The Ten Commandments Of Stella

[pultneytooner]

Live your life by these ten commandments and you may not be a better person but you'll have a bloody good time

1. NEVER go to the pub for just 2 pints of Stella, it will inevitably lead to more. To avoid lying just don't say your going for a couple. Use the philosophy "ALL OR NOTHING".

2. NEVER plan where or what you are going to do in an evening when drinking Stella as you will more than likely end up in a place you never expected.

3. NEVER drink another man's Stella without their permission. A man's pint is his castle.

4. NEVER try to drink a different lager after Stella, it just won't satisfy you and will leave a bad taste in your mouth.

5. NEVER trust a Tennents or McEwans lager drinker. They only drink inferior alcoholic substances as they cannot afford nor handle the effects of the more sophisticated substance which is Stella Artois.

6. ALWAYS ensure that a bad pint of Stella is reported to the official Stella Appreciation Society Board of Complaints Commission. The psychological consequences of a bad pint of Stella must never be underestimated and any establishment found selling such an inferior pint will be fully investigated under the the rules of the S.A.S. Commission Board Chapter IX.III.

7. ALWAYS use Stella Artois as a hangover cure. It is the best hangover cure know to mankind as discovered under S.A.S. Experiment No.32.

8. ALWAYS have faith in the Lord Sebastien of Leuven. If funds are running low and you are a trully deserving Stella drinker you will be rewarded with beer tokens from somewhere.

9. ALWAYS treat your fellow Stella drinkers as your brothers and sisters.

10.ALWAYS use Stella Artois to assist you in any task you undertake. The quest for enlightenment and fulfillment will always be answered by the Lady of Leuven.

[percy toboggan]

Well I'm drinking 'Dimberger' lager tonight. 5.1% and re-assuringly cheap. It also reminds me of 'The Dambusters' for some reason- must be having an effect!

Tastes good. Only contains barley, wheat and hops - so it's just liquid muesli really - healthy !
Eight for a fiver.
Seriously, I'm no lover of Stella Artois. I'm usually a bitter man anyway, though you'd never guess from my posts.

[willowbankbear]

Live your life by these ten commandments and you may not be a better person but you'll have a bloody good time

1. NEVER go to the pub for just 2 pints of Stella, it will inevitably lead to more. To avoid lying just don't say your going for a couple. Use the philosophy "ALL OR NOTHING".

2. NEVER plan where or what you are going to do in an evening when drinking Stella as you will more than likely end up in a place you never expected.

3. NEVER drink another man's Stella without their permission. A man's pint is his castle.

4. NEVER try to drink a different lager after Stella, it just won't satisfy you and will leave a bad taste in your mouth.

5. NEVER trust a Tennents or McEwans lager drinker. They only drink inferior alcoholic substances as they cannot afford nor handle the effects of the more sophisticated substance which is Stella Artois.

6. ALWAYS ensure that a bad pint of Stella is reported to the official Stella Appreciation Society Board of Complaints Commission. The psychological consequences of a bad pint of Stella must never be underestimated and any establishment found selling such an inferior pint will be fully investigated under the the rules of the S.A.S. Commission Board Chapter IX.III.

7. ALWAYS use Stella Artois as a hangover cure. It is the best hangover cure know to mankind as discovered under S.A.S. Experiment No.32.

8. ALWAYS have faith in the Lord Sebastien of Leuven. If funds are running low and you are a trully deserving Stella drinker you will be rewarded with beer tokens from somewhere.

9. ALWAYS treat your fellow Stella drinkers as your brothers and sisters.

10.ALWAYS use Stella Artois to assist you in any task you undertake. The quest for enlightenment and fulfillment will always be answered by the Lady of Leuven.

classic man, just on my 2nd tin:Razz

[pultneytooner]

Well I'm drinking 'Dimberger' lager tonight. 5.1% and re-assuringly cheap. It also reminds me of 'The Dambusters' for some reason- must be having an effect!

Tastes good. Only contains barley, wheat and hops - so it's just liquid muesli really - healthy !
Eight for a fiver.
Seriously, I'm no lover of Stella Artois. I'm usually a bitter man anyway, though you'd never guess from my posts.
Bitter, never.;)

[Billy Boy]

1. NEVER go to the pub for just 2 pints of Stella, it will inevitably lead to more. To avoid lying just don't say your going for a couple. Use the philosophy "ALL OR NOTHING".

lol that's been my motto since i was knee high to a grass hopper[lol]

[halkirk1]

Reminded me of this one:

Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer and suggested that men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption.

The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women.

To test the theory, 100 men drank 8 pints of beer each, within a 1 hour period. It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects:

1) Argued over nothing.

2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.

3) Gained weight.

4) Talked excessively without making sense.

5) Became overly emotional.

6) Couldn't drive.

7) Failed to think rationally

8) Had to sit down while urinating.

No further testing was considered necessary.

[Lolabelle]

Ha, ha, ha, loved it, an absolute crack up!!!

[percy toboggan]

Sober now! The 'Dimberger' is in fact 'DAMBURGER'
Now I know why it reminded me of bouncing bombs !
lovely drink. Another two tonight & a case to take to Morar/Mallaig next week.
I'm such a lucky chap.

[Billy Boy]

Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.

[percy toboggan]

Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.

I'm well on the way. And frankly, I no longer care <hic>
what's the feminine of percy?
Mind you, I couldn't sup six pints in less than ten hours anymore. :confused
Ten hour supping sessions were fine once, now I'd need a kip halfway:D

[sam]

maybe the female version of percy is percina lol:lol:

[Cedric Farthsbottom III]

Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that 100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is planned.


Classic....heehee.....absolute class.:lol: :lol: