View Full Version : Humpty Dumpty .. Fall or Pushed ??
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 01:47
Well, seeing as we are discussing recent historical events I want to bring to light the tragic death of Mr Humpty. No one seems to care for this poor egg who was cut down in the prime of his youth, he had at least two weeks to go on his "Best Before" date when he plummeted to his death. Was it a Government conspiracy involving ALL the Kings men or a just a renegade faction who wanted to stop Humpty speaking out about supposed Weapons of Mass Destruction, the rumours about the Kings Men Chemical Weapon Horse Cavalry and Utterly Indiscriminate Airstrike Force still persist.
Just why was Humpty sitting on that wall ??, was he waiting for the mysterious I.M Rothschild who was enquiring about Humpty only days before ??, did the Israeli Underwater Formation Gymnastics Squad seen in the area just before his final plunge know more than they are letting on ??,or is it simply a case of Humpty being blitzed out of his tree on Buckfast and Vodka and simply falling off as reported by local teenage drunkards ??, or, shockingly, was he in the sights of far more sinister forces such as the shadowy "Them" ??, no one knows if "Them" even exist. Some individuals have been accused of being "Them" but on further investigation claimed not be "Them" but "Us". These shadowy groups are everywhere and there are more of them than we thought !!
I propose that Humpty was a victim of a shadowy conspiracy, the type of which we have never seen. A cover up on this scale has not been seen since Snow White was portrayed as a kind carer of seven dwarves and not the brazen hussy with a voracious sexual appetite for the vertically challenged that "truth tellers" suggests she actually was.
I want justice for Humpty .. if you have any information please let me know, with your help, a lot of kindness, and a truckload of adhesive tape we can put Humpty together again and get to the truth. Sadly he will only ever be a shell of what he was before but still, we must try.
Thank You.
In the Interests of your security this post will self destruct ten seconds after you have read this.
Boozeburglar
25-May-10, 01:48
Lol! x100!
In the Interests of your security this post will self destruct ten seconds after you have read this.
That is 9 seconds more than my "Mary had a little lamb" post lasted before being removed
Aaldtimer
25-May-10, 02:58
:confusedHumpty Dumpty
Humpity Dumpty was pushed, head over heels all over the wall
Humpity Dumpty was pushed, nobody knew it at all
All the king's horses and all the king's men
Gathered around and kicked him again
Then they sent for the press and a couple of friends
And knelt on the ground and they chanted amen
Humpity Dumpty was pushed, head over heels all over the wall
Humpity Dumpty was pushed nobody knew it at all
The following morning the headlines would tell
Really it was inevitable
Mr Dumpty was drunk, and he fell from the wall
And perhaps a bit cracked and shell-shocked and all
Humpity Dumpty was pushed , head over heels all over the wall
Humpity Dumpty was pushed nobody knew it at all
They wrote in the papers, they wrote in the news
They wrote it in all of the history books
They wrote it in blood and they knew it would stick
And I swallowed it all and I nearly got sick
They took me to hospital, put me in bed
They took off my clothes and examined my head
You're poisoned, you're poisoned, with needles they said
My system rejected the things I was fed
Humpity Dumpty was pushed, head over heels all over the wall
Humpity Dumpty was pushed, nobody knew it at all
They took me from there and they called me insane
The walls they were padded the door it was chained
Then they took me from there and they put me in jail
For electing that life I suffered in shame
I cried every night and I slept every day
And I waited for someone to take me away
Nothing was right and nothing was wrong
Until I was forced for to learn this knew song
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the king's horses and all the king's men
……You know the rest……………
Tommy Sands (Irish folk singer):confused
Metalattakk
25-May-10, 03:13
That is 9 seconds more than my "Mary had a little lamb" post lasted before being removed
It wasn't "removed". It was simply "moved". ;)
Boozeburglar
25-May-10, 03:16
It moved me.
northener
25-May-10, 07:02
That is 9 seconds more than my "Mary had a little lamb" post lasted before being removed
That musta been a good one then!
Care to post it again? I missed it first time around.:cool:
northener
25-May-10, 07:04
Anyway, I heard the dish and the spoon have been 'at it like knives' and will probably run away together.
I'm sorry I cant help, I'm still somewhat undecided as to the cause of the actual fall. Could it have been the state of the wall? Has anyone looked into this? Health and Safety for example.
