pregnancy (so they can see both the emotional and physical sides), through seeing parents with sleepless nights, rocking baby to sleep while 'dead' on their feet, etc, say up to the end of the first year. Off course they should also see the joys of parenting such as first smile, steps, etc. as these are also important emotional moments.

By this point they should realise that there is a whole rollercoaster ride awaiting them. Then you hit them with a week each with one of these 'intelligent infants' which are used on TV. Full of microchips which monitor how you are coping and rate you impartialy.

At the end of it give them a written test - some multiple choice followed by an essay.

This year-long course, just one period a week, would hopefully make kids realise their responsibilities at an early(ish) age to ensure they make informed decisions about, and take responsibility for, their sexual activity.

hobbes1962

14-Nov-06, 07:07

My hubbie has a theory that everyone should be sterilised at birth and you would need to pass an exam to have it reversed and only when you and your partner were secure and happy together. After seeing some parents (not the majority so please don't shoot me), I would tend to agree with this.