What do you make of this I picked up from a French newspaper -
Homme petit d'homme petit, s'attend, n'avale
Homme petit d'homme petit, a degres de begue folles
Anal deux qui noeuds ours, anal deux qui noeunds s'y menent
Coup d'un poux tome petit tout guetteur a gaine.
It looks as though the French are no further on with their investigation either.......
Trinkie
Mr Duck, you are either very brave or very stupid!
To go and unearth such a thing as this is.....incredulous to say the least.
If 'They' haven't already found you, I would suggest you start running and keep a good eye out for the Black helicopters.
What a can of worms you have opened! :eek::eek::eek:
I understand from certain sources that a sheep of a non white persuasion was involved in the incident but it is yet unclear if their intentions were criminal, however there was a yoof from down a lane nearby that was known to be handling 'bags' of a substance delivered by said sheep.
Furthermore there was also a shadowy underworld character implicated, known as 'the ugly duckling' he has a reputation for disguise and changing his appearance.
Around the same time I am led to believe that a major structural failure of a bridge in the London area was thought to be due to terrorist activity!!
A link to a faction led by someone known as the 'fair lady' was indicated.
I fear that this can of worms will not end here. You really don't know what you have done.
Maybe the same people who built Tesco's Wall, built humptys wall too:lol:
northener
25-May-10, 09:28
I'm sorry I cant help, I'm still somewhat undecided as to the cause of the actual fall. Could it have been the state of the wall? Has anyone looked into this? Health and Safety for example.
.............Trinkie
Good God:eek:
You've got it nailed, methinks.
Humpty was sat on the drystane wall at Tescos!!!!
Said 'poorly constructed' wall collapsed (the evidence is still there, look at the wall by the fuel pumps) dumping Mr H Dumpty down the embankment where he was buried under the avalanche of following bits of wall.
All looks like a tragic accident brought about by Tescos' scrimping on the wall-building budget, doesn't it?
Not so, my unintelligent chums. I am constructing a website that will show that the wall had explosives placed in it to make it look like an accidental collapse. If you look at the wall in question, you will see that another section has 'collapsed' by the pedestrian access.
Coincidence? I think not. There are those that will try to pull the wool over your eyes by saying that the two incidents are unrelated - or at best the second collapse was brought about by shockwaves from the first. But I will have conclusive proof that these two 'collapses' are the product of the same evil manipulation, as soon as i work out what that proof is.
It is a well known fack that Jack and Jill were walking up the pedestrian access hill at the time of the second 'collapse'....and we all know what happened to Jack, don't we?
He came tumbling down!!!!:eek:
More evidence that will show you unintelligent people that there are forces at work in the world that only I am capable of understanding. Only I know the reasons behind these evil goings-on..and I will only reveal them to people who agree with me.
Fall in line, sycophants! For I am omniscient!
Hear Me! Hear Me and weep!
(sounds of deluded raving fading into distance.....)
:cool:
There have been a few sulphurous rumours that he was a throughly bad egg.
Further research from the tinterweb brings about some interesting revelations.
The AP (Mr Dumpty) was never on any wall, never mind the alleged 'poorly' constructed wall owned by Mr Leahy. (there is a tenuous connection between Mr Leahy and the org's own Anfield, possibly they are one and the same:eek:!!)
Even though Mr Leahy has connections with a former PM Bliar of WMD fame there is little concrete evidence to connect him directly with Mr Dumpty's demise. The evidence seems to be rather wobbly to say the least.
The truth is that Mr Dumpty's place of death was in PORTGOWER! :eek::eek:
His remains were moved in an elaborate conspiracy by the Zionist's, Muslim extremist's and Little Boy Blue.
FACT!
By virtue I 'ave 'ritten it on tinterweb it must now be true!
Not to mention "Mary,Mary,quite contrary," who I am assured, despite all her denials had a more than a finger in this plum pie.
John Little
25-May-10, 10:47
Further research from the tinterweb brings about some interesting revelations.
The AP (Mr Dumpty) was never on any wall, never mind the alleged 'poorly' constructed wall owned by Mr Leahy. (there is a tenuous connection between Mr Leahy and the org's own Anfield, possibly they are one and the same:eek:!!)
Even though Mr Leahy has connections with a former PM Bliar of WMD fame there is little concrete evidence to connect him directly with Mr Dumpty's demise. The evidence seems to be rather wobbly to say the least.
The truth is that Mr Dumpty's place of death was in PORTGOWER! :eek::eek:
His remains were moved in an elaborate conspiracy by the Zionist's, Muslim extremist's and Little Boy Blue.
FACT!
By virtue I 'ave 'ritten it on tinterweb it must now be true!
That is really interesting! Were there Rothschilds involved as well?
Trinkie I am truly shocked! I never had you down as bein homophonic! :(
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 11:08
Having delved deeper I think Phill may be right. Into my possession has come a crime scene photograph of Humpties demise. As can be clearly seen .. there is no wall !!
http://img34.imageshack.us/img34/2748/picture127r.jpg
Attention has focused on All the Kings Men. Some of their military Engineer types were overhead discussing scrambled eggs recipies and they are experts in explosive detonation. They also have a history of egg abuse and are currently under investigation by Eggnesty International for sickening crimes against defenceless egss. There are claims that they boil them, cut their heads off and then eat the contents. This sickening picture of egg abuse was taken covertly at great risk to the photgrapher. He later ended up in a cheese and tomato omelette for his defiance.
http://img708.imageshack.us/img708/6746/eggcup.jpg
It is not unfeasible that a very carefully planned detonation, using jet fuel, vapourised the structure that Humpty was sitting on. I would check this with Northerner but he was last seen heading into the hills wearing nought but a pair of wellies, a tiger skin thong and an old World War 2 tin hat while muttering about snipers in his garden.
I would urge caution investigating this matter my fellow Orgers, I have just had a visit from the "Egg Advisory Board", unless they now carry MP5's and dress like they are getting ready to storm the Iranian Embassy I fear my life may now be in danger. Or perhaps my visitors were dressed from head to toe in black to shield them from the sunlight ?? .. all I know is .. its getting dangerous.
Be careful out there.
That is really interesting! Were there Rothschilds involved as well?
Oh you bet! Them along with Abu Hamza and the Former 'Grand old' Duke of York, now known as Andy 'half mil' Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glücksburg-Gogo-Goch.
The AP (Mr Dumpty) was never on any wall, never mind the alleged 'poorly' constructed wall owned by Mr Leahy. (there is a tenuous connection between Mr Leahy and the org's own Anfield, possibly they are one and the same:eek:!!)
Although, I do have a few things in common with SIR Terence Leahy (He will get his peerage when Cameron's cabinet gets their discount cards)
there is one big difference.
He supports Everton!
Returning back to thread, why is HD not being represented by a "Personal Injuries" shyster solicitor?
As he is clearly not now able to use telephone or keyboard, I did a search for him (keywords: personal injuries compensation) which returned more than 76,000 results in UK alone. Sadly nobody can offer help for his injuries.
I have now passed his details on to Max Clifford & Sarah Ferguson, maybe they can get a few quid for him
I would check this with Northerner but he was last seen heading into the hills wearing nought but a pair of wellies, a tiger skin thong and an old World War 2 tin hat while muttering about snipers in his garden.
Don't worry, that's normal. Just leave some tins of cider out and he'll soon be back.
I never knew he drank until I saw him sober!!
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 11:29
Although, I do have a few things in common with SIR Terence Leahy (He will get his peerage when Cameron's cabinet gets their discount cards)
there is one big difference.
He supports Everton!
Returning back to thread, why is HD not being represented by a "Personal Injuries" shyster solicitor?
As he is clearly not now able to use telephone or keyboard, I did a search for him (keywords: personal injuries compensation) which returned more than 76,000 results in UK alone. Sadly nobody can offer help for his injuries.
I have now passed his details on to Max Clifford & Sarah Ferguson, maybe they can get a few quid for him
The plot thickens though.
Sarah Ferguson was recently seen asking for £500,000 to gain access to Prince Andrew, a man who has ten thousand men. And is known to be ruthless enough to march them all the way up to the top and all the way down again. Could these be the "All the Kings Men" that are suspected in the death of Humpty ??
Could it be that the architects of Humptie's demise were actually the ones filmed in that Hotel room bribing a former member of the Royal family in order to use his men to commit eggicide??, in fact are the Royals themselves involved ??
Note too that the meeting took place at night and the curtains were closed to eliminate any last beams of daylight, this could indicate our shadowy friends in Portgower. After my meeting this morning with the figures in black, one of whom called me a "cheel" and threatened to "burst me" if I didn't "ha'd my tongue" I am certain that dark forces are afoot here. I am frightened for my safety, and quite possibly my bottom. I don't what someone intending to "burst ye" entails.
John Little
25-May-10, 11:31
The Caithness Illuminati are after ye - incomer!!
The plot thickens though.
Sarah Ferguson was recently seen asking for £500,000 to gain access to Prince Andrew, a man who has ten thousand men. And is known to be ruthless enough to march them all the way up to the top and all the way down again. Could these be the "All the Kings Men" that are suspected in the death of Humpty ??
Could it be that the architects of Humptie's demise were actually the ones filmed in that Hotel room bribing a former member of the Royal family in order to use his men to commit eggicide??, in fact are the Royals themselves involved ??
Note too that the meeting took place at night and the curtains were closed to eliminate any last beams of daylight, this could indicate our shadowy friends in Portgower. After my meeting this morning with the figures in black, one of whom called me a "cheel" and threatened to "burst me" if I didn't "ha'd my tongue" I am certain that dark forces are afoot here. I am frightened for my safety, and quite possibly my bottom. I don't what someone intending to "burst ye" entails.
But were Airmiles Andy's men soldiers or golfers?.
The evidence suggests golfers, as the photo clearly shows that damage to his skull was not an accurate assasination but was more likely caused by a blunt instrument i.e. a golf club.
The theory that "Toe Job Fergie" was also involved is plausible.
It has been said that she has a face that can crack eggs, so is this another modus operandi that needs looking into to see if there is a link with other unsolved murders e.g. Bambi, Cock Robin and so on
was mr dumpty Stavro? if so i know his first name
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 13:11
The Caithness Illuminati are after ye - incomer!!
Blimey .. they have Illumanti in Caithness already ??
That was quick .. they even beat Asda up there .. ;)
Had to laugh at me being called an Incomer John, the last time that happened in Wick was just before I moved away. As the guy lectured me on my incomer status etc etc I just reminded him that we sat in the same class in Wick High School !!
The old Drunken Duck who sat on a wall
got stuck up there and began to bawl
First to the Master and then to the Dame
And Three Blind Mice who all look the same
But Little Boy Blue, so little it's true
Kissed Cinderella and took off her shoe
While his old friend Polly the kettle put on
Then to Market he went with his son John
But Hey Diddle Diddle - who's that on the Fiddle?
And who's jumped over the corn?
Is it Little Jack Horner who came out of the corner
Now wishing he never was born.
But the Old Drunken Duck was stuck on the Wall
And like Humpty Dumpty he just had to fall !
But did he fall or was he pushed
His knees I see are both rather bruished .
Humpty Dumpty committed suicide. From a young age his Mother had drummed into him the following maxim:-
"Son, only people with square arses should try sitting on walls"
Further information gained from a well known source: ‘man in pub’. He’s ex SAS apparently so has the right ‘contacts’.
In a deal brokered by the Grand Architect himself, Mandelson, the Vatican was brought in. A payment of £15 million (to be collected by the Pope in person) was agreed to have Dumpty silenced forever! (Bids were tendered for under the then Government PFI but the only other contender, MOSSAD, lost out due to passport & immigration issues)
Mandy and his new co-conspirators within the Vatican formed their plan in the death throes of Labours administration. The Vatican, with control over the denizens of Portgower, had the perfect hit squad. Their orders were issued via a ‘local’ contact, a farmer known as ‘Old MacDonald’, reputedly a high ranking Mason.
For the plan to work a coalition had to be formed with the Caithness Illuminate who’s leader, only referred to as ‘Doctor Foster’, became second in command of the operation to silence Dumpty.
In an unprecedented move it saw the Papacy conspire with the Masons, forming a previously unthinkable ‘THEM’ !!:eek::eek::eek:
However for the plan to work experienced hands of the secret services were required, ‘sleepers’ from the KGB and the CIA were brought in. Only referred to as ‘Dish’ and ‘Spoon’ they worked alongside the Vampires of Portgower in their dirty, dastardly double dealings in Dumpty’s demise.
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 16:14
The old Drunken Duck who sat on a wall
got stuck up there and began to bawl
First to the Master and then to the Dame
And Three Blind Mice who all look the same
But Little Boy Blue, so little it's true
Kissed Cinderella and took off her shoe
While his old friend Polly the kettle put on
Then to Market he went with his son John
But Hey Diddle Diddle - who's that on the Fiddle?
And who's jumped over the corn?
Is it Little Jack Horner who came out of the corner
Now wishing he never was born.
But the Old Drunken Duck was stuck on the Wall
And like Humpty Dumpty he just had to fall !
But did he fall or was he pushed
His knees I see are both rather bruished .
Blimey .. this foretells me suffering the same fate as Humpty. Is Trinkie one of "them" or maybe a "daywalker" from Portgower. I am getting scared now. The net is closing in on me, and if all the heavyweights mentioned by Phill's "man in the pub" are arranged against me I need to worry.
THIS was pushed under my door earlier .. :eek:
http://img375.imageshack.us/img375/1447/goodbyeduck2.jpg
was mr dumpty Stavro? if so i know his first name
Bobby? :eek:
Humpty Dumpty committed suicide. From a young age his Mother had drummed into him the following maxim:-
"Son, only people with square arses should try sitting on walls"
Ah so he was indeed a weeble and he just chose the wrong surface for parkin' his ass?
THIS was pushed under my door earlier .. :eek:
http://img375.imageshack.us/img375/1447/goodbyeduck2.jpg
"If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it must be a duck." ;)
"If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, it must be a duck." ;)
Could be a Bomby Duck. Or should that now be a Mumbai Duck?
Could be a Bomby Duck. Or should that now be a Mumbai Duck?
That sounds a bit fishy to me!
That sounds a bit fishy to me!
Of course it does. But perhaps Humpty never really existed.
Of course it does. But perhaps Humpty never really existed.
A pigment of someone's colourful imagination?
Ah so he was indeed a weeble
I don't know whether he had wee balls or not ;)
Tubthumper
25-May-10, 16:46
was mr dumpty Stavro? if so i know his first name
I know his dad's first name as well. But I wouldn't name either of them on a public website - there are too many nutjobs about!
http://img375.imageshack.us/img375/1447/goodbyeduck2.jpg
Hasta La Vista Baby:-
http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i237/scorrie57/duck-blog.jpg
" Orange and lemons say the bells of St Clements," that's fine duck sauce.
Question is, which came first The Duck or The Egg and just what sort of egg was Humpty?
A bad egg or a good egg?
John Little
25-May-10, 19:30
He was a Curate's egg....
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 19:35
Hasta La Vista Baby:-
http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i237/scorrie57/duck-blog.jpg
Mum ?? .. :eek:
Hasta La Vista Baby:-
http://i73.photobucket.com/albums/i237/scorrie57/duck-blog.jpg
PHWOOOAAARRR!!!
MM'mmmm
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 20:37
PHWOOOAAARRR!!!
MM'mmmm
Now its just getting weird for me !!
The Drunken Duck
25-May-10, 20:41
PHWOOOAAARRR!!!
MM'mmmm
And now its just getting weird for me !!
First Dad and his compulsion with extreme sports (he bought it while wire walking across a large pan of boiling orange sauce) and now this .. :~(
Refer to the book 'The Big Over Easy' by Jasper Fforde for the facts of this case!
All too scrambled for me!!!!
He was a Curate's egg....
Any good...?
John Little
26-May-10, 09:24
Good in parts my Lord....
Good in parts my Lord....
[lol][lol][lol]
Good in parts my Lord....
Good in farts as well I hear, and I do mean HEAR!!
Having delved deeper I think Phill may be right. Into my possession has come a crime scene photograph of Humpties demise. As can be clearly seen .. there is no wall !!
http://img34.imageshack.us/img34/2748/picture127r.jpg
Attention has focused on All the Kings Men. Some of their military Engineer types were overhead discussing scrambled eggs recipies and they are experts in explosive detonation. They also have a history of egg abuse and are currently under investigation by Eggnesty International for sickening crimes against defenceless egss. There are claims that they boil them, cut their heads off and then eat the contents. This sickening picture of egg abuse was taken covertly at great risk to the photgrapher. He later ended up in a cheese and tomato omelette for his defiance.
http://img708.imageshack.us/img708/6746/eggcup.jpg
It is not unfeasible that a very carefully planned detonation, using jet fuel, vapourised the structure that Humpty was sitting on. I would check this with Northerner but he was last seen heading into the hills wearing nought but a pair of wellies, a tiger skin thong and an old World War 2 tin hat while muttering about snipers in his garden.
I would urge caution investigating this matter my fellow Orgers, I have just had a visit from the "Egg Advisory Board", unless they now carry MP5's and dress like they are getting ready to storm the Iranian Embassy I fear my life may now be in danger. Or perhaps my visitors were dressed from head to toe in black to shield them from the sunlight ?? .. all I know is .. its getting dangerous.
;)
Be careful out there.
I do wish I had the skill, to give replys like that!
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